A lot happened that week. I don't know how it got to this.
(Ruhama, Dominique and Alina text)
"Are you okay?" They asked.
"Yeah I guess I'm fine." I texted back. I wasn't fine at all.
Okay I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's go back to last Monday. All that happened. You already know. Me and John made up and he still loves me.
During lunch, I sat in my usual group with Dakarai, John, and Ruhama. We talked about a lot of things, as always. Then Dakarai brought up me liking Joseph. "Are you gonna tell him" he said motioning to John with a smirk.
John looked at me with a tell-me-what face.
"He already knows" I answered, completely ignoring John.
When lunch ended, we had to line up. John and Dakarai went to the front of the line, as always. Me and Ruhama stayed in our places and guess who was right in front of us? I'll give you one hint. I almost lost John because of him.
He was right in front of us and the tree of us just started talking and hanging out.
Then when we passed John, I felt super guilty.
At the end of the day during dismissal, we were waiting in bus hall.
I was talking with giona.
G: "Your boyfriend gross!"
V: what did he do this time.
G: he and Nick were talking about their D in reading! Notica heard it too!
I didn't say anything because I was grossed out. Ew.
Our little group of four during lunch were just hanging out. We kept talking about anything and well everything. Then we went outside. Let's just say alot happened.
Let's start from the beginning of recess. We were supposed to walk laps but the teacher said we didn't have to. I went over to John. Dominique and Ruhama asked him about what Giona and Notica said. Then they brought Giona over. She said it was true. Then Notica said it was true. Then Nick said it was true too. One thing Giona said to John was "what's up with you! He said he and valeria were in bed for like 4 or 5 hours!" I wanted to slap someone for making that up but I didn't know who.
"I'm so close to giving up." He said in a sort've threatening way.
Then giona said something else.
"That's it I'm done" he said, and walked away with Joseph.
I just looked at him in shock, but he didn't look back.
My heart sank. What did he mean by "I'm done". Did he just break up with me?! I sat on the jungle gym thing. Looking off into nothing, tears forming in my eyes.
I asked Alina and a few other friends if they could go over there and see if he did break up with me. That's what it sounded like anyway.
Next thing you know, Joseph came running up to me, and passed me. When he was close enough to me, he said " I'm john's messenger, and he said he already broke up with you!" He said it in a mocking way. Then my friends came back and said that all John said to them was "I'm done" and walked away.
I sat down again, forcing back the tears. I could barely keep them in, but somehow I managed. The rest of recess is a blur of mixed scenes.
I remember a bunch of people coming over to me asking if they could beat John up and me telling them no. I remember trying to explain everything to Samara but only being able to say "John broke up with me." Then having to bite my bottom lip before bursting into tears. I also remember my friend Ryann, a girl with long blond curly hair and light brown eyes, trying to comfort me and it working for the most part. At least she could make me laugh. And smile, even if it was fake.
Then Ruhama and Dominique came. The first thing I said was "John broke up with me." Then they got all cheerful because they hated John. Alway have always will. I gave them a glare and they automatically saw how hurt I was. I almost burst into tears. Again. Then Dominique said "don't cry over a piece of crap like him." I said ok. Then I realized how many actual friends I have. 8 amazing friends who were there for me. We all walked in a big group to line up to go back in. I noticed John glaring but I just ignored it, not wanting to fight tears back again.
To my dismay, we had to go right behind the trio. ( John, Joseph, and Dakarai). Lucky for me, my good friends were there for me. 4 of them in front of me, separating me from the boys, and one behind me, separating me from everyone else.
Then while passing the door, which John was holding, I looked the other way as if I didn't even care that he broke up with me.
Even though I really, really did.
Then we had a science test in class. To put it short, I almost cried from thinking about it.
Gifted went okay, me laughing and enjoying myself. Even Joseph was being nice ( I didn't expect that at all what-so-ever.).
Then I got bummed out again during bus hall. Again, almost crying, Choking on my words, a big lump In my throat, you know, the usual when you feel like crying.
Then on the bus, I let it out. But not one of those loud, ugly cries. It was more like the type you see in movies. Like starring off into space and quietly a tear rolls down. That's exactly what happened. Well on the bus anyway.
When I got home, I locked myself in the bathroom and broke down in to a long, loud cry. I got up off the floor and looked in the mirror. I was a mess. My hair in my face, cheeks smudged with tears, eyes red and puffy, face was red, etc. I washed my face and put on my best face smile. I walked upstairs and said hi to my parents. My mom said hi and asked why I was sad. Was it really that obvious. I broke down again, not being able to stop crying. They kept asking what was wrong but I just couldn't spit out the words. "John......bro...ke....up....with me" I said, finding it super difficult to talk.
They talked to me for a good half hour and then let me leave. I cried a bit more until I ran out of tears.
I got texts from Dominique, Ruhama, and Alina.
"Are you okay?" They asked.
"Yeah, I guess" I answered. How did my life get so messed up.
I had told Alina I was done with boys. I wasn't sure it was true but for the moment, I didn't want to get hurt again. My heart was literally hurting. I texted Dominique the most.
"I have an idea for revenge." She said.
"Okay. You pretend to be going out with a really cute and smart guy and you two flirt in front of John, then he gets jealous and when he asks you back out, You say I don't date people who treat me like crap."
"Oh wow" I said. Not wanting to do it. And I wasn't gonna do it. But I was gonna show him what he lost.
Then john texted.