Draco Malfoy and the Rejected Handshake

A scrapbook of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone from Draco Malfoy's point if view. Made for laughs, enjoy!

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15. Draco's Unicorntastic nicknames for everyone in Hogwarts

My own fabulous nicknames:

Captain Awesome. - My own invention :)

Detective Inspector Sherlock Draco Matilda Malfoy Poirot Cleaseau Holmes. - My stage name. Because you're obviously so interested, my catch phrase will be revealed later in this book. If you're not interested then get out of this movella. Now. I command you!!! NOW!

Oh great high and mighty hear your name and fall to the floor screaming jellyfish of doom Majesty.  - I think I need something longer.. Oh, I know! 

Oh great high and mighty hear your name and fall to the floor screaming jellyfish of doom riding unicorns from the flowered fields of Ob Majesty - Not awesome enough... Hmmm

Oh great high and low and mighty and on some occasions weak hear your name and fall to the floor screaming jellyfish of doom riding unicorns from the flowered fields of Ob but also sometimes jump up and down and then turn into a baby seal with an ickle cute wickle party hat with pink fairies on it Majesty - Perfect. *Fist punch to all my loyal unicorn henchpeople*

Malfoy - Potter's nickname for me. I mean COME ON Potter. Try and be a little more inventive. Though knowing your amount of brain cells, that probably took you a week to think up. Well DONE Potter. Clever.

 

My nicknames for Pansy Parkinson:

MybeautifulevenmorebeaurifulthanaunicornPansyWansyWooWooWoooooo - She'll love it! Well obviously. She loves everything I do. Just call me awesome. Because I am. (CATCHPHRASE ALERT!!!!!)

 

My nicknames for Voldemort -

He who must not be named

The dark Lord

The Pizza

The Dark Pizza

 

My nicknames for Potter -

Snotter Potter

Snotty Potty

Potter - This is my favourite. Well obviously, it's SO inventive. 

 

My nicknames for Granger -

Mangy Granger

Granger

Mudblood - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! RAOUBL!!!! (Which btw, for all you BC readers, means Rolling Around On Unicorn's Back Laughing. Jealous yet? ;D)

 

My nicknames for Weasley -

Weasley

Ronald Weasley

Poo head - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! OH MY FLUFFY PINK UNICORNS!! INSULT OF THE MILLENNIUM!! FORGET THAT - BEST INSULT EVER!!!! 

 

My nicknames for Crabbe and Goyle -

Stupids

Henchman 1

Henchman 2

Sheep - baaaaaaaaaaaaaa! They follow my lead like, perfectly <3

Slave 1

Slave 2

 

My nicknames for Potter's parents -

Dead

 

My nicknames for Father -

Popsicle

Popsiclepie

Daddykins

Vater - but I say it Farter :P

 

My nicknames for Snape -

Shnabe babe - Oh yeah, he's such a babe when you get to know him!

Severus Ape - Well...he does have a lot of hair... ;-)

Snape - Yet another  of my wonderfully inventive nicknames...

 

 My nickname for Professor Sprout (she may not be a main teacher, but she has a fabulously nickname-able name!)

Brussel Sprout - LOL, get it?

 

 

 

 

 

 

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