The next couple of days seemed to pass in a blur. I was happy, well as happy as I could be, the boys seeming to be twice as funny as usual, maybe to improve my mood, or maybe just because they were near the seaside and that brought out their childish side even more.
Liam was being his kind self as usual and he seemed really happy also. Although he had to keep the hugging to a minimal around the others he still lost no time in sneaking into my room early in the morning and saying good morning along with a hug which he never seemed to stop until he heard someone else coming.
So basically as far as things go I'm starting to feel slightly better. I'm still scared of Jason finding me and sometimes get a little upset about how so many things have gone wrong but before I get too carried away with being sad the boys seem to sort that out by making me laugh whether they realise it or not.
"Annie!" I heard someone call from outside my bedroom door. I sighed, rolling my eyes and getting up off the bed where I was attempting to get some more work done.
I knew who it was. I could recognize his voice anywhere.
I stood up, walking to the door and opening it to find unsurprisingly Liam there.
"There is a thing called knocking you know. What do you want?" I asked in an attempt to pretend to be annoyed, but it didn't really work seen as him smiling down at me made me smile back at him.
"Sorry. Oh nothing" he replied in what was his attempt to be annoying to me to.
I rolled my eyes, giggling. He dropped the act, grinning at me and then asking "can I come in?"
"If you want" I replied, and stepped back to let him through. When I shut the door I felt Liam put his arms around my hugging me from behind. I sighed.
"What was that sigh for?" he asked.
"I don't know" I replied back truthfully, and turned around in his arms looking up at him. "I just guess I feel this is unreal."
"Unreal, what do you mean?" he asked curiously, looking down at me.
I sighed again. "I can't believe I'm letting you break the rules."
He sighed to. "But you're happy aren't you?"
I nodded, not quite managing to smile though. Liam stepped back from me walking over to the bed and sitting down looking over at me. I couldn't help but feel that he was slightly annoyed.
I stared back at him, walking over and cautiously sitting down next to him.
"Are you annoyed?" I asked quietly, not looking at him.
He shrugged as he made a noise in his throat. I looked round at him and at his face as he stared down at the floor looking moody.
"I'm sorry" I whispered, not daring to hold his hand even if it was laying right there and I wanted to.
"What for?" he asked and he met my eyes.
I couldn't say anything, looking away. "I just..." I trailed.
"Just what?" snapped Liam, sounding even more annoyed.
I looked at him again. He really needed to sort out getting annoyed so easily.
"Why are you annoyed?" I asked remaining calm.
He got up, pacing the room his arms folded. At first he didn't answer, then he did, again sounding annoyed. "I just find it funny" he said.
"Funny. What do you mean?" I asked seriously confused and actually a little scared.
"It's like you take me for granted" he replied, and he came to a stop, leaning back on the wall and looking over at me.
I stared at him. My voice shook as I spoke to him, my hands starting to tremble "I d-don't take you for granted L-Liam."
"Well it seems like that sometimes" he replied moodily, his eyes dark and scaring me.
"I don't understand" I stuttered, getting up onto my feet and approaching him slowly and cautiously. "What do you mean?"
I tried to reach out for him but he shook my hand off his arm. I bit my lip, my eyes stinging. I knew if I wasn't careful I'd start crying again.
"It's just, you started accepted me, you started letting me in. One moment you're fine with it and then the next moment you're on about the rules again, pushing me away" he suddenly burst out looking furious.
I stepped back, scared of him being angry and replying back, a tear dropping down my face "I'm not pushing you away."
"Well it's what it seems like. It's like you don't want me. You're all on about the rules again" he argued back a snapping quality to his voice.
"I'm s-sorry" I apologized.
He suddenly laughed, but didn't sound amused. He looked straight at me. "Crying again are we? Is that all you do? If you're not banging on about me breaking rules you're crying."
His words hit me like a tidal wave, it echoing in my ears and penetrating to my brain. How could he say such a thing to me?
More tears dropped down my cheeks. "I thought you understood me" I whispered, shaking now and staring at him with hurt in my eyes.
Suddenly he froze the angry look disappearing from his face and instead a guilty one showing. "Oh god" he muttered to himself. He reached out for me but I stepped away from him. "I didn't mean to say that."
"But you did Liam" I replied back, through my tears. He stepped forward but I stepped back again.
"Annie.." Liam pleaded trying to say something but I shut him up shaking my head.
"How could you say that?" I mumbled. "After everything I've been through. How could you?"
"I'm sorry. Annie I'm so sorry" Liam was endlessly apologizing now, looking like he was about to cry himself. "I wasn't thinking."
"No. But you said it Liam" I whispered, breathing in deeply trying to keep calm.
"I regret it, I'm sorry" he replied, taking a hold of my arm.
I wrenched it from his grip. "Get away from me" I ordered him quietly, but he didn't listen he got closer again trying to comfort me. "I said get away from me" I told him stronger this time and more angry sounding.
He tried to speak again but I cut across him, my voice nearly classified as shouting. "Go away! Get out!"
He stepped back looking quite weary of me now. I took a deep breath, looking at him completely hurt with what he had said. I had not expected him to say that. Liam was nice, the real Liam wouldn't have said that. But he did.
Tears were splashing down my face now.
I didn't let him finish screeching before I could stop myself "I don't ever want to see you again!" And then I slapped him across the face, hard, my hand stinging painfully from the impact.
He stumbled back, looking struck and bewildered. He clutched his face where I had slapped him and I felt the impulse to do it again, but stopped myself.
"Get out of here!" I yelled and then he rushed to the door, not needing telling twice.
"I'm sorry" I heard him say before he left. "I'll go."
I dropped to my knees, crying hard, my hand hurting, my head hurting, my heart hurting, everything hurting.