FML

This is my story. So, this is basically like a diary I'm naming names because yolo and ya. I don't care if people that I know find this cause hey at least they will know MY side of the story. Don't judge someone by their cover.

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3. entry #3

UGH the pain screeches through me like a needle. My abdomen is on fire. It hurts so bad. My headaches have gotten a lot worse and I just want to scream into a pillow. Like wtf why do I have to go through this. My life is a screw up.

The bright side to this all is that my aunt bought me one direction tickets. Like I was on the verge of giving up because my mom is paying THOUSANDS of dollars for my meds and she's still paying off the hospital bill from my procedures. Then I told my aunt I would do ANYTHING if she would give me some money and one day I said the tickets are selling out I will do anything and she said

"Oh I was planning on getting you the tickets anyways" I was on the floor crying so hard as I am right now. Like I seriously couldn't be more grateful and I just feel like crying every time I mention the story. My life was hanging by a thread and that gave me an ounce more.

Other than that one hop of hope my life has been down the toilet that is stuck in a donkeys arse. Like I hate it. People aren't as much as making fun of me as calling out my symptoms from my meds. Like my cheeks are getting really chubby and people keep mentioning it. Like WHY DONT YOU SHUT THE F*** up and MIND YO OWN BIDNESS.

I am sorry that was a small rant but ugh. I just don't want to go to school every morning and feel like crying because it might be the last day I see my friends. Even my enemies I would want to say goodbye to. Like please give me the strength to pull through this cause I'm SO scared I am not.

Today we took a field trip to what high school we are going to and I'm not going to either of the options cause my mom wants me to go to a better school. Yet I want to go to this school my friend are going to not only cause they are there but it has a good photography program and that's what I want to be when I grow up. So we went and here I am planning my schedule and shit when I know I could very well not even make it to high school.

Like what did I do to GOD or who ever made me. I'm not a big believer in the whole god thing I guess cause I hate how people say you can't be gay when YES YOU CAN and how people say that rap music is a sin or sex is a sin or being gay is a sin like HELLO killing people is a sin NOT wanting to do something or someone because you love them/it. It's our life let us live it. Gosh.

I. Hate. My. Life.

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