I cant see anything but Lauren's brown eyes swell up big in what looks like fear more than anything else. She fears what is happening right now and so do I. Lauren's mouth is open wide and so are her eyes, she hasn't let go of the handle on my front door, shes stiff.
"Im sorry" She says finally after an eternity of torture. Virginia isn't kissing me anymore, she stopped when Lauren walked in but shes still breathing into my neck in soft giggles. I slide from underneath her sickening touch and reach out for Lauren but she jerks away and shakes her head.
"I was just going" She whispers. Her pretty brown eyes are glossy now although I'm not sure why they would be. Her and I have just become friends and she said herself she barely knew me. Of course she wants to know more, a blind man could see that much in her ambitious attitude but now she looks like she wants to be as far away from me as she can.
"No please don't" She stops and looks at me with her eyebrows pulled closely together. She shakes her fast and steps out of my door and bounces herself down my steps. I cant see her face anymore but she whips her nose or eyes with her sleeve as she walks away. I want to yell for her to come back but I don't want to scare her. My face wrinkles up in a way that it would if I were to smell something really bad and I let out a muffled groan.
"Get out of my house" I say with my eyes closed to the girl with bright orange hair, its natural you can tell by her fair skin and light freckles across the bridge of her nose.
She only smirks. "I got what I want" She says and with that walks around me and out of my home sleazily switching her hips as she walks down my steps just as Lauren did only minutes ago.
My flat is empty now when I close the door, Ethan will be over soon with Talia and as glad as I am that they are coming I'm not happy yet. I ask myself if happiness is even real, sure you can feel proud or good for a little bit but when you are by yourself or just are able to peel your head out of the clouds theres no such thing. The feeling is suffocating and makes me angry that I have to feel this way, I hate feeling this way and I can almost bet no one else feels how I do. Its because I'm broken and disgusting no one wants to fix me because Im alone and unwanted. Fuck, I want to be wanted.
Im sorry about what you saw, I didn't recognize her until she was in my door. Please don't be upset with me, come over.
Shit now I sound like I'm desperate since I'm begging for her to come over and just talk to me. I am desperate but id rather not everyone knows about that. I stare at my phone for a dreadfully long time before I finally get a text.
We will be over in a few okay? be ready!
Of course the text isn't from her. Why would it be? And why do I care so much? Its not like shes all that matters to me. I should focus on my real friends coming over and hanging out with me instead of her. Shes not the one I'll be focusing on tonight I tell myself over and over until finally I'm okay with that.
Harry, Harry Styles is such a weird topic. Id like to say that we are the same way as a fairy tale, where the prince and princess meet and get married a few minutes later. Its silly to think that though because its obvious we are anything but a fairy tale and this is as real as real life gets. He's handsome and charming, I think he's intriguing because of his past but also because of the way he speaks, so slow and drawn out with a thick accent that makes my stomach freeze. He's so clueless though, he has no idea what he's getting himself into and so when I saw him kissing Virginia I just sort of froze. I know who she is, Ive lived here for a year now and actually moved here with my boyfriend. Its funny because this town is small and you cant just get away from the people you hate because they are everywhere. Anyways she took him and I was a complete mess for so long after, maybe its insane to say that when I saw her pressed up against Harry my insides turned to mush and all I could do was run away but thats exactly what happened.
I get a text from Harry just as I make it home, he wants me to come back to his house probably so he can explain but thats exactly what I don't want. I don't want a repeat of what Jeremy had told me when I caught him lying underneath of her touch, I want to be left alone.
I sigh and pick up the last of my dirty clothes from my bedroom floor and put it into the hamper I have in my hallway, Ive decided that now would be a good time to clean to keep myself distracted and also because Sam is coming to stay with me in only three days now. Once she is here we will have a week to do any last minute shopping and planning for collage and then she and we will start school together. Harry will be there too, and if I would have to guess then Id say so will Ethan and Talia. I need to keep him out of my head and I know its stupid for me to be so invested on someone who couldn't care less.
My head hurts. I pick up the laundry basket on my way to the laundry room and dump the small collection into the washer then pull out the compartment for the soap. I pour it in and close it again twisting the knob and pulling it out. The washer begins its growling sounds as it cleans my clothes and I leave the basket in the room before going to look for some headache medicine.
I told myself after I dated Colby that I wouldn't be the girl to easily in love again because love almost doesn't exist. I believe that the generations we are in have grown so distant from whats important that all we focus on is sex and drugs, thats so high school and I'm over it. Im so dumb for thinking I could ever have a happy ending.
My phone rings and I hold my breath picking it up then let it out when i see its sam calling.
"Hello" I say putting my phone between my ear and shoulder as I reach in my cabinet for the pain medicine.
"Hey! Just wanted to let you know I'm done packing, Im so excited Lauren, I miss you so much and I cant wait to meet this Harry you've been talking about" great, just what I need.
"Samantha" I sigh and open a water bottle and wash the pills down my throat. "I don't know about him anymore, he might be interested in someone else" My heart feels absolutely helpless as I reopen my wound and basically pour salt into it. How stupid is this? Im not in love, I never was. He is trouble and thats exactly what I don't need especially while I'm in a completely different country than any of my family or friends. Im alone.
No one speaks as I get myself comfortable on my cloth covered brown couch and cover up with a quilt my grandma had knitted me years ago. "What do you mean"
"I'll tell you later, I'm tired I should probably go to sleep. I'll text you okay?" I don't wait for Sam to answer. Instead I hang up and cover my face with my hands letting out a long breath. Don't think about Harry okay Lauren? No more Harry.
omg im sorry this is awful, anyways i didnt know what to write next at all so its probably gonna be in Laurens POV mostly from here on out, please favorite and like this add it and comment! tell your friends if people like it ill continue