Rachel feels as if she is not loved. She bounces from guy to guy hoping to find that feeling she once felt so long ago. She has nobody to talk to and nowhere to go. That is, until her parents send her off to live with her cousin.


3. Arrival

I woke up to somebody shaking me.

"Yoo-hoo, Rachel, are you awake yet. We are going to land. Wake up Rachel. C'mon, wake up." I knew it was Geoffrey.

"Yeah I'm awake." I shot up and rubbed my eyes. "We're really landing already?"

"Yep, you must have been really tired. You slept the whole way. Didn't you get any sleep last night?"

I thought back to last night. I didn't get any sleep, I was Up All Night with nightmares. They were mostly about moving in with Louis, but there were a few about Zayn. I imagined how he would look now, if we'd still be together, if we weren't, what happened to cause us to split, what would of happened if we ever got married.

"Not really." I mumbled. And then I felt the plane dip down. A few minutes later we were on the ground, "Finally, I need to get off of here, my legs are stiff."

Just as I said that, the seatbelt light went off and a flight attendant was opening the door.

I stood up and stretched as Geoffrey made his way off the plane. I followed behind him, and off the plane.

"It was really nice meeting you Rachel. I hope to see you again." He turned around after we left the tunnel and were in the main airport.

"You too," I smiled at him, "Well I should be going." I said as he just stood there smiling. "Bye." I waved awkwardly as I walked away.

I looked back as I stepped on the escalator and saw him still standing there smiling at me. Creepy.

I made my way to the front door. Then suddenly, it hit me, how was I getting to Louis's? I looked around to see if he was waiting for me. No luck. I tried to look outside to see if he was out there but I couldn't see much, it was snowing and it was dark already. I looked at the clock in the airport and saw that it was 7:00.

I decided to walk through the airport to see if I could find him. Maybe he was lost? I doubted that, but hey, you never know, this is Louis we're talking about now.

I walked around for about an hour before I gave up. I was looking for crowds of people, if he was in a public place like this, there would be people around him. I found nothing, no sign of him anywhere. I went back to the front doors and sighed before I pushed the heavy doors open and went outside.

The cold stung as it hit my warm cheeks. I took out the little piece of paper my mother gave me out of my pocket. It was folded so I unfolded it and read the scribbled letters on it. All it told me was his address. Nothing else.

I exhaled loudly as I shoved the note in my sweatshirt pocket and started walking down the street.

After about a mile, I took another sweater out of my bag and put it on. I put my hoods up and tried to push myself as far back in it as it would allow. 'Three more miles.' I told myself.

I tried to jog to warm myself up, but I was already too cold and my limbs were too numb. I just pushed myself to go as fast as I could. It wasn't very fast.

By the time I got to the address, it felt like my legs were going to snap off with each step I took.

I didn't even look up as I walked to the front door and knocked.

"Hello, Rachel? Is that you?"

The warm air was so inviting that I lifted my head and leaned forward.

"Rachel! It's so good to see you, it's been so long." Louis cheered.

"So long." I barely managed.

"Come in, come in." He made way for me and practically pulled me in the house.

He led me over to the couch and we sat down.

"I'll be right back, you look freezing. I'm getting you some blankets." And he was gone. But he was back in a minute or two.

He handed me about five blankets. I quickly set them beside me and he frowned. To make him feel better, I picked one up and loosely draped it around my shoulders. The corners of his mouth turned up a little bit.

"So, how's life been?" He asked sounding casual. Did he really just ask me that?

It's been horrible! I hate it! I don't want to be here! I hate you! I wanted to say, "Okay." is all that came out.

"You're still shivering, I'll go make you some hot cocoa. He got up and left. I wrapped the blanket tighter around me and laid down. I pulled my knees up to my chest and covered my head with the blanket. If I wasn't sleeping when Louis got back, I was going to pretend that I was.

I heard a two sets of heavy steps running down the stairs. Oh no. I froze.

"Louis! Is she here?" A husky voice yelled.

I moved a little to make it seem like the sound almost woke me up.

"Sh, she's on the couch. I think she's sleeping." another voice whispered. The voice sounded familiar? Probably not, they were whispering, it would be hard to tell who it was.

"Yeah she's here!" Louis called coming back into the room. "Oh, is she sleeping?" he dropped his voice to a whisper also.

"I think so," the husky one said, "I'll be upstairs." 
I heard his steps going up the stairs again and then they disappeared.

"I guess I better take her to her room." Louis sighed.

"Don't worry. I got it. You go put the cocoa away." the other one said quietly.

"You sure?," Louis asked, "her room is the first one on the right." Louis told him without waiting for an answer to the first question.

Louis's slow, padding footsteps went off to the kitchen.

I didn't hear anything for a second until I was suddenly being picked up. I could feel his muscular arms wrapped around me and I immediately rolled into his chest. I remembered that I was probably to stiff to be sleeping so I relaxed a little bit. The movement of me being carried up the steps, caused the blanket to move away from my face. It was a little hole for me to look out of. I looked at the boy's face who was carrying me and I became rigid again.

My stiffening caused him to look down at me. The blanket fell away from my face even more. I clenched my eyes shut and didn't dare to even breath. I heard him gasp quietly, and he almost came to a stop. He suddenly turned and I wondered where we were going.

I knew where we were when I was being lowered and I felt the soft cushion under me. I was in 'my' room. He carefully laid my head on the pillow an then it was quiet. I felt the dip of the bed beside me as he sat on it. I could feel the bed move as he slowly shifted his weight.

Suddenly, there was something very warm brushing against my cold cheek as it pulled the blanket away from my face.

I wanted to open my eyes and pull the blanket back, but that would ruin my charade. I was about to open my eyes but caught myself just as they fluttered. I felt his hand pull back and his weight shift away from me as he got off of the bed.

I waited for the sound of him leaving but I couldn't hear anything. I was about to open my eyes again when I heard the soft whisper. He whispered my name. He knew it was me. Why did he have to be here, why did it have to be the one person I wanted to see the least, could this day get any worse?

I could feel my eyes watering under my lids and a tear was about to escape when I heard the soft click of the closing door. He was gone.

I shot up and the tears came rushing out. I tried to quiet myself only causing me to be louder. I bit the blanket in a desperate attempt to shut my self up before anybody heard me. Too late. I heard the door opening, I closed my eyes and fell down on the bed.

"Rachel, I know you're awake." I was afraid it would be Zayn, it was Louis. I still refused to move, "I heard you crying, what's wrong?" he asked, not giving up.

"Nothing." I muttered, keeping my eyes closed.

"Then what's wrong?"

"I said nothing, just a nightmare," I lied, "can you please go now, I'm trying to sleep." that was a little rude.

He didn't say anything and I heard the door close, and I was alone again.

I got out of the bed and crossed the room over to the window. I lowered my self to the floor in front of it. I curled up into my usual ball that I always used to sleep in, and tried to let unconsciousness take over me. I remembered how cold I was though and started shivering again. I would never be able to sleep while I was this cold. Oh well, I didn't need to sleep tonight.

I turned towards the dark wall to keep my face out of the light. The light from the hallway was intruding under the crack in the door. 'Hello, I'm trying to sleep here!' I said mentally. I guess I wasn't really trying to sleep, was I? The light still bothered me though.

Suddenly, the bright light flooded my room. I flipped around to see what it was. There was somebody standing in the doorway, they were looking towards the bed. Panic flashed across their face when they saw that I wasn't there. But relief quickly replace that panic when they saw me lying on the floor. Their eyes widened when they saw that mine were open looking at them.

I watched as he hesitantly walked across the room towards me. He crouched down and then sat a couple feet away from me on the floor.

"I was just checking on you." He paused, "I, um, heard you crying. I thought you might be hurt."

I am hurt Zayn. I'm hurt so bad, can't you see that? And you caused it, you idiot. How could you be so stupid not to see that? "I'm fine."

He gave up on that subject with a sigh. "Why aren't you in your bed?"


"That's very vague." he said sarcastically.

"And it's none of your business." I spat at him.

He didn't say anything. He just stared at me, I could see that I hurt him. Great, now I felt bad for hurting him. I just hurt everybody around me, don't I? But he deserved it, he hurt me worse than I could ever hurt him. I wouldn't take back what I said. I just groaned and rolled back over to face the wall again.

"Fine, I'm sorry I ever cared about you Rachel. I'll just leave then, I won't talk to you as long as you are here, don't worry, I'll make sure of it."

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