My January started out rough like any other directioners with the 'Haylor' kiss. Looking back on it now, I seemed to have over reacted a bit much, but it still hurt a lot. Next, my friend had a birthday party, with the theme of mustaches. It was hilarious bc she's 14 and she has that phase about mustaches; I never had a mustache phase. Nothing else really happened in myJanuary, I guess I never paid attention on how fast the time flew.
My February was a bit rough, it was almost the end of the school year and I have this thing that I have a boyfriend in each school year, so I planned to try and get on of the football players. I also got in a fight with the player's girlfriend, forbidding me from going to the Valentine's Day dance with him, but it didn't really matter, I guess he kind of flirted with all my friends there. The following week was benchmarks and I'm pretty sure I bombed them; I'm not the best at taking tests, especially under pressure!
I spent two weeks of March, before spring break, doing absolutely nothing that I remember of. My mum thinks I may have dimentia, but my doctor said I was fine. Then, come spring break, my mum took me to a therapist for my depression and anxiety, I have both and it's really strange to have something that makes you feel too much and something that makes you feel nothing at all at the same time.
April was when we first returned to school and I thought things were really going for me; the football player asked me out, I joined the cheer squad, I was passing all my classes. Then, two weeks later, the AIMS rolled around; the big state test that every student took. That was when my testing skills were really put into bad use, and then my boyfriend broke up with me and gave me five diffrent reasons why, and I started failing my classes all over again. I wanted to kill myself, honestly.
This was the last month of school, and I had to go to many tutoring lessons and Saturday classes to bring them up to A's and B's again. By the time of promotion into high school, my grades were much better and I think my parents finally felt proud of me for once. After promotion, there was a dance for the student body to go to and I had my last dance with my first best friend, who moved away. And then, my douchey ex-boyfriend tried to ask me out again, but I wouldn't let him say the words because I was done with a boyfriend for that year.
And during summer break before going into high school, my school trip to DC happened; which I have waited for since my oldest brother went during his 8th grade year. I met a cute boy, but sadly, it was only a summer fling. He was going to a different high school than me and it really killed us both. The trip was fun, I took lots of photos and even made some friends.
The last week of July was my first week of high school and honestly, I was scared. I spent time with my other brother, who is a senior, and his friends instead of the other freshman ause they were all rude and I hated them. I met another boy, sadly, but he was funny and I thought he liked me too.
My birthday happened on the 2nd and I ditched school for the One Direction concert in Las Vegas. When I returned, I tried out for the high school cheer squad and made JV. I made some friends because of cheer and got to see some of my friends at the K-8 from last year. It turned out that I was starting to like high school, maybe.
September 13th, also Niall's Birthday, was the second year anniversary for me and my best friend becoming best friends. That was also the month she announced that she was moving of of state and my life was starting to fall apart. I only had one best friend, what was I going to do at the end of the semester? My therapist said I had became more depressed because of it, too.
The entire fall break, I spent in my house crying and what not. When we returned to school, it was homecoming week and EVERYBODY told me that the guy I liked was going to ask me, but I was in the same class when he asked one of my cheer friends out in front of me. It broke me into a million pieces and I rushed to the bathroom to bawl my eyes out. I was literally so done with living once again. Don't even say I was overreacting, don't.
I don't remember much of November, except that I kept my distance from everybody until my best friend told me that I should spend time with her before she leaves. I never wanted her to leave; I thought that if I didn't spend time with her, it meant that she had to stay. My oldest brother came home from overseas for thanksgiving the following week and I had never been any happier than I had then, except for the concert (which was my birthday present from my him). He even came to one of my football games when I cheered.
Finals week approached on the first week of december, last week of the semester. This was the first time I had passed any tests with B's and I had the biggest smile on my face when my mother read my report card on it. Then winter break came. I literally spent most of my time on tumblr and movellas and twitter during the break before Christmas. For Christmas, I received; This Is Us: Extended Fan Edition, Our Moment, head phones, realign gummi bears from Germany (literally bc my brother went there overseas), cowgirl boots, socks with my name stitched on them, and a 1D 2014 calendar. And now, I'm writing this.
My year had its up's and it's down's, but not matter what, I stayed alive. I didn't kill myself, I made a promise to my bqrothers that I wouldn't be weak, just for them. And I've kept that promise through all the bullying, the lies, the tears, everything. And I'm glad I could sit on my computer and share my year with you guys. Thank you for a wonderful year, and a wonder time on movellas.
2014 or bust!
Get ready for a banner year of 2014!