15. Over Again
I open my eyes and blink a few times before the blurriness goes away. I look around the room and I am by myself. And I am not on the floor anymore, I'm on the couch. Covered in a blanket. And no one is in the room. I'm by myself and the boys are yet to be found. Suddenly all of last night's events come flooding back to me and I remember that they saw my scars... And my new cuts. And I told them how they literally saved my life. Shit. What is going to happen now? Are they going to realize that I am not worth it and just dump me on the street somewhere in London? God I hope not. I hear some talking from somewhere in the house and it sounds like the boys. I follow the voices until it leads me to the kitchen. Figures. I lean up against the door. "I had no idea she cut herself mate! You didn't say that." Harry. "I didn't know!" Liam. He sounded angry. I wonder why... "She is so beautiful, why would no guys ask her out? She is a princess." My cheeks flushed at this comment. I am not pretty, and I am defiantly not beautiful or a princess. "Niall..." Liam growled. I wonder what is up his ass. Why does he care what they say about me? "Well she is fit, mate. It doesn't matter if she is your-" "Harry!" Liam again. What was that about? His what? I had hardly talked to Liam. I couldn't possibly be anything of his. "Sorry, Li." They continued talking for a few more minutes and then there was silence. I was thinking about how in the whole time I only heard four voices- I never heard Zayn, when big hands wrapped themselves around my waist. I felt hot breath on my neck, next to my ear and they said, "You know princess, it isn't nice to eavesdrop." Zayn. Ugh, I could feel his smirk against my neck. I tried to push him away from me but he held me tight and pushed me into the kitchen. Everyone was staring at me and for the first time, I was glad I was wearing this ridiculously over-sized sweatshirt and sweats and that Zayn was there. Because I could bury myself in his chest and pretend that their stares didn't bother me. And I did just that. I think my action surprised everyone because when I looked up again, everyone was staring at me with their mouths open, a shocked expression on their face. Even Zayn. And then my cheeks went up in flames and I shook Zayn off of me. Everyone was still staring at me so i made a move to leave but Niall grabbed my arm before I could walk out. "We need to talk, Em." Harry said gently. I gulped. This couldn't be good. Ever since I got here, the only thing he had called me was 'princess'. Not Emma, not Em. Just princess. I sat down on one of the stools and Louis placed a plate of food in front of me. The boys came and sat down arranging themselves around the table, near and next to and across from me. I was scared for what came next. I never told anyone about me cutting myself because I didn't want anyone to know and I had always been scared of what people would say to and about me. I guess I was going to find out now. They all looked at me like they expected me to say something. Nah uh, I was not starting this conversation. I didn't even want to have this conversation. I looked down. "Emma.." Liam said softly. I looked up. "Why?" All of them looked at me with hurt eyes. Like they cared. "I told you why." I mumbled into my lap. "You told us why you... why you cut before. And then you told us that you stopped and haven't down it recently. You never told us why you did it yesterday." I don't know why but this made me mad. Like what the hell? Who are you to question what I do? "Why the hell do you care? Did you ever think it was because I got fucking kidnapped. Did you ever think about that? I did three cuts. One for being ugly. One for being fat. And one for being alive. And all of them were for being stupid enough to get kidnapped." I lost. I totally blew up. I screamed my head off and I was pissed. I almost feel bad for the next person who says anything even slightly sassy to me. I looked around at them, looking them all dead in the eye and when it was oblivious that they weren't going to say anything. I stormed out of the room, up the stairs, into my room, and after I slammed the door, I flopped on the my bed and screamed into my pillow. And then I heard the door open and close. But I didn't look up, I didn't want to see or talk to any of them. I felt the mattress dip down because of the weight being added to it. Five times.