I can sniff the end coming up.... wait, that's kind of gross.... it smells nice though.
"Seriously?" I muttered to myself when a sign read there was a hundred and ten more miles to Arcade.
I heard Emily stir in her seat beside me, but I ignored it as I continued driving. She wouldn't say anything to me, or hadn't since since we woke up this morning. I don't know why, maybe I had said something I shouldn't have, but I felt a bit hurt by the silence. It was actually pretty unfair. Why couldn't she talk to me? Why am I being forced to drive in silence, again? Maybe I was the one being a jerk, but I couldn't help it anymore. I was tired of hiding how I really felt around her. I told myself to be confident a couple of times before I took a deep breath.
"Looks like we're going to actually be able to see the sun for the entire day." I spoke out loud in hopes Emily would show some interest. After glancing at her and finding her asleep, I sighed.
Of course Emily would be asleep. I had to wake her up in the morning, which was very awkward. She didn't say anything then, but stretched and yawned. I wanted to talk to her, I actually tried, but she shrugged me away. It was like I had offended her and now I'm just another person to her.
Feeling myself becoming more frustrated, I rubbed one side of my face with my hand and just continued on driving. The road didn't seem as endless during the day. I didn't feel tired or exhausted, because I was only frustrated and it was evident as my fingers mindlessly tapped the steering wheel to some made-up tune. I would've turned on the radio to clear a bit of the silence, but I didn't want to disturb Emily. She was causing me unnecessary stress, yet I was still mindful of her. I was driving myself crazy.
"Niall?" I heard Emily mutter beside me, but her voice sounded so far away as if she was speaking her dreams out loud. That would have been something if she actually dreamed about me.
"Hmm?" I hummed for her to continue. I didn't bother glancing at her because she would continue to look anywhere but me.
"Niall?" She said louder and clearer.
"Yes?" I asked this time, patiently waiting for her to tell me whatever it is. Maybe she actually wanted to talk. I could have used a talk.
"Niall!" She yelled and in that moment I knew she was in fact dreaming about me. Instead of smiling about it, I frowned. She could talk to me in a dream, but not out loud in person?
"Niall!" She yelled louder, almost frantically.
My senses finally kicked in and I glanced over at her to see her face scrunched up as if she were confused, scared, or upset. Part of me wanted to ignore her like she had been ignoring me, but the rest of me said to take the exit that was coming up and pull over. She had yelled my name once more before I pulled over and stopped the car. She also became restless and started stirring as if to find a more comfortable position. I hesitated to reach my hand over and place it on her shoulder. She would hit me, I bet.
"Emily." I spoke her name calmly. She didn't seem fazed in her sleep. She stopped moving, which may have been a good sign.
"Niall." She whispered breathlessly. It sounded like a response, but her eyes were still shut so I knew she was still asleep.
"Emily." I said firmer and louder. It took her a couple of moments, but she opened her eyes and looked around before stopping at me and frowning.
"You were calling my name... and... I just thought that... I woke you up." I tried to explain. I should have just left her.
"Bad dreams happen." She shrugged. I nodded.
"You're okay, right?"
"It was a bad dream. I didn't fall on my face." Well, she got her attitude back or maybe she was just grumpy.
"That's lovely." I muttered as I started the truck again.
Just as I merged back onto the interstate, I felt Emily place her hand on my arm. From my shoulder to my fingers, I felt my arm become stiff and cold. I became nervous and every move, every action, was cautious. Is she going to do something? What if she starts squeezing my arm really hard? What if she pinches me? I started coming up with all these possible scenarios before I stopped myself. She hasn't hurt me physically and I'm an idiot if I believed she really would.
"I'm sorry. In my dream you... it wasn't a good dream and I was still recovering from it. I didn't mean to sound like a bitch."
"It's alright, whatever." I shrugged off her apology, but I also shrugged her hand off my arm.
"You're still upset."
"Look, I don't know what-"
"Why have you been ignoring me all morning?"
"You didn't even say anything to me when I
woke you up. Did I hit a nerve without knowing? Did I piss you off?"
"No, but it sure looks like I did."
"You did. I-I... I don't know. I've been very frustrated and you made me feel like I was invisible to you."
"You're impossible, you know that?"
"I'm impossible? Really?"
"You're the one who's impossible! I don't understand you 85% of the time and 13.9999% of the time I make up answers."
"I don't understand you 100% of the time. You're weird."
"How can you say I'm weird?"
"You just are!"
"At least I have my reasons for being weird!"
"I have mine, too! Don't you dare say I'm abnormal."
"Well, you're not freaking perfect Emily!"
"Neither are you, Niall!"
"I never claimed to be!"
"Neither have I! It's like you're still living in some fairytale world!"
"That's because I actually live!"
"Oh, and I don't?"
"No, you don't! Have you even played bored games? Did you do anything in high school?"
"You know the answer to that."
"Then how can you sit there and say you live your life?"
"Doing shit is not the only way you can justify whether or not you've lived your life. I have lived just as much as the next person."
"Have you ever thought of doing more?"
"As a matter of a fact, I have."
"Yes, I think visiting your parents is proof."
"Proof you're doing more?"
"It's proof that I see there's more to life than I thought there was before. It's proof that I'm seeing things differently."
"It's proof you've changed."
"Damn right, I have."
"That's not convincing."
"I never said it was a total makeover and I'm a whole new human being."
I didn't bother with a response to Emily. I just kept my eyes on the road as I had been. My grip on the steering wheel had tightened and as I felt my teeth grinding, I knew I was pissed, maybe even angry. She did it, though. It's her fault, not mine. She started it. My mind went on and on to the point the gray fog of anger passed and I realized we just argued for no reason, and it was totally my fault. I didn't even try to glance at Emily. This was better than the drive to Gaylord- haha, not really.
"Just shut up, okay? I don't want to hear it."
"I swear, don't."
"No, I'm sorry. You can stay in whatever state you're in, hate me, whatever. You don't have to listen, I don't care. I'm sorry. The last thing I wanted was some stupid argument."
"Stupid? Did you seriously forget what you said to me?"
"I didn't mean it."
"In that moment, when the words left your mouth, you did. That's what hurts and I do hate you for that. But do you want to know the insane part that pisses me off more? I don't care. I just don't care. I forgave you as soon as you didn't have a response."
"I can't say the same. It took me a while to realize what happened, but I immediately regretted it."
"Of course you did."
"Is there something more you want to say because you might as well just let everything out right now."
"I really hate forgiving people easily. I'm the person who holds grudges."
"When I said you're impossible, I didn't mean it as an insult. You just really are impossible. It's like you defy everything I know to be a fact."
"Oh look, we have about half an hour more." I pointed out as we passed another sign, hoping it would change subjects. I don't think I will ever go on another random road trip with Emily ever again. One minute we're silent, another we're fighting, and another we're being deep. The changes made me dizzy. Okay, I just want to avoid what else, if anything, she has to say. Fine, I want to avoid saying something wrong or stupid. My confidence tried flying out window, but it kind of crashed into it.
"We should stop and have something to eat when we reach."
"What do you have in mind?"
"Tacos. I like lengua."
"Gross! Isn't that tongue?"
"Yes, it's the cow's tongue and it's amazing."
"That's disgusting. You can have that, I'm eating real meat."
"Real meat? You should try it."
"No, thank you."
"Fine, but afterwards, we'll drive to the apartments and you're coming straight over."
"You're... you're not going to... you know, try to off me?"
Emily immediately erupted into a fit of laughter, snorting a couple of times when she lost her breath. She thought it was hilarious but I was dead serious.
"Why the hell would I do that?"
"Why wouldn't you?"
"I feel like we've been through this or something similar."
"Aren't you, like I don't know, pissed off at me?"
"It's funny how fast a person's mood and mind can change, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Are you ever sure of yourself?"
"There's like one or two things I'm sure about."
"First, you're crazy. Second, you're disgusting for liking to eat tongue."
"Oh, stop being over dramatic. You're a wuss for not wanting to try it."
"The thought of it sickens me."
"You never tried it! Don't knock it."
"You're making me gag." I made fake noises and Emily just laughed.
"You're such a wuss."
"I'm sorry for being sane."
"I triple-dog dare you to eat it."
"I triple-dog dare you to never triple-dog dare me to do anything."
"Oh my god, you're the biggest wuss ever!"
"Shut up! I'm not doing it."
"You have to do it. I triple-dog dared you."
"C'mon." I whined.
"Nope, you have to try it. If you don't like it, I won't force you to eat it."
"Now I know how you felt earlier when you said you hated me but instantly forgave me."
"It's frustrating, right?"
"You have no idea."
"Welcome to my life, Pretty Boy."
"I feel this way daily, Em."
"Story of my life, Blondie."
"To the day I die, Sour Patch."
"Sour Patch? Like the candy? Are you fucking serious?"
"You're sour and then sweet."
"Oh good lord."
"You're the green ones."
"Oh, I'm a green one?"
"Yup, I'm serious."
"How much longer do we have?"
"Mmm, the sooner we reach, the better."
"Lighten up, Buttercup."
"So about offing you," Emily started and I quickly looked over at her.
"You're not funny, Jack."
"Jack? What the hell?"
"You know, like Jack and Sally. Not Jack and Rose."
"Because he has this big idea..." I trailed off when I realized that my explanation sucked.
"I think you're Jack."
"No, I'm not. I think I'm Sally."
"You're definitely both Jacks."
"Then who are you?"
"Those evil kids and Rose's mom."
"I hated Rose's mom."
"She reminded me of my parents in certain aspects."
"Aaron and Vince are cool people."
"Don't talk about them like they are your friends, please. That's weird."
"Whatever you say, Rose."
"Don't let go, Jack." I tried quoting the movie.
"Oh, I'm letting go. I'm gonna laugh my head off, too."
"You so would."
"Yes, because you suck with nicknames."
"I don't suck. Sour Patch has to be my favorite."
"I'll let you have that and Em."
"What about Buttercup? That was a nice one."
"I hate it."
"Bella, from Twilight. She reminds me of you."
"You're a fucking idiot. Just drop me off right here, please. I'll hitch a ride."
"What did I say?"
"You just compared me to Twilight. I let the two Jacks slide, but you crossed the line."
"Oh my god, you're such a hater."
"Of course, because Twilight is the stupidest, most ridiculous movie ever. It makes sense that you like it."
"If you strip away some of the details sand look at it as a whole, it's not bad. It's really good."
"You've got to be fucking kidding me, you're defending it?"
"Have you even read the books or watched the movies?"
"No, I had better things to do than waste my time keeping up with vampires and werewolves."
"You can't keep up with them because they're fast. They're insanely fast and werewolves are even faster."
"Fuck my life, how the hell did I end up in a truck with a nerd?"
"You like me and you know it."
"Fine, but I'm not clapping."
"And you call me lame." I muttered.
Emily replied with some snarky comment and our sort of conversation came to an end. I smiled in the silence that followed while Emily stared out of the window. I was truly content with how things ended even though she made fun of me. I can't deny the fact that I find it funny when teases me, though. It was also satisfying to know that she wasn't pissed at me. I guess my confidence somehow came back, not fully but it was there. This car ride didn't turn out as bad and then I started to feel guilty for thinking she was upset with me. After what just happened, it's impossible to ever think that. She can forgive me, but I promised myself I would never put her into a situation where she'd have to again.
Idk how I feel about this chapter.... there was a lot of talking. I thought some of it was funny, though