Harry helps me up the several flights of stairs and I feel his presence behind me the entire time.
"I'm fine Harry," I say.
"Sure you are," he says sarcastically before letting out a small chuckle. "I'm just helping ya out Doniya."
"Yeah, I know."
We finally make it to my room and Harry opens the door for me. I slowly walk over to my bed and try to sit down carefully, but it still fucking hurts like hell.
"Shit," I say before biting my lip. "The fucker got me."
"Yeah he did," Harry bluntly admits. " But at least you're still here to tell the story," Harry laughs.
"Hahaha," I say sarcastically before rolling my eyes at him and flicking him off.
Harry sits down at the edge of my bed and watches me as I shift around on my bed. His stare makes me kind of uncomfortable, but I know that he is just being observant.
"You alright now?" he asks me as I finally get comfortable.
Harry rubs his hand over his face and sighs.
"You can leave know if you wanna," I tell him. "You've done your job."
"What if I don't wanna go?" he says before raising his eyebrow at me and smiling.
His eyes are even smiling. Jeez.
"Well I guess you can stay here."
Harry lays down on my bed and looks over at me. "I wasn't going to leave anyway, even if you told me too," he laughs.
"Yeah, I know."
A couple seconds pass and Harry continues to stare at me with his green eyes. I don't know what to think of it. But whenever he's looking at me...I just get nervous...to the point where I'm just locked in place.
That's what I like to call "The Harry Effect."
"You acted pretty ballsy today Doniya," he says before laughing. "You've got a lot of guts."
"Well I got it from my parents of course," I reply. "You know that."
"But still," Harry says before chuckling. "It was a pretty ballsy move."
"Are you mad because I have more balls than you ever will?" I say teasingly.
"Haha no," he says. "I'm pretty sure I've got more balls. I am a man aren't I?"
"Ha no," I reply. "You're still a little boy in my eyes."
Harry moves closer to me and I feel my heart start to race.
"Are you sure about that?" he asks.
"Yup," I say nervously.
Harry is now right in front of me. If I move even a little, our noses will touch. I just want him to kiss me right now.
"Kiss me," I whisper out loud.
What am I saying?
"What?" Harry says.
"You heard me," I say. "Kiss me."
I feel Harry's lips against mine and he cups my cheek in his hand. Our lips begin to move in sync and I rest my hand in Harry's hair.
In my mind right now, I am smacking myself a bunch of times. But I couldn't help it.
I have betrayed myself.
Harry breaks the kiss and sets his forehead against mine.
"What just happened?" I ask.
"We kissed," Harry says as a smirk spreads across his face.
I back away from Harry and place my face in my hands.
"That shouldn't have happened. I'm sorry Harry," I say. "I don't know what came over m-"
"Shh," Harry says before moving my hands away from my face and rubbing his thumb over my cheek. "I wanted to kiss you too," he says while looking me in the eyes. "I haven't stopped thinking about you Doniya," he says.
His words make my heart flutter. I've missed him too honestly...
"I missed you," I say.
Harry presses his lips on mine again, and I feel butterflies in my stomach. "I'm gonna go now, so I can let you get some rest."
"Okay," I say, still phased by the kiss that just happened seconds ago.
I try to not sound upset...because I don't want him to leave. I really don't know what's going on. I just don't want him to leave. But I don't want anyone to walk in and see us together. So yeah...
"Goodnight Doniya," he says before smiling at me.
"Goodnight Harry," I say before giving him a small smile.
Harry turns off the light in my room and then walks out, leaving me alone in my room.
I close my eyes and try to fall asleep. But I can't.
This is the aftermath of "The Harry Effect."
I sit down in my chair upstairs near the window, and look at the sky. The stars are out tonight, illuminating the night sky.
I take a small sip of my beer and let out a long sigh.
She's gone. She's really gone.
I guess I should have seen this coming.
I guess this is what I get for opening myself up to someone. This shows that I cannot trust anyone. I don't know what caused me to trust Mari. I just felt like I could tell her anything, without her betraying me. But, again I was wrong. It seems like I always am lately.
I get up out of the chair and walk across the hall to my bedroom. I open the door and part of me hopes expects Mari to be there, laying down with my t-shirt on and her brown eyes looking me up and down.
It's what I usually expect to see every time I come in my room. But not tonight, because she's not here. And she won't be back here anytime soon.
Why did she do this to me? It doesn't make any sense. It still doesn't make any sense to me. But it happened. So, I should believe it and stop doubting her actions.
I wonder what she's doing right now...
Probably thinking of someone else she can play.
Ha, everything was a game to her.
I'm such a fucking idiot.
I throw my beer bottle against the wall and watch as it shatters into a million pieces, and watch as the remaining liquid falls down the wall.
I can't describe how I feel right now.
But part of me is still in denial.
Mari wouldn't do this to me. She couldn't.
But the other part of me is in reality, and is actually believing what happened earlier.
"FUCK!" I shout before punching a nearby wall.
Mari's words from earlier replay in my head: I love you Zayn.
Well if you fucking loved me, why would you lie?
Her words seemed true to me though. I believed her for a split second. But no. It was probably all a little act to try to play me again.
But, the thing is...I just don't know what to think. I honestly don't.
But my heart aches right now.
I wonder if she would still 'love me' if she were here right beside me right now?
But if she did...I think I would tell her that I loved her too.
I love you Mari.