If you only knew me...

Justin: "why does my dad hate me? Why do some kids pick on me at school? Why do they have to judge me for every little thing? Only if they knew me...."


3. Your dead to me dad..

Chapter 3:

Jeremy: why are you late. Again justin?
Justin: umm im sorry i run slow?..
Jeremy: im getting tired of your fucking sorrys. Their bullshit. 
Justin: well im sorry ok?! Wtf do you want?!
-jeremy slaps justin across the face. Justin fell to the floor. -
Jeremy: dont fucking cuss at me! Tbh we shouldve put you into adoption since you were born! I knew you were just gunna be trouble since the day you were born!
That hit me. I knew thats how he felt about me. I knew i didnt ment shit to him. I fucking hated him so much. Hes dead to me now. He always puts me down & never supports me. Fuck you dad. Your dead to me. 
Justin: really? Thats really wat you think?
Jeremy: no shit you idiot. 
Justin: fine. Then leave me alone. 
Justin runs up to his room & locks the door. He just sat on his bed with his head down. Crying. He couldnt take all this anymore. He went to the restroom, and got his blade out. He went back to his room. He just starred at his skin. His perfectly nice skin. He started crying even harder. All those words his dad told him. He got the blade, and made the first cut. It made him feel good. He made the second, then the third, then the forth, then the five cut. He saw his blood dripping on the floor. He finnaly made the tenth cut, and stopped. He saw his arm. All bloody & cutted up. 
I dont know how im still here. I dont know why im on this planet. I just wish that everytime i go to bed, i never wake up. I just wish i could sleep forever. That would be nice. Not being able to feel all this pain and hurt that i feel everyday of my life. I heard the front door close. I look out my window and see my dad driving off. Probably to the store. Im all alone. I saw the blood on the floor. I get some towels and clean it off the floor. I saw my arm and washed it off. Fuck my arm burned like a bitch. I heard someone pulling up the drive way. It was my mom. I open my room and run downstairs. 
Justin hears pattie knocking on the door. He opens the door. 
Justin: MOOOMMM!!! I missed you!!!!
-goes and gives his mom a big hug-
Pattie: awww justin i missed you too. 
Justin: sooo why are you home so early?
Pattie: i was let out early son. 
-pattie sees justin arm-
Pattie: justin...
Justin: yea?
Pattie: why did u selfharmed?...
Justin: * looks down and starts crying*
Pattie: justin why did you cut? Talk to me. 
Justin: my dad. 
Pattie: your father? Wat did he do now?
Justin: *tells her the whole story*
Pattie: *starts crying* thats not righr. Wat he told you. You are always loved by me justin. I love you so much. Your my son so im always gunna be there for you.
Justin:thank you mom. I love you too. 
Pattie went to the kitchen and prepared the dinner. Justin went upstairs to do his homework. Then jeremy pulls up the drive way and enters the house. He sees pattie making dinner in the kitchen. He goes in. 
Jeremy: hey honey *kisses her*
Pattie: *refuses the kiss*
Jeremy. *confuse look* wats wrong?
Pattie: how can you say that about our son?! 
Jeremy: because he deserves to know the fucking truth! Hes a little brat! That everything is anout him when its not. Hes a fucking idiot. 
Pattie: *slaps jeremy* dont you dare say that about my son! I love him so much and he doesnt deserve all the shit you give him. You deserve to rot in hell you stupid-
Jeremy cuts her off and socks her in the face. Justin heard something downstairs. He wemt running down stairs to see his mom on the floor bleeding from the mouth, crying. Justin looks at jeremy with a angry look. 
Jeremy walks over to justin & tries to slap him but justin grabs his hand and pushes him to the ground. Justin runs over to his mom and lifts her up. He puts her on the couch and sees his dad coming towards him. 
Justin: dont get close to us. 
Jeremy: why not? Shes my wife. 
Justin:well shes my mom. Shes more related to me than she ever will be with you. 
Jeremy gets mad and leaves the house. Justin goes and brings a wet towel to her. 
Pattie: justin you shouldve not done that. 
Justin: mom, he socked you. Of course i was gunna go in and protect you. Your my mom. 
Pattie: thank you son. Imma go rest up now. Goodnight justin. 
Justin: goodnight mom. 
Pattie goes upstairs to her room. It was really late now. It was almost midnight. Justin goes upstairs. Ready to go to bed. 
Fuck. What a crazy night. I cant believe my dad actually hit my mom in the face. I fucking hate him so much now. He lost all respect for me. I wish he never comes back home. Now i have to get ready for bed. Just another horrible day awaits for me tomorrow. I wish i could sleep for. Just never wake up and you know. Just sleep with no pain and no hurt in me. I just dont wanna be here anymore....

( Im sorry this chapters kinda short cx but dont worry i have lots if ideas coming up for this book. Trust me, you will be begging for more :3 yup, just stay toon. For more chapters. Love you all<3) 

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