The day after Vic left, I just kind of stayed in bed. I didn't actually cry or anything, but I was definitely hurt inside. I really should have been happy that he wasn’t sleeping with other people, and really I was, but just the fact that he lied to me is what hurt the most. I sighed and got up for the first time in hours. I made myself some coffee and watched some TV. My doorbell rang through my house around noon. I wasn't expecting anyone, but I got up and walked over to the door anyway.
“Hey,” a cheery Jack said when I opened it up.
“Oh, hi,” I mumbled back. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to pick up those shirt designs you did for me and the band.”
“Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. Come in. I’ll go get them.” Jack came in and stood by the couch while I went to go get the designs I put together the day before, right after I’d left Vic’s house.
“Okay, so I made three designs for each logo you made, so you can pick what you like.”
“Thank you. They’re awesome,” he said as he was looking through them.
“How is the band?”
“It’s really good. We’re thinking of going back to Baltimore for a while. We’re going to record up there and visit family and all that stuff. It’s really coming along.” When I looked back up, he was giving me a curious look. “Hey, is something wrong?”
“No.” I was shaking my head. “Why?” I looked back, biting my lip.
“You just look kind of sad, like something might be wrong.” I shook my head again.
“I was just thinking about something. I hope you guys have fun, though. I'm looking forward to the album.”
I ran my fingers through my hair and smiled at him. I felt tears in my eyes, but I blinked those away. I'm such a baby, it's not even funny. “Hey, hey, come here, talk to me,” Jack said leading me to the couch.
“I can’t. It’s stupid and just…” I kept shaking my head. I really didn't know what to do.
“How about this,” he started and made me look at him. “How about I tell you a big secret that no one in our friend group knows, and, in exchange, you tell me what's wrong?” I thought about it for a second.
“I don't know, Jack.”
“Come on, maybe I can help you. I know my maturity isn’t the best, but I can help.” I sighed and chuckled a little bit. He was a funny guy.
“Okay fine... but you first. What’s this big secret?”
“Okay, well, you know my friend Alex? He’s also the singer of the band.” I nodded my head yes.
“He’s the guy that was dry humping you are the New Year’s Party a couple years ago right?” I had only met him once, so I wanted to be sure that that was the guy that he was talking about.
“Yeah... Well... Ever since then, I’ve been dating him.” My eyes went wide. I didn't know Jack liked guys. He always hung out with Justin, so I just figured that they were kinda the same. Jack's always been more accepting, though, and now I know why.
“So you’re gay?” I asked, and he nodded.
“I’ve been dating Alex for about two years.” He smiled at me. “No one knows that because of… well… Justin, really. I wasn’t afraid of what he’d think; I just didn't wanna feel like Alex was any less. Kind of another reason we’re going back to Baltimore. We can just be us and not around anyone that we know.”
“Do you love Alex?” I don't know where that question came from. He paused for a second. It looked like he was thinking.
“Yeah,” he said and nodded sincerely. “I really do. I've known him forever—well, since eighth grade. He makes me happy.” I smiled at him. “So... Now it's your turn. Tell me what's wrong,” he said turning his attention to me.
“Okay... Well... Um... I’ve been seeing this person for the past month or so, and at first I didn't want feelings for them, but they just kind of happened. We got close, and I really, really like him…” I just kind of summed up the whole situation for him.
“Him?” Shit, I didn't mean to say that.
“I—um... I didn't—” He put his hand on my shoulder, stopping me from stuttering.
“It's okay. Continue. You like him, what’s the problem?”
“He lied to me... It wasn't a big lie but... it hurt just to know that he lied to me.”
“What did he lie about?”
“That he wasn't a prostitute. Before you say anything, I'm not mad that he’s not. It just that he lied. I told him something about my past that still really hurts me now, and I lost all trust in people, mainly guys, so I tried being straight, I guess. I know, it sounds so stupid. Then he came along, and I got those feelings back. I really, really like him, Jack. But he lied. About a whole part about what I thought he was.” He squeezed my shoulder a little bit, making me stop my rambling.
“Did he tell you or did you find out somehow from someone else?”
“He told me yesterday at his house. We had a date the night before, and I stayed over. But if he lies about this… won't he lie again?” I could feel myself tearing up again.
“Okay, Kellin,” he turned me so I was facing him and he was facing me, “this guy clearly likes you. If he didn’t, he would have continued the lie. You like him, from what I know... a lot. You should just give this guy a chance. He told you the truth. That’s more than most guys would. You actually looked happy the past couple times I saw you, and I'm assuming that was because of him. And if you're worried about Justin finding out somehow... fuck him. If he can't accept you, then he’s not a real friend. I think you need to invite this guy over when I leave and talk to him. Okay?” I nodded. “Good. Now I have to go. We’re packing.”
“Okay, good luck with Alex and the band.”
“Thanks,” he mumbled. “Good luck with whoever this guy is.” I nodded back at him. He left, and I decided to do what he said. I got out my phone and sent a quick text to Vic.
‘Can you come over?’
‘Yeah. Be over in a few minutes.’ Vic texted back. I just really wanted to apologize to him. I overreacted. Jack was right. He still told me, and that's better than finding out from some random person that I don't know or like.
A few minutes later, Vic knocked on my door and walked in. “Hey,” he muttered and sat on the couch next to me. “I'm really sorry.”
“No. No. It's okay. To be honest, I overreacted. I'm happy that you’re not sleeping with other people.”
“But I lied. You slept with a random stranger that wasn't even part of an agency. You have the right to be mad.”
“I know, I know. But I'm also really happy that I did, though. I met you. And I really, really like you. That's why I called you back to talk to you.” I held his hand. He smiled at me.
“Really?” he asked, hope filling his voice. I nodded. He lifted our hands to his mouth and kissed my hand. “Good because I really, really like you, too, and I'm really sorry for lying.”
“I wanna make things work. That is... if you do, too… and you won't lie about it.”
“I promise.” He smiled and a lightly brushed his lips over mine, but he didn't kiss me. He waited for me to do it, kind of like waiting for my final decision. So I pushed our lips together, kissing him.
His hands were on my face, cupping my cheeks. His soft lips worked against mine. I pulled off of him for a second. “What do you do for a living?” I decided to ask since I actually had no clue.
“I teach guitar.”
“Really?” I smiled. “That’s really cool.”
“Is it better than being a prostitute?” he asked me, teasingly running his hand up and down my thighs.
“Yes,” I bit my lips and kissed him. “But only because I can have you all to myself.” I said and kissed him passionately again. “All mine,” I whispered and kissed him.