Holding My Breath

This is the second movella in the series, to read the first one go to:
:D Sorry about the bad grammar! :D Hope you enjoy


15. Call me a sinner

Quinn couldn’t stop crying, Mom was so worried about Rachael that I felt bad for her instead of Rachael. Rachael was tired, laying on the couch looking defeated.

That woman terrifies me” she whispered to me when we got just enough privacy that I could hug her.

“We saw you do so many cool tricks in the arena, why didn’t you do it here?” Crish asked and walked back and forth while Dad tried to keep Quinn calm.

Her voice was sore from yelling, and screaming. “If I had tried anything… and she would have felt… threaten she would have killed one of you”.

Crish kept walking back and forth. Mom came back with a cold cloth dipped in water. Rachael used it to wash the black spots off.

“Can you get it out?” I asked her.

“It doesn’t matter” She answered “It’s not poisonous”

She couldn’t stop shaking though. I could see she tried to hold up her guards, but she couldn’t help it.

“I don’t know what she would do here…” The guard noticed “It doesn’t make sense”

“Actually it does” Rachael answered “But it doesn’t matter right now… you need to do your job, and report this” Bramai looked at her, then sighed. “I guess you are right”

He left not soon after – Vergile kept talking about us not being protected enough, Rachael didn’t mind it, she seemed so tired that she could sleep for a thousand years. But she didn’t close her eyes to sleep. After the experience, Mom and Crish got Quinn to sleep before going to bed themselves. Vergile then followed their example and so did his wife. At last it was just us. She was just sitting and staring out into the air.

“I hope you don’t mind” She noticed suddenly “Jeremy wants to check on me-“

I bit my lip. “I guess it’s only fair” She didn’t smile, but seemed rather distant. The door opened and closed, before a cloaked person entered the room.

“Come here” The voice where sincere and warm. He made her stand up, and then hugged her. I could hear whispers, but not what they said. Their voices got louderæ “Don’t worry, you are stronger than she’ll ever be”

“Only naturally” She answered “She is using dark magic-“

“I know” His hands went around her and hugged her again. “But dark magic is nothing against a beautiful mind like yours”

Rachael sighed and sat down again.

“I better go now” He started to leave the living room “Your marking is going great so far!”

He left the house and the door closed.

I wanted to hold her close and tell her everything will be alright, but I don’t know anything about our situation. Yes we are now together, and alone, but somehow I feel watched.


Jaime tells…

I was with dad at dinner when we got the news.

Dad was sitting at the end of the table like always, and the guard Bramai got in. He is the one always following her around.

“An hour ago” He started “The noble Simone entered the house of the lighter Adrian’s. It turned out it wasn’t the Noble… but in fact… The dark lighter Maria. Somehow she managed to hold the lighter family and myself up against the walls of their house, while tormenting The noble Rachael”

We stared at dad, who looked shocked.

“Is she okay?” My oldest brother asked.

Bramai nodded. “She is a bit shocked, but she is fine. Maria injected a liquid into her palms and under her feet – and once on her forehead, but Rachael herself said it isn’t poison”

“And the lighter Family?” Dad asked.

“They are all fine. Maria was only interested in The noble Rachael”

Dad sighed and made him go.


Tyler tells…

After we got the news that she was attacked, I have felt useless. Her dad is angry and frustrated – he flipped a giant table, when he got the news.

Jeremy had to go check on her.

“She is close to going into shock” He told me, “She needs someone to help her get through this”.

Then he left me here, feeling useless. I really miss her, and my friends, and our old life. I’m not sure what would happen if I lost her.


Bramai tells…

When I got back I couldn’t stop smiling. Adrian had somehow made her calm down, and made her fall asleep. She was laying with an arm around his, and leaning her head on his shoulder. He made me go quietly in, and we decided not to move her – she barely sleeps, and this must have killed her last energy.

Adrian fell asleep during night, and I could barely hold myself a wake.


I woke up to the smell of pancakes. Rachael wasn’t on the sleeping Adrian’s arm anymore, I got up and started looking.

She wasn’t in her room, or the bathroom or the kitchen.

“She is outside” One of the mothers told me “She needed some fresh air”.

I opened the door to outside, and she had been right. She was laying on the grass smiling for herself.

“Sorry if I worried you” She told me, as I walked out “But it’s nice to be alone now and then” I laughed and sat down.

“You don’t have a lot of alone time, do you?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “I had when I was little”

“You did?” Everything I heard about her have made me think differently.

“Yeah” She started to smile “As soon as I got tired of training and reading I would hide from everyone. The first few times they got really worried, but then they realized I needed it…. So they let me do it. They knew I would always come home sooner or later”.

I tried seeing a little sweet girl in the middle of all the horror I have always been told the dark life would be like.

“You… you should get ready” I noticed.

“You’re right” She got up and walked inside. We saw her twenty minutes later, looking like a dream again. She didn’t need breakfast, and just wanted to get it over with.


Jaime tells…

The kingdom was sitting on edges. They couldn’t wait to hear her play, and somehow I just needed to know she was alright.

When she walked in, she reminded me of a girl that needs saving. For the first time she looked nervous. She was wearing a green dress, with gold jewelry. I looked exactly like the one yesterday.

“Before we start” Dad said when she reached the Jem “I heard yesterday that you were attacked?”

“Yes” She answered without blinking.

“And that a liquid was injected into you?” Dad asked once more, she took a deep breath and nodded.

“Do you have any knowledge about this liquid?”

Rachael nodded once.

“What does it do?”

Rachael took a deep breath. “As a ferike, I have been taught since birth too make mental blockades, and break others down. The poison she injected in me… it breaks some of them down. I already checked… if she uses her powers to try and take over my mind she will fail”

Rachael started to smile again. “If she tries to look through my memories….

She will fail”

But then the smile stopped “But she will be able to use my voice… and if she can break one last wall down… my arm”

“Does this make you more dangerous?” Dad asked. I stared at him in shock. Is that what he is worried about? WHAT ABOUT HER?

“No” She answered.

“If she uses your magic-“

“She can’t” Rachael answered “To take my magic she would have to control my mind, and I would rather die than let her do that” I could hear truth in her words. I bit my lip.

“That’s all” Dad noticed and pointed at the piano “Whenever you’re ready”.

She walked to the piano and took a deep breath. She looked nervous. She started to play, and the music was sad… and lonely. I felt bad and wanted to hug her.

“Why don’t you try singing?” Dad asked her.

“I don’t know the lighter version of the song”

“Sing it in human”

She stopped and started over.

“Wrap me in a bolt of lightning, send me on my way, still smiling” Her voice sounded so sad. But her face was all neutral. Maybe she is scared of performing this?

“Maybe that’s the way I should go… Straight into the mouth of the unknown”

She kept singing, loud and clear.

“Call me a sinner, call me a saint, tell me it’s over, I’ll still love you the same. Call me your favorite, call me the worst”

I felt so bad. Suddenly she stopped, looking at the piano but then she continued. Like she needed a short break.

“You healed my heart and my life-“ She stopped again and looked at her arm, her left was all stretched out. A chain and cuffs came around it. It wouldn’t be able to move, and it was attached to the floor. Did she do that to herself? She kept signing and playing, it still sounded good, even though she lost some notes here and there.

You can’t restrain me” her voice got deep and creepy.

“You are right, but only because you won’t be in my body for long” Rachael’s own voice sounded relaxed, her fingers on the right hand kept playing.

You are a fool if you think you can compete with me!”

“You are the fool” She answered “I know more of mind control than you ever will”

That’s impossible. I will live forever and learn more about it than you ever will”

The chain around her hand disappeared, and the hand held around her neck.

“Don’t do stupid things Maria” Rachael answered cold “Killing me would only provoke my dad further”

I have no intention of killing you like this. If you kill one innocent, you will get executed

Rachael started to smile. “You can’t use my magic. How are you going to kill anyone?”

“By making you insane”

Rachael started to laugh aloud, and eventually had to hold around her own mouth to make her stop.

“What is so funny?”

“The fact that you think you can make me insane” Rachael answered smilingly.

Enough time spend in someone’s brain, makes them insane”

“No Maria. That is not how it works”

Rachael started to smile once more, her hand kept playing the melody over and over again.

It works on my minions”

“You do something wrong then” Rachael answered “My protector is most of the time in my brain, and he isn’t anymore insane than I am”

“It doesn’t matter. You will kill someone, someone light”

Rachael started to smile. “You are aware of how mind control works, right?”

What are you talking about?”

“You are trying right now to tear down my walls. My walls burns uninvited intruders” Rachael answered “And I have heard it hurts like hell. Besides from that, if you try to kill me I will do the same to you”

The guards had taking positions around her, and people had been moved to the back. Dad and I were heavily guarded.

That’s impossible”

“To go into another person’s brain, require you let down your own guards. Didn’t you know that? Right now I can control your arm as well, but you haven’t noticed it, have you?”

You could see the grip on the left arm had gotten worse.

“And if I apply magic on my own body” She got lifted up into the air. You could see the grip getting tidier and tidier.

You are going to kill us

“I have nothing to lose right now” Rachael smiled. You could see her wind magic was holding her up. She wasn’t dying right now.

Let go of my hand”

“Leave my body then” Rachael answered “I give you ten seconds, if you don’t leave my body, both of us will die”

The magic that held her up disappeared, now it was her own arm only – she is killing herself.

“10” Her feet was moving back and forth like she was trying to find ground. “9”


The silence had spread completely.

I will make you insane” The voice was hoarse and tired.


“If I destroy every wall at once”


I wanted to run to her, jump up and pull her down to earth. I want her to survive.

“GAAAAAAAH” She was screaming, for a second only. Then she started to laugh while barely being able to breath.


Why didn’t it work?”

“I rebuilt my walls, 4”

The pains was incredible, you should be insane”

“3, You forget to look around you. I’m currently in the air, trying to kill myself, just to get you out of my body”

She was starting to cough loudly.

I see, you are already insane”

“2, last chance to leave”

A second of silence went by, while nothing happen. “One”

The grip was gone, but so was she. She fell to the ground, hitting the piano, making a giant row of cracking noises.

The guards were the first to come near her. They checked her pulse. “Barely alive, but alive” One of them called out, and the healers came running in. They took her out of here, and dad and I had to help the people calm down.


Dad and I found her after that. It seemed like she just needed sleep, but at the same time wanted to be up and around.

“Hehe” She laugh when we saw her. She was smiling proudly.

“She left my body” She told us “At the second things started to turn dark”

Dad took a deep breath. “You said you wouldn’t endanger the people”

She looked at my dad with a smile. “I didn’t”

Dad started to school her, she listened with a smile, and when he was done, she just shrugged her shoulders, telling him that she didn’t mind traumatizing the people: “The need some truth once in a while, something to wake them up”

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