I just found out I wont be able to see anyone for two days. I really just want to see Vic, thats the only person I wanted to see. I was greatfull to have Julia to visit me too. I still can't really remember what happened that night with Claire, all I knew is that I didn't want to talk to her for a bit. I still cared about her, I just didn't like the fact that she is still doing drugs. I could only think about the last thing I said to Vic "I can't go back there", I really worried about everything he could think I meant by that. The doctors have been running a whole bunch of test on me since my Heart attack, I only thought old people had those. The doctors told me it was normal, after coming out of coma something usually happens, just my luck it was a heart attack. I really want to get the hell out of this hospital, I want my life to go back to normal.
"I'm sorry." I heard a quiet whisper come from the door. It was dark in my room, I tried to see who it was.
"Hello?" I say quietly.
"You can't know who I am, I just wanted to say sorry." I moved back in my bed when the person moved closer to me. They sighed when I moved back.
"You have to tell me who you are." I started to raise my voice a little, they moved over to me quickly and shut me up by placing there lips on mine. I pushed them off fast.
"NO! I have a boyfriend!" I screamed. I heard the doctors starting to make their way down to my room.
"Izzy!" I then jumped up from my bed and shoved the person in the bathroom, and ran back and laid down and pretened to sleep.
Once the doctors left my room, I jumped up from my bed and went over to the bathroom. I opened the door and the person rushed out. They tried to go for the door but i grabbed their arm and turned on the lights. It was Vic.
"What would you be sorry for." I felt a sense of relief once I knew it was him.
"For not being able to protect you." He claimed, what was he supposed to do, how would he know i was being beaten by my old foster brother who raped me? How would he have been able to protect me?. I took a second before replying to him. He moved a piece of hair away from my face.
"Vic, there was no way you could have protected me. So don't best yourself up about this. I'm alright now, don't worry about me." The truth was, I didn't know if i was really "alright". I just wanted him to not feel bad about this whole thing. It wasn't his fault what so ever.
"You're so beautiful" he said in a whispered voice. I look down at myself, to notice my robe was open, everything was showing. I quickly covered myself back up and made my way back to my bed. I threw the blanket over top of me so i was completely covered.
"Is that the only reason you came? To say sorry for something you didn't do." I say a bit rudely, that everything was showing and he didn't care to tell me.
"No." He suddenly had this worried look on his face, i could see sadness and fear in his eyes.
"What's wrong Vic?" I said honestly censored.
"Well, you remember that girl you got into that fight with?" He said taking a seat next to my bed. The fight? Oh yeah that dumb chick who thought Vic liked her. I found myself staring in to space, i quickly turned to him.
"Yeah what about her?" I say remembering him telling me she had died.
"Well you were going to have a court date. But since you ended up here, they thought you had gotten into another fight. So, they deicide you would have to go to prison. No court date anymore." I was surprised, that Claire hadn't come and explained what had really happened to me. I wasn't to scared to go back to prison. I mean it wasn't so bad, i got to miss school which was good. "And Izzy, before all this happened on the phone you said "I cant go back there." What did you mean by that?" Dammit why did he have to bring that up. That was my past, it meant nothing now. I've moved on from that, but he clearly wants me to dig up my past so he can know everything about me.
"Listen, I'm going to tell why i was there before, but you have to promise me that what i am going to tell you wont leave this room." I really didnt want anyone else to know about it.
"I promise." He said.
"Alright, I u-uh killed one of my old foster dad's" I felt a cold shiver run through my whole body. Vic sat there frozen, not saying a word. No one ever gave me the chance to explain why i did that. I had my reasons, he was beating my younger brother Jo, he died that night also. From my old dad, so for killing my brother i killed him. It was all in the moment of angry, i wouldn't have done it if he didn't kill my brother in front of me. It would have been better if he was the one doing time in prison. Not me. Vic stood up and started to head for the door.
"Let me explain!" I shouted.
"Save it." He looked back at me as a few tears fell down his cheek, when he looked at me it wasn't the same as before. It wasn't a look filled with love and care, it was a look filled with hatred, disgust. My heart had broken, i couldn't lose the one person i truly loved, after i had just opened up to him. This is why i am always so closed. I watched Vic walk out in anger, I was soon alone in my room.
After two days, i haven't heard anything from Vic, i was aloud to see people now, but no one came. The doctors said i was aloud to leave in a few days, depending on how my tests work out. Without seeing Vic or Julia, Kyla or jim, i felt alone. I felt lost, you could say depressed.