Chapter 1 Natasha's Pov
I sat beside the school bathroom toilet holding my hair back, words flooded through my head "Ugly" "Slut" "Your never good enough" "Die" "Die in hell" "Whore" I tried my hardest to ignore my thoughts, I gasped for air and backed away from the toilet, letting go of my long black hair. I held my wrists up to my face "Why do I do this to myself, I'm wrecking my skin, my body, myself" I stood up staggering then opened the toilets cubical door, I stood in front of the square mirrors displayed in front of me where I was when I first entered the bathroom. I reached into my makeup bag which I left by the sink and pulled out my set of bracelets and a small cloth covered in detailed flowers and vines. I held the cloth underneath the tap and wet the cloth, I looked into the mirror at myself and deep into my eyes, they were black and thick tears fell down from them, I wiped them away roughly then re-applied my makeup. I looked at my wrists and picked up the set of bracelets, I split them in half so there were enough for both my wrists, I slipped them on my wrist then picked up my school bag that sat underneath the sink and chucked my makeup bag inside it and moved to the bathroom exit. I stopped looking at the bathroom door then hit my head hard on the wood of it "Why am I alive?!" I whispered clenching my teeth shut tight, trying my hardest not to cry. I removed my head from the door and pushed it slowly open and walked through it shamefully.
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Everybody around me stared at me as I trudged past them into the long school hall, where were Brooke, Janice and Destiny? I felt a hand grab my shoulder but I didn't turn around as I didn't want my face to meet someone's fist. "Nat?" I sighed with relief and spun around and hugged one of my best friends Brooke "Where were you last block?? Me, Janice and destiny were worried, were always worried! You ditch all the time? Why?" Brooke asked expectantly "Don't worry! Everything's ok" I laughed like nothing right now mattered, Brooke raised an eyebrow "Alright then... But you know Hun! If you ever need a shoulder to lean on, I'm here" she patted my back and skipped down the hall.
My eyes sprinted to the school hall clock it was 7 minutes past the end of school for the day, I scanned my eyes around me and I gripped my school bag tightly when I saw my highschool bully approach me. I took quick steps towards the big double doors to the outside of the school, I wasn't far from them. I looked behind my back again and the bully was closer than before. I finally reached the door and pulled it open and scurried through.
I looked behind me again and stumbled while running I reached the concrete steps to the outside of the gates, I gained my balance and skipped down the steps, I felt everyone around me looking at the person chasing me and me running away, I reached the gate and skid through it and slammed it shut behind me, the person chasing me met my eyes, she had long brown curly hair and wore fish net stockings and everything you can imagine a slut wearing.
"Awe is poor Natasha scared" she cooed to me but I ignored her, she backed away from the gate and moved her hand across her neck back and forth in a slicing motion to me then moved back up the stairs and disappeared inside.
I let go of the fence and sighed, I walked down the road still feeling the stares of others around me, I glared at them "What?" I snapped at them, they turned their heads back around quickly.
I was use to all this, the crying, the pain, the Bullying and the swearing, but the shameful thing about it all... Was that my life at home wasn't at all much different.
***** Authors note ******
This is my new fanfic guys!! It gets better soon so don't worry! Please read it and vote it :)) comment what you think of it please!!!! Stay in touch for chapter 2!!! Fan me too!!!! :)) thx guys!!!