I can't believe I just said that! Did I really just tell her that I like her? Do I even like her? Why did I even say that? What is getting into me? She already thinks I'm a jerk, and now she probably thinks I'm the biggest loser ever. Good goin' Harry, and now you have to face her in class tommorrow. I'm not leaving the room for the rest of the day.
Even if she did like me, this could never work. Once she found out, she would never look at me again. I mean lets face it. How could a nice, innocent, sweet girl like Chloe possibly like damaged goods like me.? I don't even deserve her, but I want her so bad. But what if something happened to her? Would I be able to protect her, save her? What if I'm not there like I wasn't for my mom?
But honestly, the damn girl never leaves my head. It's like she's thrown an invisible lasso around me, reeling me in closer and closer, and I just can't get enough. She invades my thoughts during the day, and haunts my dreams during the night. What is she doing to me?
It's been almost three hours since Harry's confession towards me and I'm still in complete shock. I wish somebody was there to witness it so I know it was real. I think Harry got the wrong interpretation of my silent reaction, because he stormed off. I really didn't want to go back to my room on the off chance that I would face him again, so I hopped in my car and decided to take the rest of the day off and treat myself to some shopping to get him out of my mind.
I start going through all the reasons in my head to why a guy as hot amd amazing as Harry could possibly like me. I think I'm going crazy because the most logical reason I can think of is that he must have been on drugs to have said that to me.
As I move through the racks attempting to shop away my feelings, I start to plan what I'm going to say to Harry in class tommorrow. I'm not going to hide anymore. Im going to tell him straight up that I like him, and whatever he says back is his own problem. I need to express my emotions and just let the elephant out of the room. Who knows, maybe he will actually like me back too, and then we could go from there. I start looking through the shoes and I notice a nice pair of boots. I wonder if Harry would like these boots? No! I can't be thinking of him right now. Ugh. I'm here to NOT be thinking about him!
The mall closed early today, and I still didn't want to go back to my dorm, so I decided to stop and eat at my favorite Thaiu restaurant. Hmm, I wonder if Harry likes Thai food? No goddammit! That boy won't just leave me alone for at least a couple of hours! Why can't I stop thinking about him?! Ok, that was my last thought of him. No more Harry for the next hour so I can enjoy my meal in peace!
I decide on ordering this chicken that they had on the specials menu. It tasted a little funky, but maybe that was just how it was supposed to taste. Oh well. I pay the bill and hop in my car to head back to campus. Campus, that means my dorm, which means Harry. And we're back to Harry oh my God!
I get back to my room thankfully without having to face Harry, and try to concentrate on doing my homework. Of course that doesn't work out because I still can't stop thinking about that damn curly haired boy. All of a sudden my stomach starts to feel weird. Wow, I thought about Harry so much that I gave myself a stomach ache. I very soon realize that this isn't just a stomach ache when I find myself puking my brains out in my bathroom. I try to think of what made me so sick, but I immediately know what is was. I got food poisoning from that funky chicken. Well in this condition I'm definately not going to be able to go to class tommorrow. Which means I won't be able to tell Harry how I feel. Great, now he's going to think I'm a big chicken. Only I would get the one piece of bad chicken that they had in that freakin Thai restaurant. As I lay there in a ball clutching my stomach, I think of what Harry is going to think tommorrow when I don't show up to class.
She's not here. Chloe's not in class. I can't believe it. I scared her away. I didn't expect that to happen. Even if she didn't actually like me back, I thought that she would at least have the decency to show up and tell me. As I continue to think more and more about this, I can't help but to get mad. She really skipped class just so she didn't have to face me? I mean what type of a person does that? I think this with a shred of doubt, knowing that deep down Chloe just isn't that type of girl. Something must be wrong with her. There has to be a reason why she isn't here. I go with my gut instinct and get up and walk out right in the middle of class, determined to find out what happenned to Chloe.
I run down the hall until I get to Chloe's door, knocking on it to see if she's in there. I hear a ruffling noise from the inside of the room, and I knock harder screaming "Chloe I know you're in there, open up!" There's still no answer, so I have no choice but to open the door and go in there. My face instantly falls when I see the condition that Chloe is in. She's in bed, blankets up to her neck, clutching her stomach, with beads of sweat running down her face. Her nose is sniffly and it looks as if she had been crying.
When she see's me she tries her best to scream "Get out of here!" She fails, but I know she just doesn't want me to see her like this. I don't care what she says, I'm not leaving her side until she's better. And besides, even in this condition she looks absolutely beautiful. I look at the state she's in, and I decide to make a list of all the materials I need to go get to help Chloe get better. I run to the nearest store and buy some Tums, Nyquil, towelette that I can dab her face with, a thermometer to monitor here fever, and the biggest plush blanket I can find to make sure she's comfortable. I feel so bad. If I could take away her sufferring I would. I want the old Chloe back. I promise myself at that moment that when she gets better, I'm going to spill the beans. I'm going to tell her everything. Even my darkest secret. I'm going to lay down the cards on the table just so she knows that she is worth the risk. Once she hears everything, it will be up to her to decide whether or not she wants to take a chance on me. I don't want to hide anymore, and I certaintly don't want to hide anything from Chloe.