Dare me once, dare me twice, three times a fool. I refuse to kiss anyone on my turn, if it's one of the guy's I'll suffice, but another girl not a chance. Liam has helped me a lot recently and I can't thank him enough for it, but I know that soon I will have to go away, and thinking of a good lie is hard enough when I know I'll have to leave Morris. Hopefully it won't be for long, a month tops, but a lot can happen in one month. I've thought about asking Liam to come with me, he know's how to help me and I can keep him away from her, but part of me need's to do this on my own. I've decided to have a truth day, because dare's will end me up in shit.
"You're seriously not having a dare?" Niall exclaimed and I nodded chuffed. "You're no fun Haz" he whined and slumped down.
"If I were to do a dare it will be for Morris no one else" I winked at Morris and she chuckled. "Oh go on then Niall dare" I challenged him.
"Kiss me" he said and I froze, what is he doing, but this is Niall for you. "Alright you man whore come here" I laughed and kissed him.
"You got a thing for my boyfriend Niall?" Morris smiled.
He smiled "no I was just testing something" he said proudly.
"You sure about that?" Zayn raised his eyebrow and sulked back in his chair.
"Oh I see you're jealous Zayn?" I joked and he frowned.
"I'm not gay so" he said awkwardly and left the room.
Straight away I glanced at Niall who's face had dropped "Niall" I began to say and he shook his head. I sighed going over to him "he's a fucking twat, and pissed off he doesn't mean it" I patted him and he nodded.
Fuck is that...
"Claudine" Liam froze staring at her, my mouth dropped as she approached us.
She and Liam dated a few years back and Liam thought he loved her, she changed him and turned him into a mug. He did everything for her, he was her dog that she could play with whenever she wanted. Unfortunately she was also the girl who I slept with right before she dumped him and moved away. She begged me to go with her, but I was torn up that I had done that to my best friend and declined. I never liked her, I was drunk and it was a bad mistake, something I have regretted for years.
"Hello boys" she smiled her pearly white teeth at us. Neither of us could speak and this made her smile widen "I can see you're both glad to see me, catch up with me in a bit" I wasn't sure who she was speaking to until she winked at me. I cringed and hid my look of shame as I stared away from Liam. He was looking at me I could feel the daggers in my back so I walked away from him shamefully.
"Was that?" Louis was about to say before I pushed past him, the name Claudine needs to be avoided. Morris was by the tree we usually sat at and god was I happy to see her. She held out her arms for me when I approached her and I lent my head on her lap looking up at her.
"What's wrong?" she asked straight away.
"It's nothing" I lied not taking my eyes off her and she frowned.
"You have that look" she questioned me and I retaliated.
"What look?" I asked playfully but she was buying none of it.
"The I just fucked up look and I don't know what to do about it, that look" she said.
"I've done something" I admitted, "a long time ago something I can't take back, and it's catching up with me."
"Then fix it?" she said as if it were the most obvious thing to do.
"It's more complicated than that, what I did is in the past I can't change it."
"The past is the past Harry, people need to get over that."
But she doesn't know what I have done so of course she thinks it's that easy. Looking at me she lent down and kissed the tip of my nose, a thing she does when she tries to be cute, fortunately it fools me every time. "I make mistakes Morris, over and over again and then when I think I've learnt from it I do it again and again. But I want that never to affect us because I love you too much to lose you."
She pulled away from me "what have you done Harry?"
"No it's nothing to do with us, it's just that's what I do, I will never stop and I want you to forgive me."
She looked up as the rest came over to us and sat down. I straightened myself up and lent on the bit of the tree Morris wasn't leaning on.
"So are you having a truth day?" Liam asked and I nodded. Knowing it was a bad idea I went to stop him but I was too late, "did you sleep with her?"
"Who?" I tried to play dumb, but I was fooling no one but myself.
He rolled his eyes "Claudine" and the name hit me hard as I looked at him.
"Yes" I said softly and he closed his eyes shaking his head.
"When?" he questioned me, I'm pretty sure he's only allowed one, but now is not the time.
"Before you guys broke up, it meant nothing I was drunk and stupid and..."
"I don't know what's worse, the fact you did it or the fact you lied to me for all this time" he spat.
"Liam it meant nothing I swear" I cried.
"To you maybe, but did you think for one minute about me, how I would feel?" he growled.
"After I realised what I had done it was too late."
"You think that's a good enough excuse that's weak" he shouted and jumped up from the ground.
"Come on guys we have a gig tonight, fighting will get us nowhere" Niall the peacemaker even though he still hasn't spoke to Zayn.
"I don't care about the gig" I half shouted.
"And if Harry doesn't care then the gig's off it's always about Harry" Liam mocked me.
"Alright" I shouted "you can throw anything at me, but it was a long time ago."
"Were you ever going to tell me?" he tilted his head angry, "or was it because she showed up?"
"I was going to tell you when the time was right" I said to him.
"And what that time is now? Save it Harry I'll see you all at the gig" he waved us off and stormed away. Minutes we sat in silence until everybody left one by one until I was alone. Morris patted my hand before she left with Louis, and the other two went there separate ways. One lousy mistake can ruin everything, how could I be so stupid, why did I never tell him?
Before every gig we have a group hug and say one thing we are thankful for. It seemed pointless today no one was in the mood and it was going to be a crap gig.
I wanted to talk to Liam before the gig and ask if he was alright, but the truth is I have no idea what to say. Harry fucked up big time, but it was a long time ago, still it doesn't hurt any less. He hasn't talked to anyone, even on the drive over when Louis offered him a crisp, he shook his head and continued to look out the window. My best attempt to comfort him was to squeeze his hand, that seemed to have no impact whatsoever. I sat away from the crowd but not so invisible that they couldn't see me. I gave Harry a positive smile before they began and I hoped he would hold on to that. I've never gotten involved with their music, I wait like everyone else to hear it.
"This is a new one for you guys, and it's called Happily" Harry announced. I sat back in my chair with my beer and listened to them sing.
Harry started off and as usual I was mesmerized "You don't understand, you don't understand. What you do to me when you hold his hand." I'm happy that in this moment is the first time I have heard this, because it felt right. Liams eyes found mine as he sung "It's 4 am and I know that you're with him, I wonder if he knows that I touched your skin." Goosebumps formed on my arms and a shiver ran through my spine as we stared at each other. Eventually I had to look away, I needed to get out of here. I left my seat and found a place for me to stand once I was outside. It was freezing outside but I couldn't be in there, it was better for me to stay outside. I thought about going back to Harry's but that would be me being dramatic.
"Take my jacket" I heard Liams voice behind me.
"It's okay" I told him, I would rather freeze to death then take something of his.
He sighed ignoring me and wrapping it around me, I couldn't bring myself to thank him. "Nice song" I said smoothly.
"You like it?" he smiled "I wrote it a couple of months ago"
I mentally hit myself and immediately changed the subject. "You need to forgive Harry you know, he does this" I stuck up for him.
"Kate don't, I thought I loved her, she was everything to me. He knew how I felt about her and mocked me for it, he kept telling me to leave her and then he goes and does that" he had a pure look of disappointment.
"You need to forgive him" I said again.
Finally he nodded "I will when we're even."