Just Tell Another Lie

Why even bother with life if I'm going to die anyways?


4. So Lonely

"Hello again Raven.So about a week ago you said your mom has had a drug abuse?"

"She was also alcoholic.Now,I don't mean to be a snitch,but I thought it would be useful."

"It is,Raven.You're being more open.I appreciate the efforts your making to help yourself."

But I'm not trying to help myself...

"When was the first time your mother showed signs of these addictions?"


"So lonely.I'm so lonely."

"Amber,I'm sorry.Just please listen to me."

"How come you screwed that bitch,but haven't touched me ever since Raven was born?Was it my fault?Tell me,Dave!I'm feeling a bit fucking mad right now!"

My father threw his coat on the floor."Amber,it has nothing to do with you."

"Then what is it?How come you leave me on my own?Did our marriage mean nothing?I'm so lonely."

"It's just...it's-it's-

"It's what,Dave?!"My mother shouted."That woman isn't the only thing you can screw up!"

"It's this fucking family!Raven can never be normal!You can't either!You're constantly drinking!Everything's so wrong!"He sat down on the couch and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Oh grow up!Normal?That's what you want?You're more fucked up than I thought,Dave."My mother glanced at the door;catching me watching by the door frame."Raven,it's late.Why aren't you in bed?"Her tone was harsh.

"What's wrong?"I asked as I rubbed my eyes.

"Go to bed sweetheart."My dad sighed."Mommy and I are talking about stuff,and you have school tomorrow."

"But-Was it my fault that this happened?"I stuttered as the thought of it actually being my fault.

"That what happened?"My dad patted his lap;motioning me to sit on it.

I went over to him and sat down on his lap."Well you and mommy are always fighting."

"I know,but we love each other,so you shouldn't get scared."He kissed the top of my head.

"No,Dave.I don't love you.Ever since you fucked that whore and helped her family."My mother yelled from the kitchen.I hadn't notice she had gotten up for something to drink.

My father's eyes grew wide.As if what he had heard weren't true."Amber,you-

"Yes I knew!I know everything that goes on at work!"She spat.

"Why didn't you say anything?Why do you keep me still?"His voice was more of a whisper,but that didn't make him quiet.

"Because I loved you!"She shouted."I thought I could make us work,but my hatred for you just grows every day I see your face!"She said through gritted teeth.

"You're terrible."My father's voice was at loss.

"Oh I'm terrible?!"She laughed."Get the fuck out!"

"Amber,but Raven-

"I don't care!Out!"She furiously wiped her tears away.

He carried me out the door.

"Dad..."The lump in my throat made it hard for me to be heard.His arms wrapped tighter around me.His pace grew faster as raindrops started to fall one by one.

"It'll all be okay Raven."He kissed the top of my forehead before sliding me into the backseat of his car.


"Okay Raven."Micheal smiled.

"Anything else?"I sighed.

"Not for now.Maybe next time we see each other we can discuss more if you wish."He tucked his pen in his shirt-pocket."I'll walk you out."He held the door for me as I walked out.



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