Chapter 16: Jealousy
I had avoided seeing the boys at all cost since the break in the tour started. I felt awkward around Ashton since I had told him I just wanted to be friends. I felt awkward around Luke because I wasn’t really sure how I felt about him. And if I was there, I tried to only talk to Mike and Cal because they had no idea what was going on with anyone and I intended on keeping it that way.
I hadn’t been there for about two and half weeks. It was really hard to avoid it though. Especially when I was bored. But I had been hanging out with Eleanor a lot. She was really cool. She took me shopping a lot and helped me pick out clothes that weren’t all lame, like the ones I had currently. And as much fun as that was, I really missed the boys.
The tour was about to start back up and this time we were heading to America. I felt like I should go and spend some time with them and sort out the awkwardness before I was forced to be with them 24/7.
I walked into the house without knocking and without telling them I was coming. They were rehearsing. It sounded like a new song. I listened outside the door until the song was over.
“She's so out of reach, and I'm finding it hard
'Cause she makes me feel, makes me feel,
Like I try, like I try, like I'm trying too hard,
'Cause I'm not being me, and it's getting me down
That she makes me think, makes me think,
That I try, that I try, that I'm trying too hard again
(and again, and again, and again, and again)
'Cause I'm trying too hard again
(and again, and again, and again, and again)
'Cause I'm trying too hard again”
I heard the last chords of the song and then heard the boys yell in approval.
“Yea! We are so performing that in America!” I heard Luke say excitedly.
“Definitely! Great song Ashton and Luke!” Michael said.
“Yeah I loved it!” a female voice I didn’t recognize said. Huh? They have girl friends? I took that as my cue to enter the room.
“Was that a new song?” I said as I walked through the doorway. All five heads turned in my direction. The fifth member being a very pretty red head with striking brown eyes, who was sitting on an amp in the corner of the room near Luke.
“Oh hey Ry! Where did you disappear off to? And yeah it’s a song that we just finished! We want to play it in America.” Calum said.
“Oh well that’s cool. It sounded great!” I said.
“Yeah a lot better than it sounded the first time they played it,” the red head girl said with an obnoxious laugh. Eww..I didn’t like her already. But I figured I should give her a chance. I walked over to her and held out my hand.
“Hi, I’m Rylie. My mom is their tour manager. And you are?” I said with as much politeness as I could muster.
She stood up before she took my hand, making her stand about 5 inches above my 5’3 frame. I stepped back and she took my hand firmly. “Amber, Luke’s….friend.” she said with a hint of uncertainty and a smile.
I looked over my shoulder at Luke who was staring at something on his guitar. “Oh a friend of Luke’s? Funny. He’s never mentioned you,” I said surprised with my bitchiness.
She continued smiling at me while squeezing my hand. “Oh really? What a coincidence. I was just about to say the same thing about you.” she said.
We stared at each other with fake smiles for I don’t even know how long, until Ashton broke the silence.
“Uh I’m gonna get some pizza…does anyone else want to order some? Rylie…?” the sound of my name made me break my stare off with Amber. I dropped her hand and swiftly walked out of the room and into the kitchen, embarrassed with how I just acted. Suddenly Ashton was right beside me.
“So uhh…what was with that?” he said uncertainly.
“Who is she?” I asked demandingly.
“Uh well she’s Luke’s ex girlfriend. She was really controlling over him, but he was so infatuated with her. Once he started getting more serious about the band, she cheated on him and claimed it was because he wasn’t paying enough attention to her. He was broken,” Ashton said angrily.
“So why is she here?” I said more angrily.
“Luke decided to give her another shot.” He replied bitterly.
“Uh what? Is he stupid? He can’t do that!” I said, almost yelling.
“Woah Rylie calm down. It’s really not that big of a deal. Luke will realize how stupid he’s being and then dump her before she can hurt him again. I won’t let her hurt him again. He was torn up by her.” Ashton said.
I didn’t say anything, due to trying to calm myself down. I stared at the ground for what seemed like forever, concentrating on my breathing. Luke is so stupid. She obviously is just back because of his break with the tour. What a bitch. Ugh. What was he thinking? He deserved someone so much better. A little voice in the back of my head whispered “me”. I shook my head to get rid of the thought. No. That can’t happen, especially now since I had that thing with Ashton.
I just realized that I was in the same room with Ashton…alone…awkward. I lifted my head to see him standing next to me, staring straight ahead blankly. I felt bad for him. He was so sweet.
“Uh I have a headache, I think I’m gonna go sit on the couch,” I said quickly, not wanting to be alone with him anymore.
I hurried out of the kitchen and into the living room to see Amber basically sitting on top of Luke on the couch. Ewww, I thought feeling my eyes roll in disgust. Never mind. I’m just gonna leave. I didn’t want to watch this anymore.
I turned to the right to see Ashton standing in the kitchen doorway looking between Luke and me. His expression went from confusion, to a look of understanding, then to anger. He shook his head as we made eye contact, brushed past me and went up the stairs.
I walked out of the house quickly before my tears could escape my eyes. I hurried around the corner and sat down on a bench on the sidewalk, as I cried. This is the last thing I wanted. My best friend of 10 year is back with some girl that doesn’t deserve him, I am totally confused about what I feel for Luke, totally confused about what I feel for Ashton, and now Ashton knows who the other guy is. And to top it all off, I get to spend the next four months with them in America.
I sat in silence as the tears poured out. What was I going to do?