Draco Malfoy and the Better-Than-Potter's-Broomstick

The sequel to Draco Malfoy and the Rejected Handshake. Join Draco as he embarks on his hilarious second year at Hogwarts through numerous scrapbook entries. Made for laughs. Enjoy! XD


4. Truth or Dare

A Game of Truth or Dare begins with Draco asking Goyle.

Goyle chooses truth.

Draco: "Describe your most embarrassing moment?"

Goyle grunts.

Draco: "Well?"

Goyle: "When I agreed to playing this game. M-Millicent Bullstrode... Laughed at me!! She said it was for girly loser Hufflepuffs..."

Draco: "Since when do you care what MILLICENT BULLSTRODE thinks?!" 

Goyle: "Uh...."

Draco: "Is this a minor tiny little crush my fantabulous twenty first sense detects? (Twenty first sense. Because the sixth sense is SO overrated.)

Goyle: That's a truth question! I've already had my go... Let's move on to another topic... Um... Er.... You know... Those giant yellow duck slippers Dumbledore was wearing today were surprisingly... Erm... Tasteful?

Draco: Isn't it funny that Millicent has a pair almost the exact same?

Crabbe: Wow! What a strange coincidence!


Draco: Yeah, it's Crabbe's turn... So Goyle you're picking truth again, right?

Goyle: Wait, what?!

Crabbe: Yeah, what?!This is NOT FAIR. I thought it was my go! 

Crabbe goes to sulk in the corner but is quickly distracted by the hair extensions on Draco's bed side table.

Draco: Come on Crabbe... You know you can tell me anything.... I am REALLY REALLY HONESTLY TRUSTWORTHY...... Promise!

Goyle: Well...

Draco: Well?

Goyle: Well...

Draco: Well???

Goyle: Well...

Draco: Wella Wella Wella HUH! Tell me more, tell me more - Was it love at first sight? Tell me more, tell me more - Did you notice my tasteful reference to Greece?! 

Goyle: I haven't even told you that I fancy Hermione yet....

Draco/Crabbe (now back from the corner with hair extensions) : WAIT, WHAT?!

Goyle: Joking. My heart belongs only to fair sweet Millicent...

Draco: Really? Just wait till everyone else hears about this!!!! You'll be the laughing stock of the school!! RMIUL!!!!!!!!! (Riding my imaginary unicorn laughing)

Goyle begins to sob with humiliation but then falls into a deep, tearful slumber.

Goyle now needs to ask Crabbe but is inconveniently asleep.

Crabbe chooses dare.

Goyle is on the verge of dozing off.

Draco: "Goyle! Crabbe chose dare!"

Goyle shoots up.

Draco: "Goyle!"

Goyle: "What?"

Draco: "Dare him to do something!"

Goyle: "Uh... I dare you to let me sleep,"

Crabbe: "Ok, then. Sleep."

Draco sighs.

Goyle fall back to sleep.

Crabbe asks Draco.

Draco chooses dare.

Crabbe: "I dare you to talk continuously for a minute... in rhymes!"

Draco: "Ok! I love rhyming!"

Crabbe: "That didn't rhyme..."

Draco: "Ok, here we go,

Ow! I just stabbed my toe!

I wish my PansyWansyWansyWoo

Was here to kiss my bruises too!

I like banana peels

not to eat, but to... uh... make deals?

Don't ask me what deals to make,

I don't know, for heaven's sake!

Harry's such a Potty head,

Popsicle says he'll end up dead.

The Dark Pizza has some plan,

to come back with a possible tan!

I'm excited, if you can't tell.

Weasel and Mangy'll cry. Oh well!

Oh! My bruise is still hurting like mad

Wow! My rhyme's actually not bad!

Ew! Goyle's drooling all over me!

I gotta go wipe it on a tree.

Is my minute finished yet?

That must be a no, knowing me, I'll bet! 

I have to stop. I'm giving in.

Alright then. Crabbe, you win.


Crabbe: Yay! I win! You lose!

Draco: How long was that?

Crabbe: 59 seconds...

Draco: Oh My Dark Pizza! I was just a second off!

Crabbe: Haha! You lose!

Draco: Ok, ok! I gotta go wipe Goyle's drool off on the tree now... 


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