1. Tuesday, Februaury 4th, 2014
Hello. How are you? Good , I'm sure. At least you look good. Was that creepy? Probably. Anyway, I decided to start telling you how I feel. Not that you care. Or do you? Would you tell me? Are you scared? I am. I'm terrified. That explains why I always act like a fool around you. I know you'll never have me, never choose me over everyone else, so I guess I shouldn't be wasting so much time on you but... I can't help it. When you smile, my world fades and it's just me and you. And then it's just me because you either walk away, or don't care. I wish you cared. I care. Can I make you care? Do I sound stupid? Yes. No? Really? Okay. It's okay, you can leave. I'm used to being alone. I've got that feeling memorized. Just know that I've got you like a fever and I can't shake the feeling that maybe you got me too. Somewhere in your mind, you say my name. At least once and somewhere. I want to give you my heart but I don't want to waste it because I've only got one. Not that I think you're a waste, but you've got to understand, I'm trying to be careful here. What if you're just some silly crush? I don't feel like you're just a crush but what if I'm reading myself all wrong? All these questions I wish you would answer. Questions I wish I could ask you. Would I be crazy to want you to just say my name? Just say my name. My insides are jelly when I just look at you, but I bet a million dollars that if you said my name, I'd fly. You and me, we could be so Owl City. Maybe you're my "Deer In The Headlights"? But I know you don't listen to him so the meaning is lost on you. Don't pity me. Don't feel bad for me. I can do that well enough on my own. I just want you to stay gorgeous and friendly and genuine and strong. Strong. Yes, that's a great word to describe you. Strong physically, strong mentally, and strong in your will. Yeah. Just strong. Meanwhile, I'll be strong too and hope that birds of a feather do indeed flock together. One day, Adam, we'll fly. I promise you. We'll fly.