Something To Live For

"Tell me what I have to do to make you mine."

I'm tired of being sad, depressed and ruined. I want to be able to say, Yeah I lived. not Yeah I was alive once.

"Just give me something to live for."


8. 8.

I rush into my house and take my wet shoes off as I enter. I run up to my room and lay down on my bed as I just cry. That's all I have planned to do and all I will do. I'm not even upset with Harry anymore, to be honest I don't remember why I was mad at him in the first place. I was just mad at myself for overreacting and being a complete fucking bitch.


He probably hates me. He's probably judging me right now, he already said I was a bitch so why not believe it? I know I am anyways. In all honesty I'm growing tired of being a nasty bitch to people. I don't find it fun to have everyone mad at me and scared of me and to have everyone judge me its completely exhausting.


The one person that actually tried to put up with me was Harry and I already fucked that up.


I want to change. I want to start over. I want something to live for.






2 days later* Monday Morning*****



"Mum? How do I look?" I said as I walked downstairs with my new outfit I got yesterday. I had on light wash skinny jeans and a baby blue patterned shirt and baby blue vans instead of my usual black attire. My hair was wavy and I also dyed it back to my natural dirty blonde color. I put on less make up which is light eyeliner, mascara, and natural brown eye shadow. I just felt prettier. I liked my new change.


This look made me feel happier about myself. I felt cleaner and pretty and not as dark and it just felt... me.


"Honey, you look beautiful! You look like you're 14 again!" she said as it sounded like she was about to cry. She took me into a hug and set my breakfast on the table. Yes, I eat breakfast now. I've also been trying to stop being so rude to people, although the only person I've spoken to since my decision was my mother, I've been doing great. Especially because of our relationship history. I feel completely horrible for the way I've been treating her and I hate it. If there was anything I could do to annul it I would. I ate my scrambled eggs quickly and grabbed my bag. I said goodbye to my mum and left for school.




"Sorry I'm late!" I said as I saw Mr. Hastal looking at his papers.


"Just take a seat Annabe- Oh I'm sorry. Who are you miss?" he said and I chuckled. I must really look different.


"Its me. Annabelle. Just... different." I said and smiled a little as I took my usual seat.



... Next to Harry.










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