I wake up on my bed, listening to the birds singing just outside my window. I stand up and fix my bed. Tissues are everywhere, my head hurts. I can still feel the pain. Sunday mornings would've been livelier if Larah was still... No. I shouldn't think stuff like this so early in the morning. I shake my head and slap my cheeks. I yawn loudly, stretching like a rubber. The mirror that's in front of me right now, it's full of stickers and photos of me and Larah. I didn't even get to say goodbye... I start to tear up and cry silently. The pain.. the agony.. the loneliness. It's so frustrating! One thing that hurts the most is that I have to act normal anytime soon and forget about her. No. I will never forget about her. But I have to move on. Accept the fact that she's... gone.
I need to take a breather. That thought give me an idea to jog every morning to ponder. Lots of thinking makes my mind scramble and I'd get puzzled.
Before I knew it, two weeks have passed. Yet, I still feel lonely and agitated. I even forgot that I got rejected by the man I love. Damn.. losing a friend is a lot more painful that getting your heartbroken and not being able to capture a guy's heart. I'm walking all alone to and from school. I didn't listen during class these past few days. Too busy thinking about what I'm going to do now since my only friend is gone. Larah is the only person I hung out with. Hanging out with many people is a drag. You'll never know when they're going to back-stab you. So now, I spent my lunch and recess alone in the grass area.
Thinking about all these, I can't breath properly. My heart beat is pounding so loud. I run as fast as I can towards the lake. Our place. It's the only thing that connects me with Larah other than the pictures. I can calm down now. Thank god, I sigh at ease. I'm going to take a nap...
♫ RING ♫ RING ♫ RING ♫ RING ♫
The ring-tone resonates along the lake. I'm going to ignore it for now. Yet, it still didn't stop the caller from calling me. Then, after five attempts, I receive a text. It's from Jenny. Oh and the person who was calling me was Jenny too. Hah. Why would she be calling me?
The text says:
Where the hell are you?!
I HEARD YOU SLAPPED MOTHER!? What kind of a child slaps their own mother?!
Anyway, I have news! Come home quickly!!!
Right. She wasn't at home at that time. I guess she was really busy for work. I wonder where she went.
What does she mean 'what kind of a child slaps their own mother'?? I have the right to get angry at her. She was bad mouthing my own best friend at the day of her funeral and she clearly did that on purpose.
I have been thinking about this for a while and I've come into a conclusion. I'm not even part of the family, anymore. Everyone just treat me as an outsider. Even though they try so hard to hide it, I just get those kind of 'vibes' every time I'm near them.
I don't want to go home yet. But.. can't be helped. I stand up and I slowly take small steps as I imagine what might happen when I get home.
Mother will slap me in the face and shout at me about how I rudely talk to her in that manner.
Then, Jenny will tell me about that news she was referring to. She got requested to be a main character on a movie and will be going to America.
By the time I get home, everyone (except father, who's currently at work) will be at the dinning table waiting for me. Silently. Jenny suddenly tells me that she's going overseas to work.
Jenny is 5 years older than me, she was born in 1994 and I was born in 1999. Although, I kind of forgot what the date of her birthday is. Well it doesn't matter to me. She hates me too anyway.
And to have a perfect family, members in the family should be perfect too right? Jenny is smart, really beautiful and sporty. Also, she's an international model and actress. Last year, she was recruited by a well-known photographer to be a model because he was attracted to her scarlet hair with her pale complexion. Then, with just one photo, she became famous. Having twenty million views within a month, she was recognized by most directors. Amazing that she gets to work early at an age of 18. She became an actress right after she became a model. If there's any flaw that she got, it'll be her arrogant attitude.
Compared to me, I'm just a normal sixth grader.
I reach my destination. In front of the big metal gates. The house stand out too much. It's bigger than anyone's in this street. I feel hungry, maybe I really should show up at dinner. I'll just sneak into my room.
I creep through the door next to the gate that's guarded 24/7. Slowly and quietly. I try to peek a little only to see the guard reading newspaper. Thank god, I whisper. I walk slowly yet at a silent pace. It's a relief that no one saw me. I open the kitchen door and softly close it.
"Ahah! Found you!", Jenny shouts. My heart skips a beat. That scared me. "You're finally here. What are you doing all the way back in the kitchen?"
There is a silent moment, I shouldn't say anything. Gradually taking a step back. Jenny spots me and grasp my hand. We hurriedly walk to the living room. She instantly open the door which made my mother startle. Jenny looks at me and gives me a smile I have never seen before. I'm speechless because of this sudden act.
"I have good news! Mother already agreed so now I just have to talk to you about it.", Jenny says as she sit on the couch.
"Wait, huh? What's this about?" I question.
"I just came back from New Zealand and I received a phone call. I got hired to be a leading character for a new movie in America!!", Jenny happily shouts. "I also have other jobs to take in New York. So they said that I should consider living there."
"Oh... I'm happy for you! Now can I go eat dinner?", I want to get out of here. I don't care at all.
Jenny suddenly grabs my wrist. "You didn't let me finish yet. I want you to come with me!"
Surprise by what I'm hearing, I'm thinking if this is a joke. I wonder why she wants me to come. I stare at her and god knows what kind of expression I'm wearing right now.
She's stares back with a shocked look. "I've... never seen you show this expression. You're always so emotionless towards us so.. this is the actually first time I've seen you have another look other than your poker-face."
I gulp hard, at a loss for words. Jenny starts to laugh and pats my shoulder, "You thought that we hated you right?! I may act like an egotistic person-"
"You are an egotistic person.", I interrupt.
"Now now. Don't interfere with what I'm trying to say."
She pats me in the head and hastily rub her palm against it.
"Ow..." I glare at her. "So? Continue..."
She holds my hand and say, "I heard all about it. So.... I thought that you need to start fresh! You've been through so much. I know It's not in my character to say these but... you're my dear little sister. And I already got this attitude when I was just a child. I too have been through a lot. I lost my dad, my family went bankrupt, my mum almost committed suicide. So I'm sorry for the inconvenience. I'm not perfect. Not everyone is. So.. I don't hate you. Mother might act like it but she can't trust people anymore, then she found your dad. I was happy for her. But it's not like we came here for money. Nuh-uh. We ain't those kind of low-lives."
I look at mother's direction and she was taking a sip at her tea and looking at the news paper. I'm still confuse by all these but still, I just can't accept this so quickly.
"I don't need your sympathy!!", I exclaim. "So you're saying that, all these time... You were faking your characters?!! Is that what you're saying!? When I was upset. Lonely. Heartbroken. You didn't give a damn at all!!"
"I'm truly sorry about our acts. We thought... you hated us too and I know that deep down in your heart, you can't just trust people like us who just popped out of nowhere in your life. It's also the first time I've ever had a sister. So I didn't know what to do. Plus.. you've never shown anything other than your poker-face", Jenny apologize with an worry look. "I'm really! Really! Sorry! I'll make it up for you! So.. please come with me. I'm doing this for you!"
"My manager says it's okay for you to come with us. I've spoken to mother about it and she also agreed about you starting new in New York City! Can you believe that?! A city that never sleeps! You and I are going to experience such a blissful place!"
Wow just like what I imagined. Well not really. Scene 1 wasn't like this nor Scene 2. But whatever. Now's not the time to think about that.
I flop down on the floor. "I.... don't know about this. I mean... Uh, it's almost the end of term and I'm going to be in high school. But is it really okay!? With mum and dad?"
"Don't worry! Dad already bought us an apartment in the city. Also, you've been already accepted by a private school. A school only for rich students! So don't worry too much!", Jenny giggles.
"When are we-"
"Next month!", Jenny finishes with a happy face. As if she knew that I was going to ask that.
"WHAT?! Right after New Years??"
"Haha. Sorry but my manager planned everything already. And even if you had said no, you won't have any other choice because look! I already have the tickets right here", Jenny takes it out from her handbag. She winks at me and sticks her tongue out.
I'm really speechless right now... I thought they all hated me! Ah... probably because of my cold attitude that I unconsciously gained. But... I never thought that Jenny would be able to sum it up. And mother?? Why would she act like that all these years? What the hell is going oooonnnnnnn~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Play the song~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~