So today I had a lunch date with her. Last night was amazing, we really hit things off and I think I really do like her. She's perfect. Her smile, they way her eyes glisten when she looks at me, her perfect laugh and her personality. I can't believe I spent so much time invested in liking Hazel, when this beautiful girl was right in front of me. It wasn't anywhere special, but we were going somewhere we both loved.. Panera Bread.
We had a lot in common. We were both youtubers, liked the same music and foods, we both loved to entertain and we were both into gaming. I wasn't too sure on telling anyone about our date, so I kind of just left the house without saying anything. I felt some what bad because yesterday was Hazel's birthday and I didn't even say happy birthday, not even on twitter. I also heard Sam was coming back to the house to see Hazel, so I wanted to leave before things got awkward. I didn't want my anger to get the best of me. I didn't like them hanging around each other, and I have my reasons, I just didn't know how to explain them to Hazel. Now she just thinks I'm the asshole, rather than Sam, and right now I couldn't care less. I don't need her anymore and I guess I do need to be less protective over her. She was never mine. I have to remind myself that. She was never mine and she never will be. She's happy with Sam Pepper and that's all I should have cared about; her happiness.
But right now, all I need to focus on is my own happiness. I just arrived at Panera's and I saw her car in the parking lot and ran inside. There she was looking as beautiful as ever. I could only see the back of her head at this point, but her long blonde hair was so swift, and her side profile was flawless. She has the cutest nose ever, although people tend to tease it because they think its too big. I think it's perfect. She turned around and saw me gawking at her. I shook my head out of my daze and sat with her.
"Hello handsome." She smiled and rested her head onto her hands. I couldn't help but admire her.
Sam Pepper's POV
I was taking Hazel out today to one of her favorite little take out places, Panera bread. Yesterday was her birthday and everyone had found out because of Maz, I wanted to keep this lunch a secret, it was sort of important to me. Hazel is the most beautiful girl I've ever met. But not just based on her looks, it's her, inside and out. Her personality is so warm and kind, she's got an amazing sense of humor and she is so generous. The more I hang around her though, the more I break down her wall that's she built up around her. I feel like I'm the only one who's been slowly taking it down and I think it's great, it means she trusts me and I possibly mean something to her.
I've slowly been finding out more personal things about her. Hazel is a completely different person to who her friends and fans think. She's always telling everyone they're beautiful and to love themselves, but the person she needs to be telling that to the most, is herself. I will never understand how such a lovely creation like herself could hate herself. I could never understand why she felt the need to hurt herself, or why she would ever starve herself, or why she would ever tell herself she's not enough. I think she's perfect. And I want her to see that.
I went to the O2L house around 1 p.m to pick up Hazel. When I arrived she was already waiting outside like I asked her to. I didn't want to go inside and make a big deal. I didn't want to see JC either, he's got a really strong hatred towards me.
She saw my car pull up and a smile plastered onto her face, a real smile; it was flawless.
"Hey there gorgeous." I smiled.
"Hello Mr Pepper." She kept the smile on her face, "Where are we going today?"
"Only you're favorite take out restaurant."
"Paneras?" She got excited, "I haven't been there in a while, yay."
It honestly made my life that much better just seeing her smile.
We arrived at Panera's and I took a bold move into holding Hazels hand while we walked in, she gripped my hand softly and didn't hesitate when I took a hold of hers. I was happy she was okay with it. Walking in, it wasn't too packed, there were other couples and groups of friends scattered around the place, so we decided to sit at the back.
We took our orders within the first couple of minutes and got straight into talking.
"So, did you have fun last night?" I asked.
"Yes! I don't think I would've changed anything. I was so happy you came though."
"What, did you think I just wasn't going to come to your 18th? Whatever." I laughed.
"No, because of the whole JC thing, you know?" Her smile sort of faded, but she didn't look sad.
"Oh, yeah that. But still, it was your party, not his. I didn't even see him all night, so it was okay." I smiled, hoping that me not seeing him was reassurance that nothing bad happened.
"He wasn't even there." She spoke quietly. Shit. I think I made things worse.
"Oh.. umm.. I'm sorry." I wasn't the best with getting out of awkward situations.
"No, no. It's okay. He's just being a dick."
"Speaking of dicks.." I was looking across the room and saw JC, death glaring me and Hazel. He was with a girl, but I couldn't see her face.
"Is that JC?" Hazel asked looking at him, then looking back at me.
"Yeah, who's he with?"
"Hmm, don't know, don't care." She turned to me and just smiled.
"Well, anyways, enough with him." We both ignored JC, "The reason I asked you to lunch and didn't want anyone else here is because I wanted to talk to you alone.
"Oh, sorry for telling Maz then, I thought seeing as he was your best friend, he could come. Oops." She giggled.
"No, that's fine. I explained to him after and he understood." There was an awkward pause, which turned into a longer awkward pause when we received our food. "Are you gonna eat?" I asked.
"Yeah." Hazel said, picking up her fork and playing around with it in her food.
"You're beautiful, you know that?" I turned my head to a slight angle and watched her face, it was sort of.. emotionless. "You can eat and still be beautiful.." I said, and she kept quiet. "Hazel, please.."
"Please what?" She glanced at me.
"I don't know, listen to me."
"Sam, I know you mean well, but I don't think you understand what it's like to feel the way I do." She looked back down at her food.
"You're right. I don't understand, and I probably never will. But I can try. I've already started to learn. I know it's hard Hazel, but you will learn to love yourself, you've taught so many people to and I think it's time someone taught you."
"You're a really genuine person, you know that? I.. I like you Sam." She looked up at me with a worried face, I knew she was worried about what my reaction would be.
"Hazel, don't look so scared."
"I'm scared of life, always paranoid. I think it's impossible for me not to."
"I want you to look at life from a different perspective. I want you to see life through my eyes, and I want to see life through yours."
"I couldn't hurt you like that Sam."
"But you wouldn't be hurting me. It's what I want."
"There are so many things we as people want, but can we always get these?"
"If you work for it, I believe you can have anything." I store into her eyes.
"And how are you going to work for a different perspective of life?" She asked.
"Baby steps. It may take a while, but I'm willing to give up forever for you."
"That's sweet Sam, but.."
"No buts. Hazel, will you be my girlfriend." I took her hands and smiled.
"Oh wow, ye-"
"No, she will not be your girlfriend." I got startled when Hazel got pulled away from the table.
"JC, what the hell do you think you're doing?" I stood up and tried not to yell and cause a scene.
"You're not protecting her, JC. Doing this is not what she wants."
"But the things she wants are no good for her." He growled.
"Look, JC, I'm sorry but I like Hazel. And I'm pretty sure she likes me, so why do you have to interfere with us all the time?" I pleaded, "Besides, you're here with someone."
"JC, please just leave us." Hazel jumped in, "I don't need you here right now. Just go back to your lunch date or whatever."
JC looked into her eyes, she was angry.
"Fine. But remember, when he hurts you, don't come crying to me." JC walked off.
"Sam, I think I want to go home."
"I understand." I took Hazel by the hand and paid the bill while walking out. As I passed JC I took the chance to look at the girl he was with. Hazel tried ignoring them and didn't see who it was. To my surprise, it was a familiar face, Hazels best friend. It was Jenn.
The car ride to the O2L house was long and quiet. I pulled up in front of the drive way and waited for Hazel to get out, but she just sat there, starring out the window.
"Can you believe that?" She asked out of no where.
"Hm.. nothing. She went back into her train of thoughts."
"Did you need me to take you anywhere?" I asked.
"No.." She looked at me, "Bye Sam, I'll see you later." She smiled and jumped out of the car.
I watched her walk inside before I drove off and not long after, I received a text from Hazel with a single word. It said nothing but,