I sit for a few minutes replaying everything that just happened in my head. Niall thinks I’m perfect? I look over at the boys who are staring into the doorway of the bunks. I turn my head and see Zayn standing there, looking confused.
“What is going on?” he practically growls. “It is all silent until I hear Harry scream that she’s hot followed by Niall angrily shouting at Arielle about being perfect...?”
Everybody stays silent for a moment before Louis speaks.
“Arielle was just thinking that she is too fat because of the fans’ hate. That’s why...” he trails off.
Zayn takes a moment to think about this before sitting down across from me and looking sadly at me.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispers, breaking my heart.
I stay silent. I’m not sure what to do right now. Everything is so conflicted and I am beginning to feel extremely confused. I want to be mad at Zayn for what he did to me and Niall, but I also feel like I am breaking him down. He has been lifeless ever since I told him I hate him. I know I have to decide here and now whether to forgive him or not. I take a deep breath and answer:
“I am so confused right now,” I start quietly, everybody’s eyes on me. “I want to be angry with you, Zayn. I feel so guilty, though. I can see you wearing down. I just wish you hadn’t done that to Niall. He was one of the few people I have ever met that could make me feel so comfortable and was easy for me to talk to. You and Vi were the only others, but I feel like I can talk to you less and less. I want you back in my life so much Zayn, but you are making it hard and... I don’t hate you.”
There is an awkward silence as Zayn gives me an unreadable expression for a few moments. The rest of the boys stare intently at him. He finally stands up, sits down next to me, and wraps his strong arms around me.
“I want you to be able to talk to me. I want to fix this, Ari,” he mumbles into my hair.
I smile slightly and we both pull away.
“So I can hang out with Niall again?” I ask hopefully and his face drops.
“I’m sorry, but I still don’t want you to see him,” he says, shaking his head.
Just as I thought he understood...