I hadn't slept at all in about 30 hours. Even though I was practically dragging myself into the bathroom, I was gonna do it. For real this time. No turning back. I grabbed a small bottle of pills from my medicine cabinet in my bathroom. Before I did that, I took out one of my favourite razors. It was one from a scalpel that I found in the hospital once. I swiped along my right arm with the scalpel blade multiple times before I was satisfied. Blood was dripping onto the floor. But I didn't care. I cut once more. A long vertical line, from the top of my forearm, to my wrist; slashing through most of the smaller cuts. I went slowly, making sure I hit deep, but not deep enough to hit a vein. I took a deep breath and turned to the medicine cabinet. I emptied the contents of the pill bottle into my hand and clasped tightly onto it. I took a swig of water from my bottle and sat still. I loosened my grip and tilted my head back. My hand formed as a little funnel and as soon as all the pills were in, I gulped down some more water to help the pills get through. Immediately, the mass amount of pills started taking effect. Just then, my only friend (and legal guardian), Aidan, came back home from the airport. He just flew back from France for a trip. I heard footsteps coming up and tried my best to keep quiet. But instead, my body, being the shittiest body ever, decided to give up and I fell back and hit my head on the bathtub. So Aidan heard me and ran into my room to find me. He found me on the floor with the medicine cabinet open and everything spilled out. Aidan lifted me up, over the toilet-bowl and stuck two finger down my throat. At that point, I was already half-dead. But I started gagging and a few seconds later, the pills spewed out of my mouth. He turned on the water from the shower-head and pulled himself into it, with me on his lap. My face was drained of energy and whatever I was thinking of before Aidan turned up was gone. He held me there while a rush of lukewarm water cascaded onto our weary faces. I coughed once and he held me tighter. His arms wrapped around my waist and I put my left hand on his. He started crying. And I knew because he slumped his head into the crook of my neck. His brown-now-black hair was drooping and so were the corners of his pale lips. A great silence erupted, except for the rain-like noises of the water gushing out of the shower head. Aidan was now humming "Forever and Always" by Parachute. It was one of my favourite songs. I would listen to it all day. Even if I didn't have a reason to. And I would blast it in my room, on full volume. Aidan wouldn't mind if I did. As he got to the last two lines of the song, he had began singing, inaudibly with his chin perched onto my shoulder.
"Please just remember even if I'm not there,
I'll always love you, forever and always"