This girl aged only 13 was dreading school that next year, dreading the abuse that came.
Remember how her only escape was music? Well, that was shredded when she got comments from her family saying that she couldn't sing or play well at all. This ruined her. She now had no escape and no way of dealing with what was eating her away inside. Her family where unaware as to all that happening to her, completely oblivious to everything that was said and done to her. They were completely oblivious to the fact that she was breaking inside, bit by bit crumbling away.
She remembered the first day of high school so vividly. Remember how the children treated this girl aged only 9? Well people grow stronger. People learn new tactics. Their hearts become more cruel and the hatred takes them over. But what did she ever do to them? Why did they treat her with such cruelty? Why?
That first day started well, the first few hours all ran smoothly with no harsh comments, she thought maybe they had moved on. But alas she was wrong. During class when this girl was sitting by herself at the back of the room they began to pass her notes. Everyone passed her notes. Each one said, "kill yourself." "You don't belong on this earth" "Fat bitch."
She flicked through them all just giving those people what they wanted. With every note that she read her decision to give them what they wanted became stronger. She came across a note which simply said, "they're wrong."
That person gave her hope. Thoughts of taking her own life came to a standstill even if it was for a moment. She thought that maybe someone cared for once.
Lunch bell signaled and she gathered her books throwing the notes in the bin on the way out. Half way through lunch was when it happened, she walked into the bathroom and saw a dozen of the most popular girls doing their hair and makeup. She tried backing out quietly but of course they saw her. In an instant she was thrown to the floor and was pinned down by fear. They taunted her letting colorful phrases of abuse drip from their mouths. Their perfectly manicured nails clawed at her skin leaving ugly marks down her arms and face, blood mixed with her tears.
They left not long after leaving this girl in a mess of inner battles, bruises and blood. She dragged herself into a stall and locked the door, letting all her her tears slip down her face silently. This girl sat in that stall for the two hours that followed the school day. No one noticed her absence, teachers didn't care, the students were too proud of their efforts to care.
Every so often this girl looked at her wrists, and saw the mutilated flesh and the ugly jagged scars coating the once untouched skin.
The glimmer of hope she got from that message now faded, all she had left was self hatred. She wasn't worth anyone's time, everyone hated her, they wanted her gone, they wanted her out of their lives. Well, if anything she was capable of that. Her decision was made.