The Far Side

You always hear about teenage girls and their perfect men, falling madly in love and living happily ever after. But what of us teenage boys? Do we not get a lovely romance tale? Well, I did. Some places I wouldn't call it lovely, and in others I would call it pure bliss. And trust me, if you think you women have it rough and find it hard to find the love of your life, then wait till you hear my story. For guys, it's a lot different!


1. Me. This is the New Me

Wow! Year 11! I'm top of the school now. I'm the oldest year in the entire school. I always looked up to year 11's with envy thinking
"Caw! I wanna be in year 11! Boss people around, the teachers treat you with respect; Ah, that's the life..."

~ (Note: To Americans reading this, year 11 in England is like 10th grade.) ~

But now I'm here, - ummm - it's not as great as I thought it would be. I mean, yeah the teachers treat you with more respect but the 'bossing people around part', not so much. Since I'm not one of the "popular" guys around my year. I'm not an outcast! No, no! I'm just not one of the "cool" people; you know the lads with big muscles and flashy hair. And the girls with 1,209 friends on facebook, and then they end up sending a picture of their tits to a boy and suddenly, everybody knows about it. I'm in between, still have friends who will hold me till the end of time but I still get bullied from time to time.

Well, bullying has never been a problem for me after I came into year 11. From year 7 to year 9, I was cannon fodder for a whole bunch of kids! I was nerdy, weird and had anger issues that boiled my blood to lava. It wasn't nice... But in year 10, I grew thick skin for those twats, pinging off each of there comments and insults like armor on a tank. They would say

"Hey look it's Tana! Careful, he'll lick you like a window!" and I used to reply with

"No I won't... just go die in a ditch..." and this would fuel them. Making them attack me with more insults until I blew up with pointless rage. And after that, they would keep going. Only till I balled my eyes out did they stop, and strolled off in remorse. But I learned. I learned the hard way but I learned none the less. Now, with the new me, I would reply

"Oooo! I'd lick you any day!" just making me look more like a fool, however they left me alone. And as time grew, friends started to sprout like flowers. Social intercourse is a strange martial art isn't it? First I'm a dorky kid who reacts to insults like poison, to a kid who actually has friends who laugh at my weird gags. Some of which are girls! *shock-horror!*


Speaking of girls, never had a girlfriend really... never fancied one either. Nerdy Tana didn't like girls, he saw them as the enemy! (Jesus, no wonder I was lame kid. If I could, I would travel back in time just to punch old Tana!) But now I'm talking to more girls, I understand them a little bit more, but every man knows they will never fully understand women. They are alien to us. Yet the men who THINK they know women are usually the ones putting

"byeee! Love you! xxxx <3 <3 <3" when saying their farewells in a text messaging session with any girl; even if they aren't going out. If they go out then it's fine but if it's just to a friend, best friend or just a new girl they met, then blegh! They're dick heads in my opinion. Thinking they know women from head to toe yet they know crap all. Since most of my friends who are girls think they are spastics too.

All this is going to make this year a great one like the 'legends' say. I can feel it.

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