Subject- Just saying hi!
It's me, Colin! I just wanted to say hey, and ask when we could have a play date????!!!!! Like, maybe tonight? Or tomorrow? Or the next day? Or the day after that? Or maybe the day following that day? The sooner the better, BHFFTROEBIHS. So yeah. What should we do? Maybe we could go chase some unicorns on our brooms, or maybe we could go exploring in forbidden corridors and save the day, like you did last year!!!!!!!!! Why aren't you talking to me??? I keep approaching you, and you keep walking away! That is SO not how you should treat your BHFFTROEBIHS!!!! Anyways, I know that it might be because of that jerk, Ronald, who's been bugging you. Maybe we can find a way to get him to leave you alone. And that annoying girl with the frizzy brown hair. Hermione. She's such a know-it-all! Don't you agree?
With love, Your BHFFTROEBIHS, Colin Carol Creevy
Subject- Hello, my love
Susan, my love,
Are you free for a date tonight? You, me, and Harry Potter, my BHFFTROEBIHS? It'll be a blast!!!!! I know you're totally excited! You have a broom, right? We're going unicorn watching! I can get you a broom if you don't have one! I don't have very much that I don't want to say to you in person, so sincerely from your FHWALYSM (future husband who already loves you so much), Colin Carol Creevy
Bcc- firstname.lastname@example.org, email@example.com
Please do not contact me again. I don't want to go unicorn watching with you, and I like Hermione and Ron. They're my best friends, and you aren't. Leave me alone.
Please stop stalking me! I don't know you, and frankly, you're starting to scare me. Please, please leave me alone!!!
To- firstname.lastname@example.org, email@example.com
YOU FREAKS! BACK OFF OF MY BHFFTROEBIHS! with love, Colin Carol Creevy
Colin: I realize that Harry is a very interesting wizard, and it makes perfect sense for you to want to be his friend, but I must warn you; being friends with Harry Potter is very dangerous. Worth it, all the same, but dangerous. And I'm not sure he appreciates you stalking him. Anyway, what we do has threatened our lives many times. So in the odd chance that you do become friends with Harry, you could die. Or worse... be Expelled!
You're the stalker kid, right? Harry hates you! No point in trying! Like Hermione said, he doesn't appreciate being stalked.