I half-expected him to run up to me and gather me in his strong,strong arms and plant his lips on me and then we'd make out. Well, at least I wanted that to happen.
Instead, he exhaled semi-loudly, his face unreadable, scratched his head out of habit,not like it was itchy and finally sat on the seat across me. He sat with his knees wide apart, his elbows resting on each of his knees, bent down slightly,his hands locked together, hanging between his knees. He stared at his hands for a long time before his eyes finally looked up to meet mine.
"Why are you here?" His voice was empty of emotion.
I swallowed, my throat suddenly feeling dry. "I don't want to live with regrets. If I left, I'd be leaving a whole lifetime behind me. If I stayed..."
"I don't want to hold you back. You don't need to feel obligated to try."
I felt a heat swelling inside of me. I marched over to where he was sitting and got down on my knees,holding his hands in mine.
"I want this," I said, my voice strong and steady. "I didn't know what I wanted before. But what I know now is, I want YOU,Niall. I don't know what may happen in the future but I know that I want this," I squeezed gently,"I want us."
Cautiously, as his eyes stayed on mine, I placed my hand gently on his cheek, his skin warm against my cold,clammy hands. I could imagine it might not have been a pleasurable sensation to experience but I wanted him to believe me. I needed him to believe me. I didn't realise how much he meant to me until now. It mattered what he thought of me and how he felt about me even if we weren't together, no matter how much I wanted us to be, something I didn't realise till now.
His lips parted, his breathing shallow.
I pressed my lips to the corner of his mouth and he froze,suddenly still.
I continued to move my lips to meet his since he didn't push me away.
I began to feel a response as his hands that were under one of mine relaxed. I pulled away to look down at our hands as I took one of his hands in mine,our fingers interlocking. I looked up at him, only to find him looking at me,his eyes soft and warm as I felt his hand travel up my arm and to my cheek as he gently guided my lips back to his. We kissed, slowly, gently, taking our time. Our lips moved in unison, it felt as if they were pieces in a puzzle.
Eventually, we had to pull away to breathe. I was feeling giddy, the tingling sensation on my lips still palpable even though his lips had left mine. I wanted more.
And I could tell he did too, his eyes full of a new hunger.
He pressed his lips to mine, hard and I didn't back away. I wasn't afraid anymore, I was excited.
I could sense how much he wanted, what he wanted. I kissed him just as hard, our lips dancing in synchronisation. My body shivered slightly as his tongue traced my lower lip, my lips parting as a result.
Our bodies were pressed close together as I found myself on his lap, his hands were at my sides,my legs were folded up behind me as my body rested on his thighs.
"We should...go...room," I suggested breathlessly,barely able to speak as his lips left a trail of kisses along my jawline and to my neck, it was hard to concentrate.
He acknowledged by making a grunt that would have made me laugh if I wasn't so bothered by his lips.
I returned my lips to his, our kisses now more forceful and passionate, hungry.
He stood up suddenly, and positioned my legs to wrap around him with one hand as he brought us to his bedroom. We had stopped along the hallway, him pushing me against the wall as our lips never left each other's. My fingers were buried in his hair as we stumbled to the bedroom and he placed me on my back,on the bed.
I crawled on my elbows to a more comfortable position so that our legs wouldn't dangle off the bed. I watched in fascination as he took his shirt off,throwing it aside, his eyes fixed on mine the whole time. He crawled on top of me and crashed his lips to mine as I fumbled with the hem of my shirt. He helped me sit up and pull of my shirt, also throwing it aside. As he knelt, studying my body, I reached for his belt which he also took off in a flash.
I pulled him beside me and got on top of him, leaning down to kiss him again,never seeming to get enough. I ran my hands along his abdomen,lingering at the lower region, his breathing ragged and heavy. He surprised me by sitting up suddenly,catching me before I fell.
"I love you," he whispered,suddenly gentle as he kissed my shoulder.
I think I love you too, I replied in my mind as I pushed him down onto the bed.