If we make the same mistakes, over and over again...., is it really a mistake anymore? It's not that I don't believe in love it's that I'm afraid of getting hurt again, going through all of the hurt, the pain, the heartbreak, the depression. I'm just afraid. Afraid of myself... afraid of getting hurt, because it's not the goodbye that hurts... it's the flashbacks that follow. But yet I still keep coming back why are you so damn contagious?


3. Chapter 3

 As the sun slowly rose up, behind the mountains. Luke & I were laying in bed, cuddling. My body pressed up against his warm chest. I just wanted to be with Luke, the way he holds me makes me forget about life. Forget about the bad things. I felt completely protected, and safe in his arms. As I think quietly to myself, maybe he is the one. Maybe he's the one I've dreamt about for so long. Maybe he's the one who will stay with me, but then maybe he's just another one of the two faced people. Maybe he's just another person who is here for only a month. Maybe he's the one that would mess things up, but then again maybe I'm the one who will mess things up. Maybe I'm the one that will push people away. Nobody deserves to be with me. My hair is a tangly mess, I'm not skinny, no matter how many people tell me I am. They just don't know what it is like to have society tell you to be something you're not, but yet you give in to society because then maybe if you are perfect or pretend to be you will be happy. That's why I fake a smile everyday, fake a laugh every second. I'm not as happy as I used to be. Why can't I be little again? When I used to not fake a smile, when I used to not care what I look like, when I used to have friends. When the only drama was who had the biggest crayon package. I miss them. I grew up to fast, but honey let me tell you something that's what society does to people. I'm getting lost in my thoughts again. As I take a gasp of breath to come back to my reality, all the memories and the pain floods back. I cringe at those painful memories. How can you love 2 people at the same time? Luke kisses me on the forhead, and rubs my back trying to calm me down. He always helps, even if he doesn't understand half the things I go through. The only thing I want to do is to be with Luke for a very long time. 

( Luke's P.O.V)

     I sigh in relief, knowing I didn't screw things up. I was foresure that I lost her as my best friend, but now I have her as more than best friends. My love of my life, is in my arms. My love, the one I adore is laying next to me fast asleep. Her breathing is slow and calm. I smile, everything in my life is perfect. More than perfect. I was happy again. I roll over still pressing my body close to Natalie's to keep her warm. I put my arm around her, as I slowly began to drift away into my dreams of Natalie.

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