It must be a Thursday because I sit alone at Theo and I’s table. Thursday is Theo’s day off. I always look forward for Fridays and it is not the because of the super fun group baking its is because I love to hear of all the normal things Theo gets up to on her off day. Sometimes I dream of washing my own clothes, going to the corner store for food hell even miss sweeping the floor. Things I used to hate but would kill to be able to do again. Quiet settles in the lounge and I know something is wrong. Even Tasman who is always rocking in her chair has stopped to look. Three guards enter then he enters. His head is bowed just like the first time I saw him, only this time all sense of humour has vanished. He looks up scanning the room quickly. His face holds no emotion but he almost looks angry or scary I can’t quite tell. The guards disperse and Harry is left alone in the middle of the room looking angry and awkward. I feel a bit bad for him but I refuse to make eye contact in case he takes it as friendliness and I really don’t need a crazy killer friend because then they will most defiantly lock me up and throw away the key. Harry slumps at the table next to mine. I can see his chest rise and fall as he breathes. He uses his fingers to push around a game piece left out of it box. The rest of the room must have decided he wasn’t very interesting and went back to being nuts. Harry’s eyes catch mine. Shit I must really learn to stop staring. I can’t stop though, its like he is paralysing me with his eyes making it physically impossible for me to look away. He breaks into a smile and I am released from my hold. I look away quickly before he traps me again. I smile slightly at the table; I hope he knows it was meant for him. Ok so I don’t want to be his friend but I don’t want to ignore him either. Tasman must have shat her pants again or something because she started screaming and trying to cut her pants off with a playing card. Either way the rest of lounge time was over and we all got sent back to our cells. I tried to get some sleep because as it turns out being sedated can really knock you around but some inconsiderate bastard kept singing about Mary and her fucking little lamb so I lay facing the ceiling until sleep finally found me.
Therapy with Kelly turned out to be her talking about her theories of my illness. At least she didn’t bring up Philip so maybe Theo didn’t tell her. I rushed my shower so I could get to the lounge to hear about Theo’s day off. I sat and waited at our table for fifteen minutes and Theo still hadn’t shown up. I caught Stefan’s attention and he came over.
“Steph do you know where Theo is?” I ask sweetly
“She is stuck in her office with a misbehaving patient.”
A wave of sadness passes over me. Not because Theo is missing although that does suck but because I know ‘misbehaving patient’ is Stephan’s code for a patient that has been whipped or worse. My mind shudders at the thought. Electroshock therapy, I have never experienced it I don’t want to. I have seen what it does to them. It makes them like a shadow of the person they used to be like the lights are on but nobody is home. This fills my thoughts and I am vaguely aware when Harry takes Theo’s seat. Fuck. Looks like he wants a friend.
“Hi” Harry says simply. I nod and he sighs.
“Tom said you were different from the rest, that you could hold an actual conversation. Maybe he was wrong, you are just like all the others,” Harry says
“I am nothing like them,” I growl and he smiles. Great I gave him the reaction he was looking for. I can feel him staring.
“What?” I bark. For someone who is obviously desperate for friends he is making a bad first impression. I don’t care about the way his green eyes light up when he smiles. I don’t care for the dimples that grace his cheeks. I definitely do not care for the toned arms that the jumpsuit clings to but most of all I don’t like the way he lights up his cigarette it is not sexy at all. I lie to myself.
“Just admiring the view”
“Great a Casanova” I say sarcastically. Harry laughs
“What is your name beautiful?”
“My name is Vera, and don’t let David hear you say that he might get jealous” I giggle motioning towards a frail older man sitting in the corner staring at me. Harry’s eyes narrow at David. “What the fuck is he doing behind that chair?”
“Oh David is a chronic masturbator, started out just in the comfort of his own home in front of whores but then it escalated into the public arena. So now he just sits in the corner jacking off,” I explain
“But he is looking at you” He states “Does that not bother you?”
“Used to, I don’t really notice it anymore”
Harry’s face turns into one of disgust.
“So you know anyone else’s story?” he asks
“Hmm flirtatious and nosey”
Harry laughs slightly
“Well you see that bald man over there by the window?” Harry nods “He kept his wife and sister in law in his basement and used them for um his sexual releases whenever he pleased”
“So why isn’t he in prison? That doesn’t sound like insanity” Harry observes
“Well he seems to truly believe a demon possessed him to do so”
“Next” Harry says excitedly “What about the woman rocking in the corner?”
“Well her name is Rosalie. She used to be very beautiful, I seen her patient file. She is a sadist. Playtime went a bit far and he died whilst nailed to a cross. She was found trying to resolve peoples sins”
“She was playing god,” Harry states staring at the woman whilst she played with her hair.
“My turn to ask a question now” I say sitting up in my seat trying to appear taller
“Go on then” Harry nods
“Do you believe in god?”
Harry bursts into laughter causing staff to look at him.
“What is so funny” I frown
“You are” His laugh becoming quieter.
“You must be the only person who doesn’t want to know if I killed those woman or not.” His tone becoming serious.
“No a jury found you guilty already, why would I want an answer I already know?”
Harry leans in towards me and I find myself unable to back away.
“Do you though?”