I yet again managed to fall asleep on by bed, waking up when there was a knock at my door. I rubbed my eyes calling "come in" and Harry walked in holding a plate with a piece of pizza on it. I looked towards the balcony doors raising my eyebrows at how dark it had gotten.
"Is it really this time already?" I questioned, sitting up and clearing my throat.
Harry smiled, passing me the pizza and nodded. "Yeah, I wondered where you'd got to actually."
I thanked him and shrugged. "I didn't even realise I'd fallen asleep. I'm just tired I think."
"Well yeah, obviously why else would you have fallen asleep?" he replied, sighing as he sat down on the bed facing me.
I smiled at him and he smiled back. I then picked up the pizza trying some to fill the silence which had come up between us.
Harry was looking at his hands, and I noticed his smile vanish. "Are you okay?" I asked, and he nodded. I didn't believe him.
He looked up and I sighed. "What's wrong Harry?" I asked giving him a searching look.
"Nothing" he replied simply and I gave him a look. He sighed then told me "I think I've hurt Liam's feelings."
"What makes you say that?" I asked.
"Well you know when he went off in a mood a bit earlier, when he came back he just looked sad, and I feel like it's my fault" he replied, and I shifted awkwardly.
"It isn't your fault Harry" I told him.
It was mine. I'd made Liam sad and now I feel terrible about it.
"No, I think it is" Harry replied, and he looked at me with sadness in his eyes.
"No Harry" I told him desperately, putting the plate down on the bedside table and leaning closer to him.
"What makes you so sure?" he asked, and I didn't know how to reply to that. I didn't want to tell him what had happened. I couldn't. He'd be seriously angry with Liam I'm sure.
I shrugged. "I just know Harry. It's not your fault" I offered for an explanation.
He sighed. "It is my fault. I mean Liam's not usually like this, and ever since we argued I swear he's been depressed or something. I apologized but he didn't say much to me then." He then hung his head low, saying in a deep sad voice. "This is all my fault. I feel like our friendship's dying."
"Then talk to him" I suggested. "Talk to him Harry, ask him if he's okay."
Harry looked me in the eyes sighing. "I would, but I'm afraid I'll just make it all worse."
"You won't" I encouraged feeling seriously guilty right now. It wasn't Harry's fault Liam was sad, it was mine, but I couldn't tell him. What would happen if I did tell him what had gone on between Liam and me I didn't want to think about. I bet Harry would get so angry and then their friendship would be well and truly broken.
Harry sighed. "I won't talk to him yet. I'll give it a bit of time. Maybe your right that it isn't my fault that he's in a mood. Maybe there's another reason. Don't know what though."
I nodded trying not to show my anxiousness and guilt in my face. Harry then smiled at me, getting up from the bed looking more happy than he had done. "Thanks Annie. You're amazing."
I smiled back weakly and replied "I didn't really help much."
Harry shrugged. "I think you did." Then he got to the door opening it. "Why don't you come down and sit with us?"
I nodded. "Okay, just give me a minute."
He smiled again, leaving the room. When I was sure he was gone, I leaned back into the pillows, biting my lip anxiously. Liam was sad and Harry had thought that his new depression mood was his fault. It was my fault, I knew it was me. I know now that he really liked me, and has done since he first saw me. I then have told him I don't think I like him that he just makes me act like I do.
Of course he was going to be sad. I felt tears sting in my eyes. This was all my fault, but still what am I supposed to do? I don't want him to break rules, and I don't want him to attract me so that he doe's break them. I sighed, wiping my eyes hastily. Just when I thought things were fine they have to mess up again. Why hadn't I even though of Liam's feelings?
I tried to push it to the back of my mind, standing up, rubbing my eyes again and putting on my glasses for no reason at all apart from my eyes were hurting and I thought that I might need to put them on. I then left my room, going downstairs.
When I got to the kitchen Niall was there, opening the fridge. He looked round at me as he entered, smiling widely at me. I returned the smile only half-heartedly, then asked "what you doing?"
"Getting a snack" he explained pulling out a packet of small cream pies. "Want one?"
I shook my head, and he muttered "your loss" taking one and putting it in his mouth whole. I crossed the kitchen, leaving Niall to his food, and entering the lounge, where Harry was now playing Zayn on the Xbox. I rolled my eyes, thinking that they were being very typical boys at the moment.
"Hello, squiggle bum bum" called Louis, who was sat on the sofa nearest to the door, looking over his shoulder.
"Don't call me that" I snapped at him, glaring, making to climb over the back of the sofa to sit next to him.
Except my climbing didn't go that successfully and I lost my footing, ending up toppling on top of Louis. He sniggered as I fell on him, my head bumping into his chest and my elbow accidently hitting him in the arm.
"Sorry" I apologized flushing pink and trying to get off him, but slipping around totally dizzy.
Louis was smirking. "You can stay here if you want" he told me with a wink then pulling me up into a sitting position on his lap.
"No, I want to sit there" I replied, pointing to the space next to him and trying to squirm away.
He had his arms round me now, keeping me on him. I tried to get away but he wouldn't let me. "Let go" I ordered him, but he only sat there grinning. I groaned, annoyed, hitting him round the head lightly.
"Ouch" he complained, rubbing his head with one hand, holding onto me with the other.
"Well let me go then" I told him, looking round at Harry who was totally immersed in beating Zayn on the Xbox and wasn't in a position to be annoyed with Louis right now.
Louis shook his head cheekily and I rolled my eyes at his childish attitude. I looked around the room for help, and spotted Liam, looking over at us. I tried to signal with my eyes for him to help me, but he only looked away. I felt something drop in my heart. I'd really hurt him, that fact dawned on me. I'd really hurt him, and I know how hurting like that feels. Only this time I'm the reason that someone is hurting and that really hurts me to.
I stopped struggling in Louis' arms suddenly feeling like crying.
"What's up babe?" asked Louis. He was looking at my face, actually looking concerned.
"Nothing" I lied, again trying to get off him. Finally I got out of his arms, sliding onto the sofa next to him.
"Are you sure?" he asked, and I quickly nodded back, looking at the floor, and away from anyone.
"You don't look like you're happy" he told me.
"Don't I?" I mumbled, feeling like I was just seconds away from crying now.
Louis made a noise as thought to say yes, and I looked round at him again. He was looking concerned still.
"Why do you care?" I asked him suddenly.
He looked surprised at my sudden question, but then replied "because I'm nice."
"But I don't get it" I replied "I've only just got here. You don't even know me. None of you apart from Harry does."
"That's not true" he replied. "Yeah you've not been here long, but your Harry's sister, therefore my new friend, and all friends should be caring to their friends."
I smiled at this. He'd actually called me a friend. I hadn't had friends in ages. "Thanks" I thanked him then looked across the room at Liam, sighing.
"Tell me what's wrong honey" urged Louis, and I felt him brush some hair away from my face.
I shrugged. "Stuff" I simply replied.
He nodded but asked "what stuff?"
I didn't reply, sighing and shrugging again. "Why doe's everything have to be so confusing?"
Louis laughed lightly at this then said in reply "because life's not fair. Everyone knows it."
I sighed, almost laughing a little at his reply. It was so clique but who cared. I then looked round at him, making to put my head on his shoulder but not knowing if I should. He seemed to some how get it, pulling me towards him so my head was on his shoulder and his arm was round me.
"Just forget your problems right now" he told me.
I nodded, closing my eyes and sighing.
Suddenly I heard Harry exclaim loudly, and Zayn swearing and I opened my eyes to see that Harry had won. I rolled my eyes at them, lifting my head from Louis' comforting shoulder and smiling at Harry as he looked round at me.
"I think it's my turn" I told him, doing my best to try and be happy, getting up and walking over to them.
Harry laughed at me. "You can't beat me."
"Oh yes I can" I retorted then pulled the controller from Zayn. He moved and I sat down filling his position, looking round at Harry wickedly. "We'll see who's the champion now."
Then we started to play, the boys gathering around to watch, Zayn and Louis cheering me on instead of Harry. Niall soon came running in, and was supporting me too. Somehow I just knew Liam wasn't watching. I felt sadness creep up on me again, but pushed it back down as best I could as I nearly crashed my car in the game.
"I am so going to win" Harry told me, concentration etched all over his face as he tried to overtake me.
"No you won't" I yelled back succeeding in over taking him instead, and smirking evilly.
Harry made a noise of aggravation trying to bash into me, but I chose that moment to speed up and he crashed into the side instead. I laughed at him as he tried to regain control, and whilst he did I managed to get a significant lead. I could already taste victory.
And I proved who was champion by after a couple more minutes playing crossing the finish line ages before Harry had.
"I hate you" he yelled, but I ignored him smiling in victory.
Louis and the others were laughing and Niall called to Harry "you've just been beaten by a girl."
I laughed too, nudging him as he looked a mixture between annoyed, aggravated and embarrassed. "Who's the champion now?"
He gritted his teeth at me, putting down the controller and stalking over to sit on the sofa. I spun around to smile at him, giving him a look and asking again smugly "who's the champion?"
"Your the champion" he finally muttered after several pressing looks from me.
I smiled, getting up and doing a victory dance. "In your face." And I danced around him, ruffling his hair up just to make him extra annoyed. I then collapsed laughing next to him, unable to stop giggling.
"Squiggle bum bum is the official amazing champion" Louis exclaimed, beaming at me, looking so pleased that I'd beaten Harry.
I didn't even tell him off for using my nickname, I was just feeling too happy right now.
"And squiggle bum bum is the most nasty person in the world" Harry commented, giving me a stern expression.
I just rolled my eyes, giggling and ruffling his hair again. He batted my hand away annoyed, putting his true sulking face on. I just laughed, sighing to try and get myself to calm down, leaning against the arm of the sofa, my feet in his lap. He didn't object to it looking too ashamed of himself to say anything else to me right now.
Once I had calmed down a bit, I was still smiling and the boys were still teasing him. Finally he just sighed, rolling his eyes and muttering "fine, she's the total champion and I'm just a loser."
"To right you are" I agreed mockingly, as he gave me a look and I smiled back.
He then smiled too making a noise in his throat before saying to me "glad to see you're smiling."
I nodded. "Me too." Right now I was feeling happier than I had done in ages.
"She's cute when she smiles" commented Niall's voice and I quickly looked round at him, feeling Harry glaring at him already.
"Well thank you" I replied awkwardly, as Niall rubbed the back of his neck nervously muttering a sorry at Harry and turning away heading for the kitchen again.
Suddenly things seemed to have stepped down a gear. My smile had faded and all excitement was gone. I looked at Liam, I don't know why, I just did. He was staring at me again. I tried to pretend I wasn't looking but once he'd caught my eye it was impossible to fake that I was just casually looking around the room. He held my gaze for a few seconds before abruptly turning his head looking away. I could just feel sadness radiating from him.
I felt my heart drop again as I looked back to the others, pulling up a fake smile. Louis was giving me a searching look, Zayn was too absorbed with texting someone and Harry hadn't seemed to notice anything.
I cleared my throat, suddenly feeling a yawn coming on, stifling it and pulling a cushion to me to hug feeling cold and upset again all of a sudden. I sighed, closing my eyes. No one said anything and nor did I want to open my eyes to see who was looking at me. Right now I just wanted to go back to being happy, but I just couldn't. I couldn't shake the image of Liam's sad face, which I knew was all my fault.
I was going to start a fresh about my feeling towards Liam. I'd told myself I would, but now that's gone out the window. What have I done? What is happening?
Liam's sad and it's all my fault and I have no one I can consult in about this apart from Liam himself who I know will probably only make things more confusing and hard.
I felt like screaming. Why did things have to be so difficult for me? Why couldn't I just have a normal, simple life?
I suddenly opened my eyes, putting down the kitchen and announcing dully "I'm going to bed."
"But it's only 8" Harry told me. I shrugged making my way to leave the room.
"I'm tired" is all I replied, leaving the room, and crossing the kitchen, saying goodnight to Niall on my way and heading up the stairs.
When I got to my room, I slumped down on my bed, checking my phone to find two new messages from Mia, not bothering to read them and turning off my phone. I didn't need anything else on my mind right now. I was weighed down by so many thoughts it was physically and mentally exhausting me. I really just wanted to sleep, forget things and maybe, just maybe, things would be easier in the morning.
I doubt it.