9. taste of happy
"Yeah deni! Anything" I smiled at her having no clue what was happening. "Well. It's about uhm. Mental illness..." She said. Damnit. "Look Deni...I know it's-" she cut me off. "let me finish please." I nodded at her still nervous. "Well. For the last couple of years..I've been struggling with. Self harm. And eating disorders...and depression. An it's all because of a stupid boy that I haven't seen in forever and I have no idea why I'm telling you this because I've never told anyone. It's just....I feel like I can trust you and I do." She finished letting out a big sigh. I say there in shock. My mouth was hanging open. "Oh god. I shouldn't have told you that..I can understand if you want to switch dorms for someone sane. Ugh I'm so fucking stu-"she began to groan before I ran over to her and hugged her as tight as I could and began sobbing. "Deni. Oh god. I...me too. All of it. Jesus I didn't think anyone would understand." I blubbered. I hast let myself break down I front of anyone like this since the hospital with Ryan several years ago. I liked it. It felt so good. "Really? Oh my god Keaton. That's so strange that both of us are the same like that...but...we needed up as roommates too? God we must have done something amazing to deserve this!" She smiled while crying. "I know...thank god I can talk to someone who understands!" We sat down after collecting ourselves and told out stories. All of them this time. I found out that Deni was bi sexual and I was fine with it. Honestly our stories were very similar except what we did to escape the pain. She tried to become friends with everyone and slept around a lot. Like a different person every night. We continued to talk all day and actually missed the lessons today. Even though it was the first day we didn't care. I told her about Harry and all the way up to this morning. We really opened up to each other. That night I slept really well knowing a burden was lifted from my shoulders.
The next morning we got up at 8:00 am. We showered and put on our normal makeup. We always wore it. Neither of us were comfortable without it. She dressed in black leggings and a long sleeved t shirt. Some gray thing from a marathon probably. She threw on some white keds and sat down. I put on my black leggings and a dark blue sweatshirt with a large hood. I threw on my black converse high tops, grabbed my brown leather bag and motioned to Keaton saying I was ready. We headed outside of the dorm and walked to speech together. Man we got lucky. We litterally had all of our classes together except for one! By the time speech was over Keaton left for drama and I headed to performing arts.
It was boring at first but our teacher dr. Jones was nice enough. I was also in a good mood today because of my heart to heart with Deni. "Ms. Liles. Would you like to share with the class your musical talent?" Hah talent? "Well I wouldn't call myself talented..but I sing and play the acoustic guitar." He smiled at me. "Lovely. We acctually have some guests coming and if your not sure that your talented, they can tutor you some! I'm sure all of you will love him!" Oh god. Ugh more people to hear how god awful I am. Really?