Lost

This is the final part of the Cyber Louis triology, check both out before reading. After years of torture and distress Reiss has finally made a better life for himself, with his sister Rae and Louis. But even he can't escape his darkest thoughts and his unforgettable past. Rae has found love and he wants so badly to let go and be free, but is it really that simple, is he too lost to be found?

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4. Chapter 4

North was crowded to say the least, Mia clung on to my arm as we made our way through the people to a table. After I knew she wasn't going to be crushed I left her to get us both a drink. Lily was at the bar chatting up the guy in front of me. I rolled my eyes at how desperate she was, maybe she was the girl I could class as the desperate one. Her eyes landed on me and she smiled warmly as I approached her. 
"2 beers please" I said sternly and she nodded pouring them into glasses.
"Does she even like beer?" she raised her brow.
I shrugged "who doesn't?"
She laughed passing me the glasses "I'm here if you need me" she told me.
I nodded and climbed over the people to get to Mia, passing her the beer she pulled a face, maybe I did need her after all. "You don't like beer?" I asked.
She shook her head "sorry, I can drink it, it's fine" and then I felt bad.
"Be right back" I headed back to the bar watching Lily cackle with laughter. 
"She doesn't like beer then?"
I looked back at Mia "what her course she does, she needed something extra" I bluffed making her smile. 
"Let me guess vodka and coke?"
I hid a laugh and nodded my head passing her the money. 
"You don't seem like the type of person to be with a girl like Mia" she observed.
"Oh yeah? and who should I be with?" I lent my arms on the counter making us somehow closer.
She shrugged "I don't know what you're into."
"I'm not really into anyone" I admitted, even though I knew that was only slightly true.
She bit her lip "you'll find someone, but it's a bit contradicting isn't it?"
"What is?" I asked.
"Well I thought you hated liars?" she giggled and moved onto the next customer.

5 beers later and I felt the rush of alcohol consume me. Laughter seemed natural to me without having to fake it. Mia looked at me and smiled "you know I thought you were this bad boy, but you're not."
"Who says I was a bad boy?"
"Everyone, saying you and Louis do bad stuff together, after what he was like."
My stomach sank as she spoke about Louis "Louis' a good guy" 
"It's not what I've heard" she looked at me awkwardly.
"Do you know him?" I tilted my head.
"No but..."
"But nothing" I snapped. "Who are you to judge someone you don't even know. He saved my life on numerous occasions, he's the reason I'm here today in one piece" I shouted at her.
"I'm sorry I didn't know, I think you need to slow down on the drink" she said worried.
I picked up the glass of beer and downed the whole pint "I don't need you giving me advice thanks" I stumbled up and pushed past the people. 
Lily threw down the glass on the counter and rushed past the people "Reiss are you alright?" she said.
"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" I closed my eyes trying not to be sick.
She grabbed my arm and pulled me outside so no one would see me puke. 

After several minutes of throwing my guts up I finally stood up "thanks."
She held out 3 tick tacks and I shoved them in my mouth grateful to get rid of the taste of vomit.
"What was that all about with you and Mia?"
"You sure are nosy aren't you" I laughed.
"I consider it curious, it looks like she got you pretty worked up."
"I don't like people thinking they know everything" I shuddered as I felt the anger rage inside of me.
She looked down and rubbed her arms. I finally noticed what she was wearing, a black skin tight dress she must be freezing. I pulled off my jacket and wrapped it around her "I'm fine" she told me.
"I'm not going to let you freeze to death just so you can be stubborn" I growled at her. I don't know what I was thinking in that moment, or what I was even doing but I tugged the jacket pulling her into me. I wrapped my arms around her waist and kissed her melting at her touch. She kissed me back and pushed her hands through my hair and lifted herself up. I lent her against the wall allowing her to wrap her legs around my waist. A cough brought me back as I let go of her stepping away, noticing it was Louis gave me a mixture of feelings. 
"Louis" I said. 
"Where were you, do you know what day it is?" he said angrily. 
"Tuesday?"
"Well done Reiss, and what happens on tuesdays?"
"I see Dr..." I closed my eyes remembering I missed my appointment with Dr Stevens. "Shit I forgot" I mentally hit myself.
"It's fine but let's get you home Reiss, I think you've had enough" he ordered and I nodded, looking back at Lily I realised she was gone and I sighed following Louis.
"Look I'm sorry" I said to him as I sat next to him in the car.
"You don't need to apologise, I just need you to realise those appointments are important."
"Why they're not helping me?" I said angrily. 
He looked at me "I know that Reiss, but you need to open up to someone. If not him then someone else, what you're doing is not healthy."
"What did you do?" I asked him.
He sighed "I found Rae."
I slumped back in the chair "well I'm not going to find someone anytime soon."
"What about the girl who was all over you?" he tried not to laugh and I found myself blush.
"That was nothing, a moment of madness I guess."
"She's pretty" he said looking at me "not on the league as your sister, but still."
"I know but she's bad news. I need someone ordinary in my life."
"Reiss the sooner you realise your life is far from ordinary the better" and that was the end of the conversation.

I looked at my blog and wrote a new entry, focusing on the comment made earlier today.
I did what you said, I focused on the things and I have came up with a conclusion. Surrounding myself with family is as good as an equally bad idea. I love them and they love me, but when I am as fucked up as I am not that won't work. The hot girl in my class turned out to be a judgemental bitch, need I say more? The person I found as desperate as me I kissed, so what now anonymous?

 

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