I wake before Scott and quickly slip out of bed. I don't want him to wake up with me in his arms. I don't want to be vulnerable around him. Neither of us deserves that after last night. I walk slowly over to the wardrobe and pull open the drawers below it to retrieve my clothes. This could’ve been the last time I wake in this room. It's a weird thought.
"Evelyn." Scott's tired voice speaks up behind me. I stop what I'm doing immediately.
"I- I have to go." I stutter before walking quickly to the door.
"Please. We should talk." He sounds calm, maybe even compassionate? No! I can't deal with this now!
"I'm sorry. I-" I exit the room quickly, cutting off the sentence that I didn't even know the end of.
I fall against the wall outside and slide down it slowly until I'm am sat awkwardly on the floor. This is too much. I love him. That much I know is true. I love him with all of my heart. But I don't deserve him. I don't deserve the X-Men. He's right, I am irresponsible. But that's never going to change. I will always choose the safety of my friends over hiding my mutant abilities. I will always do what I believe is right, even if Scott disagrees. I will always be my own person, not tied down to a team like the X-Men. The main point being, no, I'm not really an X-Man at all. They don't want me with them anymore than I want to obey Scott's every order. I mess things up. They must see that by now? I sigh heavily. What am I going to do?
The door opens beside me and Scott steps out, stopping as soon as he notices me.
"I-" his voice is weak. He clears his throat before continuing with a stronger, harsher tone. "I'm going to class. You should probably go back to bed."
"No, I'll come with you." I say forcefully.
"But you need to-" he stops himself. That's right, Cyclops. You're not my leader or my boyfriend anymore! You can't order me around. "Fine."
I stand and start off down the hall, not giving Scott the opportunity to catch up. With me walking at such a pace, we reach the classroom in no time.
"Ah, Evelyn." The professor speaks up as I enter the room. "It’s nice to see you back in class."
"Yeah, I got fed up of bed rest a while ago." I mumble as a dig at Scott's recent actions and rules.
"Do take a seat." He gestures kindly to the selection of seats before him, three of which are already taken up by the other X-Men. I quickly select the seat next to Warren, pointedly placing my hand on his leg, before glancing up at Scott, whose eyes are locked on mine as he takes the seat next to Jean.
Class passes quickly, even though most of it felt like a battle between me and Scott. It was like a challenge to see who could make the other more jealous. I'd bite my lip and whisper things to Warren, whilst subtly running my hands over his body. Scott, however, took the more considered approach of doing things to Jean that he knows I love. He would brush locks of hair from her face, flash her 'that smile'... Ugh! It was disgusting!
"You're so pathetic." I whisper to him as I pass his chair when leaving the room.
"Evelyn..." He sighs and stands, following me quickly.
"No." I say simply, holding up my hand to silence him as I head down the long corridor to our- his- room. I need to pick up my stuff. I'm moving back home tonight - my first step in alienating myself completely from the X-Men. Still, he follows me, nearly jogging to catch up. "Go away, Scott!"
"No! No, I've got something I need to say." He doesn't sound angry. He sounds... Scared?
"I don't want to hear it." I hiss bluntly, pushing the door to his room open roughly.
"I give up!" He yells, and I hear the footsteps behind me come to an abrupt stop. "I want you to know, I give up now."
He gives up? On us? On me? The hurt blooms in my chest. I stop and look back at him for the first time.
"Wh- What do you mean?" Damn it! I can't look weak now! He begins to walk towards me slowly, as if I'm a fragile woodland creature that could scamper at any moment.
"I mean," he reaches me and I can't stop myself looking up at him. Why don't I push him back? Why don't I walk away? "I give up pretending that I can move on. I can't, Evelyn. Pretending to feel for Jean the same way I feel for you... I can't- I couldn't- You're different."
"Great," I say sarcastically, regaining my sassy attitude. Yes! "I'm going to kiss Warren goodbye before I move out officially."
He tenses at the mention of Warren's name. I resist the urge to smile at his actions.
"Don't lie to me, Evelyn. Don't tell me you feel for him what you feel for me!" His voice is stronger now. The many recent incidents surrounding Warren seem to have made him sort of sensitive to the mutant's name.
"I-" Of course I don't, Scott, I could never love anyone like I love you. I don't let me thoughts escape - that would be weak. "I don't know how I feel. I need to get to know him more intimately."
"That answer proved I'm right. And the fact that the idea of you 'knowing him intimately' makes me feel physically sick, shows that I feel just as much - if not more - for you." He takes my hands in his and I pull them away immediately.
"Scott, I'm not- We're too different. You don't understand how I'm feeling about this whole thing." My voice softens again.
"Actually, I think I do." He somehow steps even closer. "We need to talk."
**Will they get back together? Or is this the end of Evelyn’s journey with Scott and the X-Men? These chapters have been especially challenging, but hopefully I’ll be getting back into more interesting action scenes soon. Keep commenting!**