Recovery

Four years ago, at seventeen years old, Katrina Burke was madly in love. Until her relationship with eighteen year old Justin Bieber became abusive. Not even a year later, at eighteen years old, Katrina ran. At first she'd thought it was a good idea, but when she found out she was pregnant with Justin's child, her life became even more troubled and twisted. Now, at twenty-one, Katrina's life is good. She has a great job, a nice place to stay, and a beautiful three year old daughter named Camryn. Everything is perfect until a certain someone comes into her life again, ready to show her how much he's changed.
© 2013 by beliebervision & SoccerBieber18. All Rights Reserved.

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22. Chapter 21

We stayed like that for awhile. Him holding me in his strong protective arms as I cried like there's was no tomorrow. I cried because I was scared about this new baby. I cried because I was so happy I had him back...that I had my heart back. But I also cried because I was angry, angry that he left us for such selfish reasons. 

I hated that he made it seem like he was trying to have a better life and make ours better too but I doubt he was fixing anything. I hated the way he left, just after we made love he decided he wanted to leave. I hated that he put me through all this trouble just to come back so quickly. 

"Get off me." I muttered to him as anger took over. I wiped all my tears and roughly got out of his arms. Justin furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. I rolled my eyes then stood up so I was facing him. 

"What makes you think it's ok to leave like that? Without an explanation for your child and just after you had sex with me?" I blurted with my arms crossed. He sighed then ran his fingers through his hair. 

"Kat everything was too much. I just needed a healthy break from all the stress." He sighed. 

"You needed a break? Huh, I needed a break too Justin. Shit I still need a break." I laughed bitterly. "Last time I checked, you weren't the one who had to carry and raise a child all by yourself. You didn't have to worry about your ex finding you and hurting you again. You didn't have to have nightmares about being beaten to death." I gritted through my teeth, knowing I was pushing his buttons. 

"How many fucking times do I have to apologize to you Katrina! I understand I was wrong I'm trying to fix everything so I can be the person you want our kids to look up to." He exclaimed. 

"Oh so you couldn't do that and still live with us? You had to run away from your problems Justin. Is that what you're always going to do run when things get hard? When we fight?" I yelled back. 

"Did you really want to see me after I had my fix? Did you want Camryn to hear the countless arguments between us because of my problems? I did what I thought was best for everyone's well being Kat." He spat standing up and walking a little closer to me with very dark hateful eyes.

"Did you think about our feelings? Did you think about how Camryn would feel with the only man she's been close to walk away? How I would break the news to her?" I spat back with a death glare on him. "What about my feelings? Did you think I'd just forget about you or ignore the love and heartbreak I felt?" I continued while my voice cracked a little bit. 

"In every scenario something would have went wrong Kat. Either Camryn would grow up in a broken home with two unhappy parents or have a nice up bringing without even remembering her druggy abusive father. Which sounds better?" He said back stepping close towards me every time but surprisingly I wasn't fazed at all by him.  "And did you really think it was easy to leave you? You weren't the only one in love here. You weren't the only one who spent nights miserably thinking constantly about what we had. But I couldn't just give you a horrible life stuck with me." 

Tears brimmed in my eyes. I wanted to feel happy and loved that he thought about me constantly but I just couldn't, not right now. I looked away from his intense gaze and fixed mine on the window where the sun was beautifully setting. 

"Then why are you here? Why did you come back?" I whispered tired of yelling and not being able to trust my voice. Even though a tear slipped my eye. 

Justin roughly grabbed my cheeks with his hands forcing me to look in his dark cold eyes. The last time he did this he hit me but just couldn't tell why I wasn't scared right now. 

"I can't repeat the past. I can't leave you alone again pregnant and hating me. I figured out this is my second chance to be the father and boyfriend I should be. I need to prove to them, you, and me that I'm able to do this." He breathed out. 

I don't know if it's the hormones or my love for him. But just in a split second I wasn't as mad anymore. I was a little happier and grateful that he's trying for everyone. 

I nodded before resting my forehead on his and closing my eyes. We both took deep breaths trying to cool down. I felt tears fall down on my nose and cheeks but they weren't from me. I fluttered my eyes opened to see his light brown eyes watery and red with tears coming out the corners. I lifted my hands up to his cheeks caressing them and rubbing all the tears the fell. 

"I'm trying ok?" He croaked followed by a small sob. "I really am." He whispered. 

"I know." I whispered while nodding my head. 

 

Even though this argument left us more confused then ever, I felt weight off my shoulders now that I let every grudge against him finally out. It was like we needed this argument to happen to have some closer and forget about the past. 

Once Justin had stop crying he smiled at me and loosens his grip on my cheeks to a more comfortable one. I couldn't help but smiled back. I moved my hands down to his biceps and started to rub up and down them loving the muscular feel to them.

"I'm really sorry for all that shit I put you through Kat. I'm a dick and if I were you I would punch me in the face right now. But I can't change what I have done. If this is going to work you have to except I've changed." He told with the most sincere look I've ever seen him give.

"I know and I'm sorry for blowing up on you like that." I sighed looking down feeling a little guilty. But Justin was quick to kiss my forehead. "But did you honestly think I'd let you come back that easily?" I joked trying to lighten the mood a bit. He rolled his eyes and chuckled. 

After our little giggles and chuckles died down Justin had his hands still on my cheeks and he caressed them softly. He was looking deep into my eyes with a little smile on his face which I returned. He was deep in thought for a couple of seconds before he flicked his eyes to my lips then back up to my eyes. He did that while bringing his head closer to mine. Our heads were so close his nose nudged mine a little before just felt his lips brush mine. Getting a little impatient I didn't let his lips move back. I caught them in mine before he could pull them away.  

He chuckled at my eagerness before kissing me back gently with a stupid smile on his face. 

"I love you." He mumbled against my lips after pulling away from our kiss.

"I love you too." I whispered back before sneaking a peck on his lips.  

 

Right at that moment I knew that I couldn't live without Justin Drew Bieber.

Him and our family meant the world to me. Without them here I wouldn't know what to do with myself but that makes me even more grateful. With Justin here I'm sure that this baby will be healthy and happy because it has a stable family.

So the baby stress isn't stress anymore. Camryn probably would be ecstatic that she has a younger sibling on the way and that Justin was back, and I can't even lie I was ecstatic too. 

And, looking back at it now, I'm surprised that I didn't want to recover. But I'm glad we did.

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