"Sorry?" I shrieked, "give it to me" I said snatching the note from Zayn's hand. "Sorry for what?" but they knew as much as I did, "he's gone." This wasn't the time to cry and make a scene, but all of a sudden I felt unwanted and alone.
"Kate" Liam wrapped his hand around my arm and I yanked it away.
"This is all your fault get away from me" I shouted running up to Harry's room. Even being here made me feel sick, I couldn't stay here this wasn't right. I grabbed my things and shoved them into a bag, come on Kate hurry up! Louis was blocking the doorway once I had done, he was shaking his head.
"Get out of my way Louis" I said coldly but he wouldn't budge "please" I begged him. Instead he grabbed my bag dropping it on the floor and pulled me close to him. The tears I had held in came and I weeped all over his shirt. "Why" I said over and over again expecting some sort of rational answer, but nothing came, only silence. But deep down I knew why it's because he thinks I slept with Liam, which I didn't. If only I could tell him that, pulling away from Louis was hard but I did it with great difficulty. He rubbed the tears from my face and frowned "I hate seeing you like this Morris." But what was I meant to say that I'm okay, yes. "I'm fine Lou I just need some time to absorb this in my brain, can you leave me for a while?" He began shaking his head "I won't leave, I just need to be alone."
He sighed "don't shut me out Morris, that's not good for anyone."
"I'm not" I lied briefly, "I promise just give me some time." He kissed the top of my head and left, my legs could no longer hold me so I dropped to the floor searching for my phone. Once I had found it I dialled his number "hey you have reached Harry, if you're worthy enough I'll call you back." Great so he turned his phone off, of course that fucker did. How could he do this to me, after everything? But as he mildly put it I make mistakes over and over again, and when I think I have learnt I will make them again. Of course there was a pun to that little speech never leave me. I can't keep waiting for him to mess up again, and then finally decide what he's doing is wrong. I chucked my phone on the floor and joined the others. "I want to get drunk and I mean really drunk, I want to forget my name and who I am, who's with me?" I announced, but they knew I had already made up my mind. Louis kept his eyes on me at all times, making sure I didn't leave. "Lou you need to trust me, I'm not leaving, but you can't stop me from drinking" I said to him.
"You think drinking away all your troubles will solve them but they won't" I've never given him enough credit to how much he has changed until now.
"I'm not I know they will be there tomorrow and the next, I just want one night to forget please" I pleaded with him again and this time he nodded.
"Fine, but you're not drinking alone" he said pulling out a bottle of vodka making me laugh.
How I don't know, but Harry's house was filled with lots and lots of people. Luckily I was too drunk to care, I wanted to forget about him for now, because I know deep down it's over between us. I noticed Jess in the corner of the room with Tyler, they looked uncomfortable so I approached them.
"Hi guys thank you for coming" I greeted them and they smiled wearily at me.
"Kate" Jess said but I shook my head "call me something else not Kate or Morris."
"What do you want us to call you then?" she said playing along.
"Anything I don't care just not my name" and they smiled unaware of the pain inside me.
"Sally" Jess nodded "yes we'll call you Sally."
I shrugged, it works for me. I left them to it and found another bottle of vodka on the side.
Louis thought it would be a good idea to invite the school by the looks of it. Niall was lying down in my room and I frowned "what are you doing in here?" I asked him.
"I was waiting for you, we need to talk." But I didn't want to talk, especially about what he wants to talk about. "Zayn come on sit down" he patted the bed and I obeyed. "I'm sorry I was lost in the moment, and I don't know" he sighed.
"I don't want to talk about it Niall, please just forget about it."
"Why?" he tilted his head "it was a mistake I know you're not gay, just laugh it off, I know the others would."
"But I'm not like the others" I lashed out at him. "I don't feel how they feel, I don't want what they want."
"Well what do you want?" he questioned me, and it was something I didn't want to answer, especially to him.
"I don't know" I said throwing my hands in the air.
"It's okay to admit what you want Zayn no one's going to judge you."
I lent closer to him "they may or may not, but I will judge myself, and that's enough for me."
Suddenly we were too close but I couldn't pull away from him, whether it was the drink or hormones I kissed him. After realising what I was doing I yanked my head back and ran out the room ignoring his calls to me. Morris was sitting on the floor leaning her head on the wall with a bottle of vodka in her hand, "fancy sharing?" I smirked at her.
The light blinded me as I tried to open my eyes, my head was in agony and I felt sick. I tried to sit up but my body ignored my brain and left me to stay where I was. It was freezing in here had I left the window open? I looked over and it was shut, but I was wearing nothing. I heard a groan from beside me and I closed my eyes shut wishing I would wake up please god no.
"Morris?" I heard Zayn's voice and I froze.