Draco Malfoy and the Rejected Handshake

A scrapbook of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone from Draco Malfoy's point if view. Made for laughs, enjoy!

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3. Letter...

Dearest Popsicle, (I made a new nickname for you father, makes you sound FAR more interesting don't you think?)

My first week at Hogwarts is coming to an end and I must say, it is going quite as planned.

As you expected, I am the most popular boy in school - even more popular than that "Chosen One" Harry Potter who is far beneath my friendship. You know, he actually asked to be my friend but (get this Popsicle)... I REFUSED THE CHOSEN ONE'S HANDSHAKE! And then I said to myself, Father will hear about this. And now you have.

For the record, Potter is now stuck with a blood traitor and mud blood who call themselves friends. Figures.

However I, your darling Draco have exceeded even your high hopes! Not only am I a wonderful favourite with the ladies, I also have the finest boys in Slytherin as my henchmen. Now doesn't that make you proud? 

And now to the serious business of taking the Dark Lord into Hogwarts. Every teacher likes me and would surely risk their lives for me. I will have no trouble defeating Dumbledore now I have my posse of very capable adult minions. 

I promise you that I will write soon and await your reply most eagerly daddy,

Your most absolute favourite son,

Draco Matilda Malfoy 

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