Everything I believed was wrong.
One week before.
"Go to hell!" My sister shouted at me as I felt the air slam in my face, as well as her door, covered in posters.
"Well screw you then." I mumbled to myself, walking into my bedroom on the landing, shutting the door behind me, I only asked her what's wrong, can she blame me for caring?
I threw myself onto my cold bed wondering what I should spend my few hours of 'freedom' doing. My eyes soon found themselves staring at my small, grey, covered-in-stickers TV. I put my TV on and started watching The Big Bang theory - that's when I heard it.
'Please let me go!' A voice shouted at the top of their lungs.
'Shut up!' The sound of my sisters voice replied. I quickly fumbled for my remote to turn the sound down.
What the hell?
I quickly opened my door and stared in the direction of my sisters. I hesitated and then went up to her door and opened it, dreading the worst.
Silence fell upon us.
I was staring at a boy from my school in my sister year. His hands were tightly bound behind his back, so tight you could see where in his arms the blood seemed to stop. His tears were real, and so was the blood, it wasn't fake, although I wished it was.
I wish all of it was.
"Run!" The boy shouted at me, caring more for me than himself. Blood dripped from his mouth, he started coughing leaving a mark on her pale carpet. I stared at my sister.
"Why-" I started to ask, almost too shell-shocked to speak.
"She told me what she's planning, run!" He continued.
The sharp blade my sister was holding, already covered in the boys blood, then went through his chest and made a positive cracking sound, well to her anyway.
I was speechless.
I found it hard to get the words out of my mouth. "What?-"
"I suggest you keep your mouth shut." My sister said sharply.
"Why would you-"
"Because no one was holding me back." She answered.
"How long have you been doing this?" I asked, my voice shaken.
"Ages." She snapped back.
I always knew my sister had an anger problem, as did I a few years back, but I would never of expected this. I then made eye contact again, then sprinted.
I ran downstairs and grabbed my phone. My eyes scanned the screen for the word 'Mum'. It rang- I could hear it, it was upstairs.
"I'm sorry, this person is dead." My sister told me, seeming completely serious, then hanging up.
It was so sudden, I thought she had just gone to the shops.
It was like someone had just crushed my world into tiny little pieces and turned it into everything I never wanted it to be.
Am I dreaming? I must be dreaming.
My fingers kept on pressing the wrong buttons on my phone, which made me panic and make even more mistakes, my tears falling onto the screen didn't help either. I managed to send a mass text to a few of the people on my contacts, which included all of my group of friends, to call the police.
I couldn't make that call, because she was behind me.
I could see her shadow over me just watching until I noticed, like something out of paranormal activity.
"I'm not gonna hurt you." My sister smiled.
"You're not?" I asked back.
"Why would I? Your not going to text people for help, oh wait, you did."
"If you want to keep this a secret then fine. I won't tell anyone." I told her, trying not to suddenly shout for help.
"It's a bit too late." She said looking down at my phone.
"I'll say it's a false alarm." I told her.
"Do it." She commanded. I quickly unlocked my phone and did as she said.
"Go to your room." - I didn't hesitate. I half ran to my room, shutting my door, burying myself in my light purple checkered duvet and pillow. I was surprised she didn't take my phone off me or tell me what will happen if I do make contact with someone about it but I guess the message got across.
I didn't go to sleep that night, my body was still shaking and my eyes were sore from rubbing them too much. I was so scared, I was already gaining paranoia, I'd never been in a situation like this, but I was afraid I would have to get used to the feeling.
I did, and I buried it along with love.
My eyes stared at the door as it opened, this is what I had been dreading the whole night. My sister was in her school uniform, I wasn't, I had no intention of leaving the house, not today.
"Good sleep?" My sister asked in a kind of friendly way. I didn't answer. "Fine, you want anything?" She asked.
I then got up and was about to walk out my door. "Where do you think your going?"
"To the kitchen." I answered.
"I asked you, what do you want. If you want food I'll get it." My sister told me.
"I'd rather go down myself thanks." I didn't dare make eye contact, I just kept on looking down. I walked passed her and managed to make it to the kitchen. Without any hesitation, knowing exactly what I was doing, I went to the cupboard, got my box of cereal and poured it into one of the clean looking bowls on the side. I then got a slightly bent spoon, like all of them, out of the draw and sat at the kitchen table.
My sister was watching my every move, she then came and sat on the opposite side of the table, almost face to face. I loaded my spoon full of cookie crisp and shoved it into my mouth, trying not to cause conversation.
"I'm sorry if I scared you-"
"You killed Mum." I interrupted.
"You know why." My sister told me.
"She wasn't like her."
"She could've been." My sister told me in a more confident voice, remembering that she's now the one in control. I finished my small portion of breakfast and pushed the bowl aside.
When I was eight and my sister was ten my real mum was still alive. We never used to be like the people in the family photographs you see in people's houses or in printing shops, we still aren't. We were never perfect, then again, who is? We never used to go on outings or go to family reunions, my mum and dad would just sit in front of the TV getting drunk, I used to think that was the norm. Both me and my sister used to always go our separate ways and never really talked much.
Almost as if she had something to hide.
I would always just go out to the park, even at that young of age my parents didn't care, they never did. The worst was what happened to my sister. I used to always hear shouting coming from her room, but I never used to take that much notice as there had always been shouting and I had just got used to it, it never seemed to be anything too serious......but abuse is. My sister hid it from me, scared that I would end up getting hurt in the crossfire, my sister always cared for me, but I don't know anymore. My mum would be drunk, get angry and simply just start hurting her with whatever she had in mind. Long story short, my mum died of cancer, caused by drinking and smoking and whatever else she used to do in her spare time. My dad was then useless. He felt like he needed something to fill the gap he now had in his life, which was a new wife. My sister, Rita, had always been scared that our new mum would turn out the same, but luckily that never happened. After two years of a happy marriage my dad soon died of a stroke and my new mum was found to pick up the pieces, including us.
But now she's dead. Everyone's dead.
"You not going to school?" My sister asked me. I shook my head. "Then go back up to your room."
"No." I answered.
"What was that?" She asked in a louder tone.
"I said no. Get used to it." I told her trying to regain my own confidence.
"Do you think this is funny?" She asked me standing up, leaning over the table.
"Who's laughing?" I questioned back. I then noticed the small pen knife sticking out the sleeve of her school jumper. "I thought you said you weren't going to hurt me." I told her looking down at the knife. "The boy said you had plans, what plans?" I asked.
She thought about her answer for a number of seconds. "Go back upstairs."
"Go back upstairs!" She shouted back at me. "Or do you wanna get hurt?" I then quickly got up, slammed my chair against the table, putting it back, and quickly tried to open the front door. That's when she came up to me and grabbed me. "Let go of me!' I told her in a not shouting but loud voice, but she wasn't listening. She made sure I wouldn't be able to escape whilst she got a syringe out of her trouser pocket and slowly injected it into my shoulder. I collapsed instantly, whacking my head on the door handle.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
"You in there?!" I heard a voice shout as I lifted my head. I felt the bruise from where I fell, it was a sort of pounding. "Yeah?" I answered, still trying to get my brain to start working again. I was laying on the floor in the middle of my bedroom. I glared up at my clock, lunchtime? I asked myself remembering that, for me, it was the beginning of the day a minute ago. "Why is your door locked?" The voice asked. I soon realised who it was, Keelin.
"Um, there should be a key on top of the door frame." I told her as I heard the lock turn and saw the door open. "Kaden, why is the door locked and why are you laying on the floor?" She asked.
I ignored her question. "Why are you here?" I asked in a friendly way.
"I got your text yesterday about 'calling the police', and then the 'don't worry' text followed seconds after it. Then you weren't at school so I thought I'd see if you were alright."
"I need to get out of here." I said as I went to my wardrobe, put a pair of light blue jeans on over my leggings, which I slept in, slipped on a pair of black plimsoll-like shoes on with dark red laces and my black hoodie. "Why?" Keelin asked me.
"I'll tell you in a minute." I told her as we walked out of my bedroom, locking the door behind me.
We soon found ourselves walking to her house, which wasn't to far away."So why?" She asked again.
"My sister." I answered plainly.
"Care to elaborate?" She asked intrigued.
"She killed my mum, killed a boy from school, I don't know who else, but......I don't know if she wants to hurt me, for my sake I hope not."
"WHAT? Is this some kind of joke?" She suddenly spoke up.
"No. Why would I go to the trouble of lying about this?" I asked.
"I'm calling the police." She told me as she got out her phone. "Why didn't you?"
"She was in the house the whole time, she would of heard it." I told Keelin.
"She wasn't there when I came."
"I tried to get out and she drugged me, that's why I was laying on the floor, you woke me up."
I told her. Keelin held the phone to her ear. "Hello?" A woman's voice asked.
"Um, my friend-"
"Hello?" The woman repeated.
"Can you hear me?" Keelin asked her.
"Hello?" She asked one last time.
Then the call ended.
"What was that about?" I asked, Keelin looked stressed.
"My phone's got no signal, and its running out of charge." She told me.
"It's ok, we can get to your house." I told her, Keelin nodded.
We were virtually already there, luckily for us, no one was home meaning we wouldn't get a lecture from an adult. I was looking at the cream coloured walls as Keelin went straight to the house phone, typed in the three digit number, and- nothing happened. Her house phone was also wireless. She went to the dock that it usually sits in- all the wires had been cut.
"She knows we're here." I said in quiet voice, gaining a shiver going up my spine.
Keelin looked down at her mobile, the screen was flashing, it read 'incoming call: Kaden'. "I bet all my money that she took your phone." Keelin told me.
"Yeah, you want me to answer it?" I asked, holding my hand out, not knowing what answer I would like best.
"Nah it's ok." She answered, holding it up to her ear, I could just about make out what my sister was saying. "Hello?" Keelin asked.
"Is there a reason why you're interfering?" My sisters voice asked.
"Interfering with what?"
"My plans." My sister explained.
"Why are you doing this?" Keelin asked wondering the multiple answers that could be thrown at her. "That's none of your business." She continued. "Pass me over to Kaden."
I held the phone in my hand, my palm sweaty.
"What do you want?" I asked.
"Come back." She told me.
"How did you even know I was gone, school hasn't finished yet."
"You really think I went to school?" My sister asked me as if I was stupid, not that I could disagree. "Anyway, you think I would come back after-"
"I was just scared that you would tell someone, please, I won't hurt you, I promise."
It took me a couple seconds to think about what I should answer with. "How can I trust you?"
"You used to trust me." My sister pointed out, reminding me of my past.
"..........Fine, but if anything like that happens again, then I promise you that everyone will know."
"Okay." My sister said lightly as she hung up.
"You're not really going back there-" Keelin started.
"I believe her when she makes promises."
"Why?" Keelin asked confused.
"When we were little she used to always tell me that she would look after me, and she has." I explained.
"Yeah, up to the part where she drugged you and locked you in your room."
"-Because she was scared." I quickly responded.
"I'm guessing you don't want me to tell anyone-"
"No, but if you don't hear from me in an hour then do what you want."
"Okay." Keelin agreed.
"Thanks." I said as I walked out the door.
I walked out into the rain, which had only just started. I did my hoodie up and put the hood over my head, hoping I wouldn't get too cold.
I was dreading going back but before I saw what she was doing I did trust her, but that's just one thing, it shouldn't change my entire opinion.
It should, and I shouldn't of gone back.
I was approaching my house, although it didn't seem the same, not after all my parents were dead, not after what she's done.
I walked in and shut the door behind me. In a way I wanted to be quiet and make it seem like I wasn't there but what was the point in that? I walked around the bottom floor of my house which included the Kitchen and the lounge which is joined onto our dining room, making it one room. I was wondering if Rita was downstairs, but no. I carefully went up the stairs, not daring to turn any lights on.
I was on the landing, I could hear talking. I slowly walked up to my sisters room and opened the door. "You could knock." My sister told me.
"Yeah I could, who's this?" I asked. I was looking at two girls, around the same age as my sister, one with long dark brown hair, the other black.
"This is Regina and Bec." Rita told me, not really caring. "Tell me, what did you promise me yesterday?"
I was silent for a while, already working out how this conversation would end. "I promised you I wouldn't tell anyone."
"And did you?" My sister asked. I knew that she already knew the answer because Keelin asked her why she she was doing this.
I wanted to say no and I wanted her to believe it, but she would see right through me, she always has. Finally I said it: "yes."
"There's me thinking we can get along fine, we can be like any normal family for once but you have to go and ruin it."
"You think I ruined it? You're the psycho!" I shouted at her.
"Your the one that never helped me when mum was beating me, you're the one who let me down."
"Your the one who kept it a secret." I told her.
"Couldn't you hear my screams? Didn't that make you want to go help me, surely that was never normal, even for us."
"I was eight."
"When do I care about what age you where? You're still you, you could of made that decision to help me instead of letting it scar me."
"And you think inflicting that on me is going to help you?!"
"What the hell happened to you?" I asked her.
"You." She replied. I took one step towards the door. "Where are you going?" She asked me.
"Like I'm gonna stay here with you." I told her as I rushed out the door. In my head all I was doing was having a go at myself asking the same question over and over again - 'why the hell did you come back? You knew that she isn't really your sister anymore.'
I could hear her behind me, slowly catching up. My heart rate got faster, wondering what in hell I should do. I got to the door.
"How?" I mumbled.
"You took your time looking round the house." Regina told me, coming down the stairs, following my sister.
"Now. You gonna come with us or do we have to do it the hard way?" My sister asked with a sarcastic smile on her face, happy that this time had come.
"I'm not going with you anywhere." I told her.
"It's not like you can stand up to us, so tell me, what you gonna do?"
"Nothing. Well, not now anyway."
My sister looked puzzled. "What do you mean by that?"
"Keelin knows about you, I told her if she didn't hear from me an hour after I left then she can tell whoever she likes."
"Is that supposed to be a threat?" My sister laughed.
"No. You see, I'm not like you, I'm not a bloodthirsty psychopath."
"You keep telling me that all you want, It won't save you and I know inside your screaming, but you haven't even seen the worst of me yet, so I think you should stop while you're ahead."
That's when I realised I was too confident. I punched her in the face, you can guess where that led- I got tied up in the basement.
I was surrounded by people, dead people.
My mum, the boy from school and a load of other people that I recall being seen on 'missing' posters and on the news.
I was trying to keep my tears in even though it wouldn't really matter, I just didn't want to be seen as weak, not this time.
She was standing in front of me.
"I've been looking forward to this for a long time....." My sister and her friends came closer to me. "You have a problem, you know that don't you!" My sister quickly grabbed my throat.
"Listen here, I'm doing what I want to do and so are they, we've killed people before, it's not like you're any different."
Bec passed Rita a knife, she smiled, then wrote her name on my arm with the knife making a puddle of blood on the floor, making it as deep as she could before it gave me any permanent damage.
"This can't be just because I didn't help you when we were little, there has to be something more." I told her, trying to hold in my tears.
"Well, does pure hate qualify?" She asked sarcastically.
"What, so this has all just been an act, for half of your life?"
"For all of it." Rita suddenly told me.
"I don't believe that."
"Really? Was I ever there when mum and dad were drunk and having a go at you, was I ever there when you were locked out because they both managed to knock themselves out?"
"No." I answered, not seeming to care.
"Didn't that give you a clue?" She asked me.
"Not really, with the way we were raised you seemed to be the only good thing."
"Do you think that now?"
"Depends what your next move is." I told her, trying to hold it together.
"You have to remember." Chantelle ordered me.
"Do I want to?" I asked laying back onto my bed, trying not to care, staring at the ceiling.
"Do you remember your sister, Rita?" The nurse asked me, still looking worried.
"I recognise the name." I told them, half shrugging, trying to make them both go away. "So what do you think caused me to lose some of my memories?" I asked, still intrigued.
"You've been here for a week, and I've noticed you've had trouble sleeping so I would guess it's sleep deprivation. Both quantity and quality of sleep are important to memory. Getting too little sleep or waking frequently in the night can lead to fatigue, which interferes with the ability to consolidate and retrieve information." The nurse told me.
"Thanks for the speech." I said sarcastically under my breath.
"So do you remember what your sister looks like?" Chantelle asked me.
I thought hard, then it came to me. "Er...brown hair, one part shaved?" I asked.
"Yeah." Chantelle nodded.
"Your the one that had to drag me into this, if you just kept quiet and dealt with the torture then I wouldn't be here." She stared at me, twirling the knife in her hands.
"I know, I should've thought-"
"Yeah, you should have." Chantelle continued. "You see the blood right?" I looked at the side of her leg, she was bleeding out. "Well, thats on you. I might as well just bleed to death!"
"Then why don't you?"
"You say that as if it hurts." Chantelle smiled. "But for you it doesn't, does it? You're not the one that got stabbed!"
"And you expect me to take the blame for that?! You're the one who came to help in the first place!"
"Keelin never told me what we were actually doing, all she said was 'Kaden's in trouble' and before I knew it my mums dead and there's blood covering my house."
"Look, I'm sorry-" I started.
"Yeah you should be!" Chantelle yelled as the knife went into my shoulder.
"You bitch!" I shouted at her.
"Imagine what I think of you!"
I zoned out, I was staring at the white wall. Vague mutters and whispers ran around my brain, then I realised-
"Kaden?" Chantelle half shouted, trying to get me out of my state. I looked at her, but all I could see is a person dripping with blood screaming at me.
"Get away from me." I said silently, moving away, keeping my distance.
"What?" Chantelle asked confused.
"Get away from me!" I shouted back. I peered down at my arm, it was stitched up. "What my sister did was so bad but what you did wasn't?!" I shouted at her.
"What are you talking about?" I looked back down at my arm, which had numerous different scars on it, and ran my finger along the tight stitches. "You're delirious, it's obviously from the lack of sleep." Chantelle pointed out, getting on my nerves at the same time.
"Really? Or was this something you were just hoping I wouldn't remember?" I asked.
"I got angry, it happens okay?"
"Can you girls please just stay on task of getting Kaden's memory back?" The nurse asked, coming back in the room- I didn't even realise she was gone.
She passed me some photos and sat next to me.
I looked at the first one. "Is that my house?" I asked, not looking to happy about it.
"Yeah." The nurse half smiled, I'm guessing she was just glad that I was improving.
My house didn't look like a 'dream home'. One window was boarded up, the garden was over-growing and it came with the 'haunted house' feeling.
She then changed the picture.
"Is that-" I was looking at dead bodies, a basement full of them. "I'm gonna throw up." I told them looking down and seeing someone's corpse that had been hacked to death.
That's my mum. My second one.
At least I remember that.
"Who's Keelin?" I asked all of a sudden, remembering it from the flashback.
"She was one of our friends." Chantelle told me.
"Was? What, did you kill her?" I asked.
"No, she isn't dead." Chantelle snapped back. "At least I think she isn't."
"Look, can you both just go away, I don't really want to remember what happened because you make it out to seem like the worst thing."
"But you need to know." The nurse told me.
"And whys that?" I asked.
"Because....." She paused. "Your sister escaped from prison. If she manages to get past the officers surrounding the building then she will come for you and Chantelle, and if you don't know what's going on then she'll take advantage of that and use it against you."
"How do you know so much?" I asked.
"Because you told me, yesterday." She looked at me, then got up. "But if you want to be alone I understand." She told me walking out.
Chantelle didn't move.
"Can you leave?" I asked.
"No." She answered plainly. "You were bad enough when you first came here, I know you think it but this isn't better."
"I don't care."
A puddle of blood surrounded me as I laid there, motionless. My eyes could barely open, all I could see was a blurred figure coming towards me.
My head ached. "Can you please just leave." I said shakily.
"I'm not leaving until you're back to normal." Chantelle stayed put.
My brain froze. My eyes fixed on one person: Chantelle. "Fine, just don't blame me when your blood is covering the wall." I quickly went up to her and punched her several times in the face. She then fought back, knocking me over. "What the hell is with you!" She shouted. I ignored her.
I quickly grabbed the pen that was laying on top of the clipboard, on the side table. I then jabbed it into her side.
Blood. More blood.
"Nurse! Nurse!" Chantelle cried as she tried to keep the blood in by trying to cover it with her hands, which didn't help.
She came rushing back in. "I need help in here!" The nurse shouted. I was still having a go at Chantelle, still hitting her, still punching.
I didn't know why.
Two Doctors came in, realised what was happening and tried to pull me back.
"Let go of me!" I screamed, I was angry- maybe angrier than I've ever been, but I don't know.
"You need to calm down." One of the two doctors told me. By this time the nurse took Chantelle out of the room quickly and into another room to patch her up.
I was breathing deeply. I was starting to feel dizzy.
"Kaden, are you ok? Can you hear me?!" I heard in the distance, but it wasn't in the distance, he was standing right beside me, helping me up.