Behind that smile

They told him he was worthless
Girls rejected him
All he wants are friends
His mother died last week
His fathers in jail
He lives with his cousin
Tears fall down
He cuts his wrists
He takes the pills
He sleeps peacefully with the angels

(I made that poem about suicide) ^^


12. NIALL!

Niall's POV

They decided to keep me 10 extra days for my knee surgery but now I'm completely finished with the hospital and I'm finally leaving in my car. Harry got Lucy to pick me up in my car. When I got out the man started talking to me and I jut talked along an then I saw one of the fans take a photo of me. "I gotta go sorry!" I say to the man and wobble to my car and get into te passenger seat. "Hi Lucy!"

"Hey Niall!" She gives me a hug. "I missed you!" She giggles. You can tell she's a very loyal friend and has a very beautiful personality. "You're my only friend." I say quickly. "I know Niall, it will get better. You're my best friend!" We have a really nice conversation while she drives us home. But finally we're home and I struggle into the house. "Oh look it's suicide boy!" Liam laughs. I just go to my room. And lock the door. I get a text from Lucy. "Hey Niall wanna text?"

"Yeah sure."

"How are you feeling? Like seriously."

"Depressed, hurt, unwanted, worthless, ugly and stupid. You're my best friend and I thank you for every thing you've done. Goodbye Lucy."

Harry's POV

Lucy was texting someone and she broke out into tears and started hyperventilating. I rush over to her. "Lucy what's wrong?" She pushes me away and runs to her room and locks it.

Lucy's POV

Niall's going to try to kill himself again?? If he's unsuccessful this time God know what will happen to him. I sink down to the floor and call Nikki. "Hello Nikki?"

"Oh hello Hun are you crying?"

"Look we all have a confession to make... The boys threatened me not to tell Niall you were still alive. He cried through the concerts, he cut his wrists 305 times and he tried to commit suicide 1 time and he's trying again!"

"What seriously?" She starts crying. "Get off the phone and bash his door down now!!" I hang up and run to his bedroom door and start banging on it. Eventually I give up and slide down the door and cry into my knees. "Oh there you are!" Harry runs to my side. "What's wrong?" I slap him across the face. "You boys! You killed Niall!"

"I didn't murder Niall!"

"You guys bullied him and now he's dead!" Harry smashes the door down and Niall's bathroom door is wide opened. And there lies Niall. Lifeless. Cold. And I think dead. "NIALL!" I fall to my knees. And walk to him on my knees. "Niall." I whisper. "Harry get him to the hospital now!" Harry nods and carries him to the car and I sit in the backseat with Niall and play with his hair. "It'll be alright Niall, just wake up! Nikki's alive you know? We kept it from you and I'm soo sorry for not telling you. I said I was your best friend! I'm pathetic. Best friends don't keep stuff from their best friend it's not right. Just wake up!!!" I cry into my jumper sleeve. I look up and I see Harry's face in the mirror. It's full of hurt. "I'm sorry as well Niall. I should've been better. I hate myself for how I treated you. I'm a disgusting person and I feel worthless right now and I wish I was the one dying." He focuses his eyes on the road so he doesn't have to make eye contact with me. Niall's still breathing slowly and every 10 seconds his breathing stops for 15 seconds. When we reach the hospital Niall is carried by Harry quickly inside the building. The lady at the front desk looks at Niall and starts typing really fast on her computer. Then out of nowhere doctors rush out and take Niall. "You need to stay in the waiting room. The boys all come down to the waiting room and sit down next to us. They all look disappointed in them selves but sorta happy about them selves. 5 hours later a doctor comes in. "are you guys close to Niall?" They all nod and I stand up. "NO YOU'RE NOT YOU GUYS ARE THE REASON FOR THIS!" I pull the doctor around the wall. "How is he?"

"I'm soo sorry. He didn't make it."

"Okay." I walk out slowly and Harry walks with me. "is he okay?"

"NO!" I snap at Harry. "Get the hell away from me!" I shout and I run away and start going any where. It's dark and I have no idea where I am. I couldn't help it I broke down, I fall to my knees and layed on the pathway. My best friend is gone. I decide to call Nikki. "Nikki?"

"Hey babe, is Niall alright?"

"He's dead." I burst into tears again. "You're lying!"

"No I'm not! Why would I lie about something so horrible?"

"I'm going to fly over." Nikki says and hangs up. I hate myself for not doing something.

Nikki's POV

I wanted to be strong in front of Lucy but as soon as I hung up on her I fell to the ground and cried for hours and looked for plane tickets.

*skip a week*

Louis' POV

It's been a week since Niall's death and it's his funeral today. Nikki flew over and she won't talk to me. She's getting ready for the funeral in her room. "Nikki?"



"It's fine."

"It's not fine you don't forgive me I can see in your eyes. I'm sorry for every thing! I hate myself now I want to die. I'm worthless I'm a worthless bully, I'm a dick head and I'm a loser I don't deserve to be in One Direction I was wrong and I will never forgive myself."

"Just get out." She shakes her head.

Nikki's POV

"We're all gathered here today to remember Niall James Horan." He nods at Lucy and she comes up to the microphone. "Niall was my best friend. He helped me when I was getting treated bad and he was the kindest person you could ever meet. He didn't deserve any of this and to the 10 fans that got tickets to his funeral today you guys had an amazing idol."

"We're not here for Niall we're here to meet the boys." Lucy squints at the girls. "Get out."


"Get out! You're part of the reason he's done this! You're losers! You're bullies and you killed my best friend. Now get the hell out of here before I get you out myself!" The girls run out and Lucy goes back to her seat. It's my turn to speak. "Me and Niall loved each other and I'm going to miss his cute little laugh, his amazing sense of humour and how innocent he was. I'm going to miss my lover. All this time he was bullied by people that were supposed to be supporting him and encouraging him. But instead they beat him up, called him names, verbally bullied him and discouraged him. I loved him more than any one in the whole entire world." I step down the stairs and go back to my seat. The funeral was depressing. Niall was soo perfect and now he's up in heaven.

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