I ran to the bathroom crying then stopped after looking at myself in the mirror. I opened up the cabinet and grabbed one of the razors. I didn't know whether it was Hazza's or Lou's. I didn't really care. I threw it on the floor and stamped on it so it broke and the razors where released. I picked them up from the floor and placed them on my wrist just as the door burst open to find Harry standing there with puffy eyes and tears cascading down his face. Damn, I forgot to lock the door.
"Go away" I mumbled but he still didn't leave me alone, what was his problem. I looked up to see him coming over to me and his hand reaching out to take the razors off of me. The dropped from my small palm to his larger one and that's when I collapsed to my knees with my back against the wall furthest away from the door.
Harry came to sat me and wrapped his arms around me as I buried my face is his chest sobbing silently. I heard the boys and girls come to the door, see me and Holly on the floor, both of us crying and then to the razors that were scattered on the floor next to us. Liam ushered everyone away and then collected the razors, throwing them away. I smiled at him thanking him telepathically. Then he left.
I began to sing Fix You by Coldplay.
When you try your best but you don't succeed.
When you get what you want but not what you need.
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep.
Stuck in reverse.
Lights will guide you home.
And ignite your soul.
And I will try...
To fix you.
She looked up at me with red eyes which just broke me that little bit more.
"I love you, you know that?" She said. And that did it for me. She did love me!
"You know I do Holly. I won't let you hurt yourself or torture yourself for this. Joe did something excusable and I will never let him get away with it ok?! I love you so fucking much Holly" I said crying as I did.
"I may be broken but I need you Haz, I really do"
"I can fix you" I said and kissed her on the lips, holding her hand as we stood up to the bedroom where we lay until darkness overtook us.
"I will fix you"