Ryan and I basically hung out for the rest of the day and then he head home around five.I decided to do my homework,once I finished I made myself something to eat and sat down watching TV.I eventually got ready for bed and watched TV for a bit longer since it was still pretty early.Once I got tired of watching TV I head into my room and lay down in my bed.I eventually got comfy and drifted to sleep.
I woke up in the morning and got ready for school.I ate some cereal and when I was about to leave I remembered that Ryan said he'd come pick me up at my house so I just sat down on the sofa waiting for him to come.I soon heard a knock on the door and I eagerly got up to answer it.I saw Ryan standing there smiling. "Ready to go?"
"Yeah." I smile and then we both step outside,I close the door and lock it behind me then we head off for school.
Of course when we got there Ryan wanted to walk me to class again and I knew he wouldn't take no for an answer so I accepted.Before he left he gave me a hug and then I walked into class.The day went on and by the time I got to 3rd period I noticed a couple of people staring at me with anger in their eyes.I wasn't so sure what they were bothered about,I never even talked to any of them.When I was walking to 4th I guess I wasn't really paying any attention and I ended up bumping into something.I fell and I saw a binder drop to the floor,it wasn't mine so who's was it?I look up to meet someone's eyes and they were familiar to me.Angie was right in front of me,I must've bumped into her.We both remained silent looking at each other.I came to my senses and picked up her binder handing it to her. "Sorry I uh,wasn't looking." She remained silent and continued to stare at me.I had to admit this was making me feel a bit uncomfortable so I decided to try making everything less awkward.I picked myself up and then helped her up. "So what class do you have?"
"Oh well you should probably go,I'm sure you don't want to be late."
"Yeah I should...umm thanks for my binder."
"Yeah umm....it's no problem."
Awkward...extremely awkward!She walks off and I walk into class still feeling uncomfortable.As I walk in I am surprised to see Ryan already at his desk,I'm usually here first but then again I did have that incident with Angie.I took my seat and waited for class to start.Obviously we weren't really going to do anything for class since other groups still had to present their projects so I didn't bother taking out my supplies for class.Only two groups presented and we still had four more groups to go,English was going to be pretty chill for the next two days.The bell rang and I got up from my desk then head over to Ryan.I saw Derek looking at me,not so much with anger but more like a look of annoyance.Ryan looks to me and smiles then gives me a hug.
"Are we going?"
"Actually I'm gonna hang out with my friends today,I kind of promised...sorry."
"It's cool I'll just do some homework,I don't mind."
"Unless you wanna hang out with us?" Hmm big group of people or alone,what to do what to do? "That's okay I don't wanna be a burden on you guys."
"You won't be though."
"It's okay,I'll be fine.I'm sure I can survive without you for one day." I say the last part sarcastically.
"Haha,okay you'll see me in 6th so don't worry." He winks and I just playfully roll my eyes.I walk out of class and head to my tree.I take a seat by the trunk and start working on some homework.
"Hey Ryan what's with you and (YN)?"
"We're just friends,I thought we established this already."
"Yeah but I mean weren't you two not talking to each other?"
"How did you know?"
"It was pretty obvious,you two go from talking to each other everyday and hanging out to not even acknowledging each other."
"Well yeah I mean we had a minor fight but it's done now.People forgive and forget right?You can't hold a grudge against someone,that's not good."
"Okay but what did you two fight about?"
I glance at Derek but he doesn't notice then I turn my attention back to Jordan. "I just kind of felt like she was being a bad friend and I overacted but it's fine now."
"Well what did she do?"
"Well nothing too serious,but it was enough to get me pretty upset."
"What was it?"
"I don't want to talk about it,sorry man."
"Alright that's cool."
Jordan turns his attention to the other guys and I just look to Derek.He notices me and side smiles.
"Well you seemed kind of bored."
"I am,nothing interesting to talk about."
"I'm sure there's something."
"Yeah,you and (YN)."
"I just told Jordan we're just frie-,"
"I don't care about that but how?"
"How did you two makeup?I mean you were on a non-speaking basis pretty much ignoring each other."
"And let's not forget who's fault that was." He looks at me and raises an eyebrow,I begin to regret what I said but I remain silent and head strong.
"Look I know I had something to do with it but I mean you have to think about it...she didn't have to kiss me back and she could've pushed me off if she wanted."
"It doesn't matter now,I forgave her and we're friends again."
"What about me?"
"What about you?"
"Well did you forgive me?"
"Of course I did." He looks to me with a blank expression and then just starts talking to the other guys.Lunch eventually ends and I head to class.
At the end of 6th I was pretty relieved to just go home and relax for a bit.I waited for Ryan and then we both left the school campus together.While we were walking I noticed Michelle's car.
"Hey isn't that your mom's car?"
"Oh yeah,wait here?"
He head off and I stood waiting for him,it looked like he talked to her for a bit and then head back.
"So my mom wants to know if you'd like a ride?"
"I don't want to inconvenience you two."
"(YN),just accept the offer haha,she won't take no for answer."
"Haha okay then."
We walked over to the car and I said,hi to Michelle.Ryan opened the door for me allowing me to enter the vehicle then he got in the passenger's seat.We began to drive off and we soon arrived in front of my house.Michelle looked back to me and smiled. "Are you gonna be okay alone?"
"Uh,yeah I'm fine."
"Are you sure?I'll feel terrible knowing I left you home alone."
"Do you have a lot of homework?"
"Well not really,I did most of it already."
"Would you mind coming with me and Ryan?"
"Oh to our house,I just think I'd have an unclear conscience leaving you.Besides,I'm sure you'll get pretty bored all alone." She was right,once I finished my homework I would have nothing to do and I'd be bored.I have been to their house before so maybe it's not a bad idea to go over for a day.
"Would you mind?"
"Of course not!I adore you (YN),I'll just let your mother know you're going to be with us."
"Okay...thank you." I smile sweetly and then sit patiently awaiting for her to call my mother.Once she did they made some small talk over the phone and then when they finished Michelle told me my mom said it was fine with her but just to not be home too late.We drove off to Ryan's house and while we were driving Ryan would constantly look back making goofy faces at me and I'd giggle softly.When we arrived at their house Ryan stepped out and as I was about to open the car door he opened it for me.I thanked him and then we entered the house. "I haven't been here in a while."
"My house has been missing you."
"Haha your house?"
"Yes,it enjoys your company and you give off a warming presence."
"Haha okay,I missed your house too."
Michelle walked in after us and then she looked to me and Ryan. "Okay Ryan just because your friend is over don't think you can blow off your homework,why don't you get to work on that right now so you have more time to spend with (YN) once you're done and you won't have to worry about it later."
"But she'll get bored waiting."
"You two can work together."
"Fine." And with that Ryan head upstairs and told me to follow him.We went into his room and then he threw his backpack on the floor.I placed mine down in a corner and stood while he was sitting on his bed. "What do you know,my room misses you too."
"Haha,I'm just missed everywhere in your house."
"It's true I missed you,my mom missed you,my house,my room,and now I think my bed is starting to miss you."
He smiles and scoots over,he then pats the empty space on his bed beside him.I smile and take the empty seat. "Shouldn't you be working on homework?"
"Nah,I'll be fine.I'd rather spend time with you."
"What if you get in trouble?"
"Please,I'm a big boy I can handle myself haha."
"I just don't want your mom getting mad at you because of me."
"Who cares,it's not like she'd blame you.My mom absolutely loves you!"
"Haha my mom likes you a lot too."
"It's just I've never really spoken to her very much.It's strange to hear she likes me when I feel like she doesn't even know me."
"Well,what's not to like you're sweet,funny,polite,smart,and cute."
Wait what did I say?
"What?",I say in a nervous tone.
"I thought I heard you say I was...cute."
"Well I was just saying what she told me,you know like feedback."
"Oh,haha that makes sense." That was a relief he totally bought it! "So that's what your mom thinks about me but what do you...think about me?"
Oh no,just don't embarrass yourself. "I uh,think pretty much the same things."
"So you think I'm sweet?"
I look down shyly then look back up to find him smiling at me sweetly. "Aww that's sweet,thanks (YN),you're sweet,funny,and cute too."
We both sit looking at each other for awhile smiling and I begin to feel nervous.I think it'd be best to change the subject now. "So uh,I think we should do our homework now."
"Oh yeah homework,the worst creation ever known to man."
"Haha,well lets seriously get to work so we get it over and done with."
We both begin on our homework and Michelle came up to check on us. "How's everybody doing?"
"We're fine mom,it's just the two of us."
"Did I interrupt anything?"
"No,just working on our homework."
"Alright if you guys need anything just let me know.",and with that she left the room closing the door behind her.
Ryan and I continued to work on our homework,I finished first since I didn't have very much to do.I decided to help Ryan with some of his homework so he'd finish faster.Pretty soon he finished and then we began to start talking. "So (YN),I don't really know that much about you really?"
"And I don't know much about you."
"We should take the opportunity right now and get to know each other!"
"You and me,I mean besides the fact that I know you're a girl and bad with your social skills,I don't really know you at all.And you don't know me all that well either."
"Okay I get that but how would we get to know each other exactly?"
"We could...Ask each other questions!"
"Yeah and we answer honestly,of course personal things don't have to be shared."
Well,this didn't seem like such a bad idea,and it wouldn't bring any harm;he just said we don't have to talk about personal things so I think I'll just go along with it. "Okay,you ask first."
"What's your favorite color?"
"(Your favorite color)."
"Ohh,nice.It suits you."
"Haha umm thank you?"
"What?I meant it as a compliment."
"Sure you did."
"I did honest!"
"Haha okay,what about you?"
"It just seems like a cool color,plus it reminds me of a firetruck!"
"Yeah haha because they're red!I remember as a kid I went on a field trip with my class and I got to try on a fireman's uniform and sit in the truck with them.It was pretty cool and it made me grow up liking firetrucks,I mean it was a phase and I'm over it now but I have to admit I had a firetruck obsession probably until I was maybe like eleven or twelve."
"Yeah I used to drive my mom crazy,I would make loud siren noises and I'd ask her to play fireman with me.She'd of course be the damsel in distress and I'd be her savior haha.In the end,she always gave me a big hug and kiss,then she'd call me her little hero."
"Aww that's so cute!"
I look to him and see his face turn a light shade of pink,he looks down for a bit then back up with a smile. "Haha it's embarrassing." He smiles sweetly and I look down shyly. "What about you?"
"What about me?"
"Any childhood memories with your mom?"
"Oh come on I'm pretty sure you have something?"
"Well when I was little,my parents would take me to the park on weekends.There would usually be an ice cream truck and my dad would take me to it.He'd ask me what ice cream I wanted and I'd usually get a sponge bob Popsicle.He'd always get my mom a single scoop of strawberry flavored ice cream and he'd get chocolate.We'd usually eat our ice cream and walk around the park,when I finished I would play at the playground and sometimes I'd watch my parents sitting together on a bench.They were always smiling,laughing,and talking.When I saw them kiss I'd eww like any typical kid would and sometimes make a nasty face.We were really happy back then."
"Seems like your parents were really in love.I wish I could say the for my parents."
"No you don't."
"Because when things seem perfect and well,and you just feel like nothing could possibly ruin your happiness...something does."
It's silent for a moment and as I'm looking down I'm fighting all the memories trying to work their way back into my mind. "(YN)," I look up.
"What happened to your dad?"
"He uh...left us."
"I know what it's like to lose your dad,it sucks and the effect it can have on you...sucks even more."
"Yeah...it does suck."
Sure I just admitted to Ryan that my dad left us but that's not even the half of it.He just can't understand,sure he lost his dad too but the way I lost my dad is nothing like the way his left him.His dad was a drunk and mine was a family man.His dad treated his mom like crap and mine treated my mom like a princess.His dad could care less about him and mine loved me with all his heart.It's better to have your dad leave when you know you didn't mean anything to him because there's no real connection and you don't have to fight back so many emotions.Having your dad leave you when you have so much history together and chemistry as a family,it hurts a lot more because then you begin to feel confused and lost wondering what went wrong.You begin to blame yourself and then think of possible solutions that could fix something that is forever broken.You don't want to let go or give up hope of what used to be because it's basically like quitting yourself.In the end your only frustrating yourself and making yourself suffer.You try to turn to different solutions but nothing seems to work,your only choice left is to shut it out...and that's what I did.Shutting it out means no peak of emotion but it also means no pain and suffering.I know it's selfish but I'd rather live my life with no emotion than living a life of remorse.