25. my life
Hey guys i'm back again, i felt like 2 updates would make up for the time i didn't update. I wonder if Alex will actually read this, i was really serious about getting him to know about all of this. I want him to know this side of me writing everything out so i won't stress out as much. If he can't handle me writing about everything then there's no other choice. There will never be a choice, if he can handle my weirdness then he can handle this.
I honestly feel like i'm fucking things up with my shitty ass clingyness. I'm not used to having boyfriends because i have only had 2 fucking boyfriends Angel and Alex. It's been almost a month since we've started dating. The only one who knows the truth is Maddie. All my other friends think that he lives in Seattle, he's home schooled, my aunt is friends with his mom, i see him all the time. But that's all a fucking lie, my own fucking friends can even trust me. I fucking sugar coat every fucking thing, just so i won't have to face the fucking facts. I try to run away from the lies but it comes back and bites me in the ass.
I can't get away i'm to fucking deep and too fucking far to tell my friends the truth. I can't see how they can trust me but all i do is fucking lie to their faces, and i regret it later.