Graduation is approaching.
It seems like it just keeps coming faster and faster. And the less of time I have with Parker and William.
You can believe I am scared to tell Parker. But it's for the best. There's just one thought that I can't get out of my head.
The promise I made to William.
I know that Parker will find out somehow and will hate me for it.
It feels like a race for time. I want to see who comes first and I just want to see my outcome. Hell, maybe I'm just better alone. Way less drama and less time to think about it.
So the people who provides the caps and the gowns was at the school today.
When I was getting mine, I ran into someone not looking.
"Sorry." Then the person turned around.
"It's fi-" Amanda.
"Ah. How are you doin slut?"
She didn't say anything. Just got her cap and gown and walked away.
Ah, feels good to have someone not insult you back. I'm certainly not gonna insult people. She deserves it.
I stepped up to the table, "Lola Pritchards." I told the man.
He pulled a box with a black P marked on it.
He pulled the maroon and gold outfit out and handed it to me. I thanked him and went back to my dorm.
The elevator opened everyone was in their caps and gowns. Everyone looks towards me and gave me warm smiles.
"Hey babe." Parker walked up and kissed me.
"Hey Mr. Fancy." He laughed. "Go put your outfit and gown on!" I laughed and jogged to my room.
I pulled my graduation outfit out and started to get dressed and did my hair and make up. (@LeaneSamantha) I put my cap and gown and left my room.
"I'm here." Parker picked me up and twirled me around...I'm gonna miss that.
Oh, I'm gonna end us tonight. Graduation is Friday and and today is Wednesday. So my time is running out.
We sat on the couch with everyone else and we started talking.
"Have you finished your speech?" Kaitlyn asked me.
The deen and principal asked me if I could write a speech to read at graduation about my experience here.
You would think that I would turn that down. I was actually excited about it. Also, Rose and Steven is flying in and coming to graduation.
Rose still doesn't know the whole story. But she will Friday.
"I've had it finished for a while now. When deen asked me, I started writing that night. He said you can make it as long as I want to. That would take forever, so I made it long, but not to long. I cried every time I worked on it. And I know for a fact that I will cry when I read it"
"Well, we'll make sure to bring tissues." She laughed. We all laughed along.
"Are you happy to go back home?" Derek asked me.
"Yeah. I miss home like crazy. But I will also miss you guys so much."
"Well, you're not gonna get rid of us that easy." Trevor spoke up, "we are gonna give you all of our contacts and we will keep in touch. Then, when we're all fifty, we will meet up and complain about how our hair is gonna turn gray." We all laughed.
"Well, I can assure you that my hair is not gonna turn gray. And this face is gonna stay perfect." Angela took some food and ate it.
I took some M&M's and ate some, "okay Ang, keep telling yourself that." I laughed. She couldn't help but to laugh. "Yeah, but there is suck thing as bot aux." We laughed even harder.
We spend the rest of the evening just hanging out and enjoying these last few days.
This precious time is running out and we to make the best of it.
My eyes almost never left Parker's face, also fighting back tears.
Words can not even describe how hard this is gonna be.
I'm gonna miss his smiling face and the twinkle in his eye when he sees me.
I took my outfit off and changed into some sweats and took all my make up off.
I made sure I was one hundred percent clean. I want Parker to see the true me. Without any make up or any fancy outfit.
This is how I would go out normally.
I began to cry walking to his room.
I fought back the tears and wiped my eyes.
I reached his door and knocked four times.
Parker answered, a smile from one end of his face to the other.
It disappeared when he saw my red eyes.
"What's wrong baby." He hugged me.
I rejected it and stepped in the room.
Trevor was sitting on one of their beanbags messing around with his phone. He looked up and smiled at me. He couldn't tell I had been crying a little til I spoke. "Trevor, can you give me and Parker a moment? We need to talk." He looked confused but left the room.
I closed the door and locked it, "what's wrong?" He pulled me onto his bed.
"Parker, these past few months has been the best few months in my entire life. You have made me the happiest girl in the world. It's just a shame we had to meet in our senior year and in Ireland."
"What are you saying." Tears started to form in his eyes and he squeezed my hand tightly.
"With graduation coming up, that means me moving away. There is a four hour time difference. You have already got accepted in the college of your dreams and so have I. We're almost on the opposite side of the world. If we continue to stay together, it will be harder and harder to stay in touch and make time for a relationship. With school and life in general, it will seem almost impossible to keep a relationship like this going."
The look in his eyes were unexplainable. He knew where I was going with this.
"We can try to talk as much as we can, but we can be us anymore. We need to become friends and nothing more. But we can try again after we graduate from college." I took his shaking hands.
"This is not the end, this is not goodbye, this is just a break. A see you later. I will love you forever. You and you only. Just me and you against the world. We will go to infinity and beyond if we wait. We can stay together forever. We can grow old and have kids, it just will have to wait for a little while. Are you willing to accept this?"
I have never seen him cry so hard. I faintly remember seeing him cry when I was almost dead. But this is far worse.
I cupped his cheeks, wiping as many tears as I could from his face. "Yes." He whispered when he crashed his lips onto mine.
We sat there, just moving together, crying together.
His fingers ran through my hair and my hands locked around his neck.
We kissed for as long as we could til we were desperate for air. We took some breaths when our lips connected again.
The tears from both of our eyes flowed into our mouths, making it difficult to stay in one spot.
We touched our foreheads together and just cried our eyes out.
We both started to hiccup, trying to stop crying but it was no use.
"I-I- I underst-and wh-what you are try-y-ying to do. Y-y-yes I a-am. I love you." And we kissed again.
This time, he pushed me down on his bed and was on top of me, our lips still in sync.
His legs trapped me and his hands were firmly on my hips, keeping me still.
My arms were locked around his neck and barely pushing him down on me.
He came up, panting and kissing me over and over.
It got to the point where that we were both to tired to kiss or cry anymore.
"Come on." He pulled me up. He unlocked the door and let Trevor in.
He led me to my dorm and laid me on the bed.
He pulled his shirt off and crawled in with me.
His arms wrapped around me and pulled me to him as close as I could. I buried my head in the crook of his neck and held onto him as hard as I could.
We had two more nights together. I never want this moment to end.