I'm Sorry That I Loved You

Louis and Harry have always been close, Harry's youth persuading him that it's only brotherly love but over a painful period of time, he recognises how mistaken he was, he realises that he's sorry for everything that has happened. ~This is Larry Stylinson so sorry if you don't like it but...~

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2. Chapter 1


Harry paced around the front room, waiting for his best friend to return back from Eleanor's, as his phone began to ring, hesitatingly picking it up and reading the caller ID he accepted
"Oh, hey Nialler" he said smiling at the friendly voice that he assumed would greet him on the other end of the line.
"Haz where's Lou, El called and said he's not been at hers at all tonight and well... she's freaked..." Niall sounded in a panic as Harry tried to calm one of his best friends down on the phone whilst walking around the living room frantically looking for anything that could explain where he was, when there, on the table, scribbled down in a note book was a message.

Haz,
Just going to take el down to the river for a picnic, 
Be back real soon, even if you can't see me.
I Love You,
Lou xx
 

"He left a note saying he was by the river with El but..." Harrys bottom lip began to quiver as he read over the note repetitively. "Niall it..it's too late..." A single tear rolled gracefully down his face as the overwhelming realisation of what might have happened or what was soon to happen hit him painfully.    "Meet me at the river, just the lad's don't bring her..." He said sniffling down the phone line as Niall confusedly muttered and agreed, the phone went dead. As this happened, Harry raced against time to throw on his Jacket and a pair of Vans repeating the same line over and over again 'please be okay, please be okay...', as he sprinted down to his car and drove as quickly as possible to the river. As the car stopped the lad's pulled up beside him.

"What's happened?" Zayn asked yawning as Harry explained briefly panicking. A sharp and deafening BANG was heard echoing through the surroundings. Sprinting down the banks of the river leaving the boys at the top, Harry's knees went weak, crumbling at the sight of his best friend. Running to him with uncontrollable tears, the boys had just arrived to the bank, all wide eyed, all horrified, all sobbing, as Liam shakily rung for the ambulance. Harry clenched onto Louis' hand, desperate to find a pulse, as tears filled all the creases on his best friends shirt, the slight reminiscence of a pulse was felt yet so faint a mouse wouldn't function under such distant heartbeats, yet the young and fragile boy was filled with hope. The distant ringing of the ambulance grew nearer and before Harry could pluck the courage to talk, Louis got escorted away into the care of the doctors, screaming to be allowed in for over half an hour the paramedics eventually caved in and allowed him into the vehicle. Seeing him laid there plugged into to every machine, repetitively being given electric pulses, Harry broke down falling to his knees, as the endless flat-line pierced through his eardrums
"I'm sorry, But he's gone..." the doctor knelt down to Harry and softly rubbed his arm as he shook him off shaking his head screaming that 'they were wrong, he'd never leave him, he'd never leave the band' but once again the doctor sympathetically spoke those words, handing Harry a small envelope
"This was in your friends coat Mr Styles, I truly am sorry, we tried everything." Harry was undoubtedly the biggest mess as he sat there on the cold floor, staggering to his feet, sliding the envelope into his jacket, he opened the door on the ambulance and fell into Niall, as the floods behinds his emerald eyes began to flow once more.
"He..He...Hes Gone...." Harry muttered into Niall's shoulder, the silence was endless as all the boys stood there in shock, trying to calm Harry down not allowing their emotions to fully come out, guiding Harry back to his car, Liam drove him back as Zayn drove Niall in his car, converging back to Harry's apartment Harry ran upstairs shakily and ripped open the envelope that was sticking out of his Jacket, inside was a letter:

My Harold,
I'm not the best at writing, but of course you know that.
By the time you have read this, I, Louis William Tomlinson will no longer be here,
and I'm sorry that I left you, I truly, truly am,
But I couldn't take anymore of you not understanding, I tried to not cry when I hugged you goodbye for what would be the last time,
but hazza I gave you so many hints to how I feel, how I love your smile and how your dimples fit your face perfectly, how your eyes glisten, and your hair well, I'm already missing you deeply, but I guess you were just to young to understand Harry,
I tried 100 ways to say what was on my mind but every time it didn't work, I don't understand how or why I couldn't say three little words, I mean I know I did but I wish you understood that it wasn't in a brotherly way, but I just couldn't stand seeing you so happy with girls it broke me inside, I hope you realise now what I mean and if not now hopefully in the next 100 days, you will, beside our bed is my laptop case, in there is everything you'll need I promise, there's a book and my computer, read the first note in the book and that will explain what you must do, please follow it Harry, and for the last thing you said to me that I never answered, Yes, my beanie did look a lot better on you that it ever did on me. Please don't forget me Harry, I'll always be with you, I promise.
I Love you babyface
Lou xxx
 

Harry intently read the letter running his fingers over the familiar writing, sobbing as he did, blissfully unaware that Liam was behind him,
"You made him do this..." Liam's cracking voice spoke harshly "You didn't even know, but you, you killed him..." these words made Harry go in complete meltdown as he fell down to the floor staring at Liam not saying a word.


 

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