My Story

this is a place where you can follow my progress with my feelings and most of all my eating disorder.
Love Cecilie or Cece

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3. Chapter 3

16.12.13 00.11 am 

 

Tonight i got back to my school, me and my roomie Lykke was watching the documentary Stay strong tonight.

Right now i'm thinking about the stupid things that have been changing me, like my ex boyfriend the way he was around me. Then he cheated on me, it makes me think that i wasn't good enough. 
i just wish sometimes that  i wasnt the weird girl with an eating disorder, but of course it had to be me. At first when i got this disorder, i always thought that there were people around me that had harder life than me. 

19.22

Today, I've just had the worst day ever. 
First I had kitchen duty because I live at a boarding school. Then I was waiting for a letter from my best friend from my  last boarding school. But it didn't  come today and i was just sad. Then there were lunch as usual i didn't eat that much. then after lunch i was about to go up to my room and then some of the other dancers  and asked me what i thought of our dance team. I said " I guess its alright why?" then  they didnt know what to say and i just said. "Let me guess it's because people started talking about me in dance." then they said yes. I almost just cried right there but i had to get something and i didn't want them to see. after my last hour of kitchen duty  i had to attend my dance class and then when i was about to go up and change to my dancing clothes i saw the whole dance team including our teacher talking and i just sat down because she asked me to. then they were talking about  how we thought it was going on the team and after our talk i walked up to my room and broke into tears. I couldn't stop i was soo sad because i felt like i was the stupid girl there. because the others are so much better at dancing than me...  

* Sorry for not updating this weekend but i had a family come together i will make the next chapter about that because that was one of the worst weekends this school year.* 

Love Cecilie 

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