I felt terrible. We were in LA for a week now and Harry ignored me ever since the second night. He doesn 't talk to me, he doesn't look at me, he tries to avoid me all the time. But the wierd thing is he seems te feel better, he's hanging out with the other guys all the time. But I came to a point I just couldn't take it anymore, I needed to talk to him.
Harry was sitting at the bar, talking to Liam. 'Harry, can I talk to you?' He didn't react inmidiatly. 'Harry we need to talk.' I tried again. 'What do you want to talk about?' Harry asked annoyed. 'About us.' 'There is no 'us'.' Harry answered. I lost my patience. 'Why are you so fucking rude Styles? You've been ignoring me for days.' 'I'm rude? You are the one that gave up on me, you were the one that didn't care at all, like our relationship meant nothing to you! You were the one leaving me in this mess, you are the one that started dating your fake girlfriend! No I'm not rude, I'm just done with you not caring about me!' Harry kept yelling and I never felt so bad about myself. 'Do you really think I don't freaking care about you? I couldn't do it anymore, it was tearing me apart, having to hide all the time! Modest kept telling me how I make you think you are gay. I saw you in that little pub the other day with a girl, I thought she was your girlfriend! I thought you moved on!' I yelled back, feeling tears form. 'She was Gemma's friend, and she was going to a rough time! But it doesn't matter, it's clear to me it just doesn't work between us, nothing works between us!' That was the moment my heart broke into a million pieces, and I just couldn't hold it anymore. I broke into tears where everyone was looking. 'I fucking love Styles.' I yelled at Harry who looked at me in shock. 'I tried to keep myself together, to look strong. But in reality I'm dying inside! I need you. Kissing Eleanor was a mistake.' I had to stop talking because I was crying too hard. 'I-I-I l-Love y-you.' I stuttered before running of, sobbing loudly.
I decided I needed to go look for Louis. I never saw him like this and I was afraid he was going to pass out. I left Harry at he bar who seemd unable to function. After walking around the hotel for ten minutes I found Louis in a hallway, curled up in a ball. His whole body was shaking and he was crying like there was no tomorrow. Slowly I ran over to him and gentely laid me hand on his arm. He looked up, his normal blue pierced eyes dull and red. His whole face was stuffed and he looked exhausted. 'Louis...' I just took his petite body in my arms and hold him tight. He kept crying and I kept sitting there with Louis in my arms for what must have been two hours. After a long time he seemed to have fallen asleep. Gentely I picked him up and carried him to his hotelroom. Harry was sitting on his bed, crying. I laid Louis in his body and pulled the covers over him. 'I did this.' Harry said. I looked over at Harry. 'I should just leave.' he said, looking down. 'Don't you get it?' I asked. Harry looked at me in confusion. 'Louis needs you, leaving would make everything worse. But I'll let you sleep now.'
I woke up and showered. When I got back, Louis was sitting on his bed. He looked so fragile and little. He sat with his shoulders down, looking at nothing. 'Louis?' He looked up to me. He was exhausted. 'Are you okay?' Louis just shrugged. 'I'm so sorry.' I said, desperate to have a talk with Louis. ''Don't mind it. I'm the one who should say sorry. I gave up on you, and you're worth much better than me.' His voice sounded hoarse and it made me cringe. 'I'm not worth anything.' 'Harry, I'm the one who made you think you are gay, I think it worked because I wanted it so bad and you were so young.' 'I am. Please believe me as I say I never felt attracted to a woman. Maybe a liked someone but I never loved someone but you. You gave me a feeling I never had before and just thought you stopped caring and went on with your life. It seemd so easy for you. You are just such a strong person.' Louis rubbed his forehead. 'Harry...I'm not strong, not at all. I just kept myself together because that's the only way of keeping myself going. I deluded myself I was doing the right thing. I didn't want to cry because I was afraid if I started crying I would never stop.' Louis said, his voice breaking. 'Louis?' 'Yeah?' 'Did you really love me?' 'Do you wanna know that truth?' I nodded. 'I never stopped loving you.'
a/n school is almost starting again so I will propably write less