Breathe

Bradley is smoking hot. He's a man whore. Every girl wants to jump in his pants not to mention a few guys. But then, there's Shay. She hates everything about him, from his floppy hair to his Australian accent.
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Shay is a bookworm. She reads and reads and reads. If she's not reading she's dancing in her mother's studio.
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Somehow Bradley finds this ever so endearing and tries his very hardest to get her attention. But of course he'll never get it.

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12. 12

A/N

Is anyone still reading this? I always love your nice comments! Anyway, my little shit computer ISN'T FUCKING SAVING and it's PISSING ME OFF. okay let's try this again.

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Shay's POV

"Get out!" I stood off the couch. "I said get out!" I yelled when Josh didn't move to get off the couch.

"Shay, I'm not leaving again. I promise."

"You said that all the time when we were kids, and you know what always stayed the same? You always left! First day of Kindergarten, you left me with that kid who picked his nose. Through that rainstorm in 4th grade you went over to your friend's house even though you knew I was terrified. Freshman year of high school, when your friends called me fat, you just laughed with them. Graduation, you fell asleep during my Valedictorian speech!"

"Look, I know I haven't been the best brother, but you haven't been the best sister either."

"Really? Okay. When mom first started drinking, and you broke her favorite vase, I took the blame for it and she slapped me, so hard across the face that it left a mark. Prom, when you spiked the punch I convinced the principal not to expel you. When you broke your arm doing god knows what with your friends I drove you to the hospital and payed the bill without mom and dad knowing. Yeah I seem like a pretty horrible sister."

"You dated my best friend."

"You dated my best friend, and then my bully. And when I told you it bugged me, you had sex with her."

"Oh..."

"Yeah. So you can go back to your beautiful wife and kids."

"Who's the father of that baby?" He blurts. I pause. He stares. My whole body is tense as he waits for an answer.

"Why do you wanna know?"

"You don't even know do you?" He asks. A tear falls onto my cheek. "Wow. I can't believe you."

"Who are you to judge me?! You are the only disgrace in our family! And that messes with you doesn't it? That I haven't messed up too huh?"

"You haven't messed up? Oh really? When you're such a whore that you don't know who the father of your kid is!"

"A whore?! Oh no no no. I am no whore! You sir, are in for quite a fucking surprise." I had been cursing a lot lately when just last week I had called Brad a 'twerp' as I recall. "April 2nd, 2012. I was leaving Nicole's apartment," I stopped to look at him as he sighed, "Anyway, I found a short cut through this old abandoned parking lot, and I thought, How smart of me! It's easier to go through and it's safe! Oh yeah, so safe. So I'm walking and I'm walking and I see this man, he's about 23 I'd say. And I'm in my short shorts, is that what turned him on to me? Or was it my plaid button down shirt that showed quite a bit of cleavage? Anyway he's walking over to me, joint in hand and he looks alright, no missing teeth charming smile, a little scruffy..."

"You fucked him in a parking lot?"

"Ha! If that's all you want to believe then sure, we can stop the story there and say I fucked him in the parking lot! Because that's so much easier to believe than to think for one second that I didn't have a choice." I swallowed. "Weak. That's what you think I am don't you? Weak and easy and slutty, is that what you think I am?! You think I fuck every once of my pain away just like you did to Taylor Corella 4 years ago?! Well guess what brother? We're not 16 anymore! Welcome to fucking real life! Did you see my beautiful little accident sitting in that room?! My 1 year and 11 month old baby boy sitting in there and not think, Wow, he looks really happy?! Now you may have chosen to have your kids, or maybe they were accidents too, but one thing is different, and that thing, is not that I got raped in a parking lot, no Sir, I won't believe for a second that that monster is the difference between us. The difference is, I'm so much stronger than you are, than you will ever be! Because when times got hard, I didn't run away, didn't once think about it, because my mother needed me and I know she wasn't great but she was family and I swear that I will stay with my family until the day I die." 

"What and I'm not family?"

"You walked away from this family TWO FUCKING YEARS AGO!"

"Whoa. Whoa, What's all this yelling about?" My dad came out of my mother's bedroom with puffy red eyes, he'd been crying. "Josh?"

"Dad?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I heard... about mom."

"would it have hurt you to come around before she died?" His words cut deep, but not into me, into Josh. "What are you doing stressing my daughter out when her mother just died?"

"What are you doing sleeping when she's an emotional wreck?"

"Guys, stop," I tried to yell but my throat was burning. "Jake's in the other room, and so is Brad.Josh you need to go home, and so do you dad. Brad's here to look after Jake."

"You trust him?" Josh scoffed.

"Actually I do. Besides you don't have a say in it do you?" he backed off. "Now go home."

Brad's POV

I seriously contemplated interrupting that fight, but it wasn't my fight. So I made sure that Jake slept through it, and locked us in a quiet room where the sounds were muffled. Jake only stirred a bit in his sleep, opening one eye and putting his tiny thumb in his mouth, then falling into a deep sleep again. I waited and waited,until the front door finally slammed to venture out into the Living room. 

"Hey." I smiled holding the sleeping boy in my arms. "Are you okay?" She shook her head and I went to set the small child into his bed, crib thingy. i walked back into the living room and wrapped my arms around her shoulders. 

"What should I do?!" She sobbed. "My mother's dead!"

"I know and it sucks and it's gonna suck for a really long time, but you're gonna have to hang in there."

"How do you know?"

"Because my mom's dead too."

"And now your dad's getting married again?"

"I know she's trying, my soon to be step mom, but she can't replace her. She can't fit that exact hole in my heart that was taken away when my mother died."

"You have a hole in your heart?" She searched my eyes.

"I mean... That was really cheesy. I didn't mean to say it like that..." She put her finger up to stop me.

"It's not cheesy to be honest." I couldn't look away from her emerald green eyes. "What happened to her? I mean if you don't wanna tell me that's..."

"She died when I was 15. She was having a baby and every one was so excited. You could imagine how much more excited we were when we found out it was twins. And then one day the doctor told her..." I took a deep breath. "That the babies weren't going to survive, and it was too early in the pregnancy to induce labor. So she went the full term and gave birth to two stillborn children. And she went a little insane after that, she acted like it never happened and that she was still pregnant. But she kept getting better, her memory slowly coming back until, September 21, 2008, she drowned herself in a bath tub."

"Brad... That's horrible." She gasped. She didn't say sorry, to which I was relieved. She hugged me closer as if I were the one crying. But now that I think of it maybe I was. I stroked her hair feeling her tears soak into my t-shirt. 

"Are you hungry? I could... make you some mac and cheese..." I laughed at my lack of skills in the kitchen. 

"That'd be nice." She hiccuped. A comfortable silence settled between us as I furrowed my brows reading the directions on the mac and cheese box. "Look, I'm sorry, for calling the police last night."

"It's fine, really, I deserved it. Or we deserved it."

"How does it feel?" 

"What?" I studied her face and her eyes dropped from my jaw. "Oh. It's just a little bruised. You should have seen him..." I grimaced as the words left my mouth, she notices.

"I'm not saying that you had any right, but neither did he. You could have backed off."

"He acts like he cares about you, but I can tell, this dude is bluffing."

"So am I, with him I mean."

"He talks to Jake like he's gum on the bottom of his shoe!"

"What?"

"Today, when you were crying, before Josh came in, Jake was asking who his father was and all this stuff. And I told him some people are better off without one, and he told me that Peter tells him he ruined your life." I glanced at her.

"He told you this?" 

"Yeah." We stayed silent again as I finished making the mac and cheese. 

"How can you tell he doesn't care about me? I mean even before you found out about Jake." 

"Because when he talks about you, it's like you're his property. He doesn't say a thing about your beautiful eyes, the way they shine, even in complete darkness, and the way your nose crinkles when you laugh. Your body like a fucking goddess, and your hair, like a lion's mane." She swatted my arm at this. "He never said how heart breaking it is to see you cry, or how funny you look when you get mad. I just feel like if he loved you he'd...." I looked into her begging eyes, "He'd feel like I do." She gasped. "How's your dinner?" I added quickly.

"Do you..." Her eyes flashed with confusion, then anger, then...hope. "It's good." She smiled looking anywhere but at me.

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