"Ellie? Can I talk to you?" Luke pulled me away from the group. Cara, Michael, Calum, Taylor- calum's new girlfriend- Luke, and I were all sitting around Cara's room. Bowls of chips, bottles of soda, pizza boxes, and wrapping paper littered the floor around us. Nathan was in Memphis visiting family, while I was stuck in Nashville. Don't get me wrong, I love it here, but I was supposed to spend Christmas with Nate.
"Yeah, sure. What's up?" I got up and followed Luke to Cara's spare bedroom.
"Look, I really really like you. I think you're smart, and gorgeous, and whenever I'm around I feel something."
"Luke..." I sighed and I walked away, but he pulled me back.
"And I know you feel it too." He inched closer to my face and I just stood there. He leaned in and gave me a kiss.
"I.. I can't." I pulled away after a few seconds. "This isn't right."
"Because of Nathan."
"Yeah... I love him, Luke. I'm sorry." Luke walked out and left me standing there. I just cheated on my boyfriend. I cheated on the guy I've been with my entire life, the guy I was going to spend the rest of my life with.
But it was just one kiss. Nothing really happened. It was no big deal, right?
I took a deep breath and walked back to Cara's room
For the rest of the time, I couldn't look Luke in the eye, I did all I could to avoid him.
"So spill." Cara laid down on her stomach on her bed and I sat on the ground, resting my back against the bed. The guys left only moments earlier, leaving Cara and I alone.
"What happened when Luke asked to talk to you?"
"Well, he said he liked me and then he kissed me." Cara's jaw dropped.
"Sssh! Shut up! It was fast and innocent. I don't have feelings for him." It wasn't lie, but it wasn't the entire truth. The truth was I was attracted to Luke Hemmings. He was tall and shy, like me. Plus, I always had a soft side for guys who were in a band and played guitars...
"Okay, back up, there is nothing innocent about you." I made a face at Cara. "Oh come on, El. Your sweet 16?"
"That was two and a half years ago! Let it go!" It was true, my sweet sixteen I was a wreck. I did stuff, said stuff, and I acted like a complete brat. It also happened to be the first time I slept with Nate.
"So then what?"
"That. I said I couldn't, so then he came back and I came back a few minutes later. Please don't tell anyone. Not Mikey, not Ashton, and especially not Nate."
"I won't! I promise."
For the rest of the night, Cara and I sat in silence watching movies and eating leftover junk food. My mind kept going back to Luke and the kiss. I didn't know if I should tell Nate, it would ruin him. Sure I had other boyfriends before him, but he didn't have the same luck. I was his first kiss, first girlfriend, first love, first everything. I didn't want to be his first heartbreak too. Maybe I won't tell him, he won't know. He can't know.
Even if it was an innocent kiss... It's not like I slept with anyone else.